Lana Wickstrom; Separation Specialist

I have lamented openly and consistently that separation and divorce is not a legal issue, but instead a social and relationship issue with some legal aspects within - what I see as being far more important than legal advice by lawyers is support and coaching for parents to help them with the incredibly difficult transition from a spousal relationship to a co-parenting relationship, creating self awareness about relationship dynamics and establishing some effective and meaningful communication. None of this desperately needed work can be performed by people only trained in the law and it certainly cannot be found within a courtroom. I help people separate and divorce outside of courtrooms for exactly these reasons.

This article highlights the challenges and sheds some light on alternative ways for us to view how people who are separating or divorcing should access help through this tremendously deep life transition.

"In fact, we should consider removing family law matters from the courts altogether. These are disputes that could be moved into a specialized administrative system offering both adversarial and non-adversarial dispute resolution alongside: education on parenting after separation, child development and conflict management; social services providing parenting, housing and employment support; and financial and mental health counselling, parenting assessments and similar services. Such an administrative system should be interdisciplinary and explicitly aimed at promoting the well-being of children, reducing conflict and promoting parents’ ability to cooperate with each other. Its rules, policies and forms should be written in plain language and be tailored to the unique needs of families living apart; the rules of evidence and stare decisis should be simplified; and the extent of the adversarial and non-adversarial processes provided by the tribunal and the commission should be genuinely proportionate to the circumstances of each family, and the importance, complexity and value of the issues in each dispute."

Family justice in Canada is at a breaking point Deep structural problems persist in how our justice system handles family disputes. We need to think seriously about a complete overhaul.

SABEX awards are coming up soon! I was reminiscing with CTV Saskatoon about my experience last year as a finalist for New Service category - take a look at our piece for event details!

SABEX awards SABEX coordinator Kate Dupuis and former SABEX nominee Lana Wickstrom preview the upcoming event.

Sadly, many families experiencing separation and divorce default to thinking that "lawyering up" is their only option. In addition, because we usually only hear the drama associated with high conflict separations and divorces as compared to the calm of peaceful ones, most people think that separations and divorces must be synonymous with drama, pain and extraordinary expense of many kinds. These default perceptions are not true.

I am proud to offer information and education to clients to help them understand that there are many healthier and better serving options to choose than there used to be - the collaborative process is one of those options that I truly enjoy participating in and am grateful to have extremely skilled colleagues offering this process in Saskatoon.

My role in this process is that of the Family Coach and I help families with the communication challenges, co-parenting best practices and relationship dynamics that often make the other legal issues more challenging in separations and divorces than they need to be. Contact me for more information on this unique process that offers family a "no court" option for their separation and divorce that is also fully supported by legal advice and the most appropriate professionals for the given situation.

A NO COURT approach to Separation and Divorce “Although finalizing the custody agreement and divorce was one big part of why I engaged in the Collaborative Process, having a chance to understand the law and have my questions answered was another big part. I feel less vulnerable and better equipped to handle the future.”– Laurel B.

On the last days of 2018, many are making plans for how they will celebrate the New Year, but many others are making plans about how they will navigate one of the deepest and most consuming decisions of their lives: separation and divorce.

I recently shared some expert advice with Refined Magazine Saskatoon on how to support friends or family who are contemplating, initiating, responding to or struggling with a separation or divorce as January is known as "Divorce Month" - the timing of many separation and divorces align with resolutions for massive change in the new year.

If you or someone you know is struggling with a separation or divorce, please contact me at [email protected].

I started 2018 off again this year by talking to CTV Saskatoon about Divorce Day on Monday, January 8th. The first business Monday of the New Year is always marked by clients contacting family law professionals for help in initiating, responding to, considering, processing or formalizing a separation or divorce. It’s akin to a New Year’s resolution after a period of deep contemplation during the holiday season.

I work outside of courtrooms with both male and female clients who would otherwise often feel isolated, ashamed or alone in this deep life transition.

Sometimes I work 1-1 with clients and sometimes I work with both separating clients - it really depends on the unique factors of each person’s separation story.

Almost all my clients need the harmony of all my skill sets: legal, social work, problem solving, communication, personal development and self care and awareness.

My goal is to meet each client exactly where they are and provide the desperately needed education, support and guidance to help them make informed decisions instead of act on emotional reactions to their separation as they prioritize their financial, social and emotional selves as well as their children’s needs.

If you or someone you know is contemplating, considering, initiating, responding to or struggling with a separation, contact me at [email protected].

Please share as we never know the challenges others are dealing with silently, privately and in isolation.

Divorce Day: Tips for ensuring a smooth breakup On Divorce Day, separation specialist Lana Wickstrom shares tips for a smooth breakup.

Its time to celebrate 🎉 ! I am so incredibly proud of myself for building my business, pursuing my passion and showing up in the world the way I was intended to do!

I am also incredibly grateful for my friends, family, colleagues and specifically to clients who have chosen to trust me with helping them navigate the deepest transition of most of their lives. I am humbled by your dedication, strength and bravery.

Today is the one year anniversary of the culmination of all my strengths in pursuing a career as a Separation Specialist - coaching, educating and supporting separating and divorcing clients to pursue civilized separations and dignified divorces. It is a ride but a ride I'm so grateful I have not missed!

Thank you at all who have touched my life and supported me as I continue to pursue this journey! Drew Pearson thank you for sharing this with me - have a happy and safe long weekend everyone!!

Let me say it's all class at Saskatoon HOME Magazine - Amanda Soulodre and her team hit it out of the park again with their fall issue! So honoured to have had the opportunity to contribute to this magazine at page 64 sharing my expertise regarding Co-Parenting best practises to make separations civil and divorces dignified. Thanks for the opportunity and especially for the incredible personal touch of the handwritten "thanks" I received in the mail from Amanda.

Click the link to learn more see what Saskatoon HOME Magazine has to offer!

http://issuu.com/saskatoonhomemagazine/docs/skhomefall2017_a433adf6e390f4/1?e=1825134/52649180

Again, Women Entrepreneurs of Saskatchewan Inc. thank you for supporting and helping women entrepreneurs shine their light!

Divorce with Dignity Stephanie talks with Separation Specialist Lana Wickstrom.