10/09/2026
my mama is an angel now 🪽
seven months ago we learnt that she had cancer. two months ago ago we kissed her goodbye
I still struggle with how to talk about it - I don’t think English has the right words. Saying “we lost her” makes it seem like she can’t be found? saying “she passed away” makes it seem like she’s totally gone - like her presence isn’t here with us in any form. and neither of those things seem true
My sister and I were talking in the hospital a few days before she took her last breath - and we were both saying how our entire lives, she’s always been the strongest person we know. Even during those last few weeks, she fought with every cell in her body to stay with us as long as she could.
I don’t think that her strength could have come from willpower alone. She dug so, so deep to smile and communicate and to make sure we were ok, even when she was in pain. That kind of strength isn’t normal…I’m convinced it could only come from one thing - pure, motherly love.
They say that grief is just love with nowhere to go - and if that’s true, then I’m grateful for it. It keeps me connected to her in some way. And know I’ll see her again, somewhere beyond the galaxies (her words) - but in the meantime, I’ll look for her in the rainbows and the pressed flowers and the sunsets she loved so much.
If you see me staring at the sky or off into the distance, I’m ok - she is sending me signs all the time.
Tell your loved ones you love them while you can x