Leah Santa Cruz

What will you be thinking about and desiring on your deathbed? It's a question that came up during a 300hr teacher training I took in Bali with back in 2020, where we spent two weeks exploring all things Death. At first, it might sound taboo or dark, but facing this topic head-on was actually incredibly helpful for me. I was able to review my beliefs and fears, and also learn about different cultural and religious customs around death.

One perspective that particularly fascinated me was the Buddhist view on death. Did you know that many monks have a practice that takes them to a “charnel grounds” a place where dead bodies are left to decompose or be eaten by vultures - to dwell in contemplation and comparison about their own body and our origination and dissolution? They even have a death meditation that’s intended to help you celebrate life more. During our training, we did a similar exercise where we imagined ourselves on our deathbeds. It made me reflect on who I would want to be surrounded by, what kind of environment I'd like to be in, and what thoughts would be going through my mind. As well as how precious this life is to me.

-Continued in comments…

You may know that I’ve talked about being a recovering workaholic.

I think it will always be a pattern I have to watch out for because it was such a deeply engrained addiction for 30+ years of my life, starting in school. And I don’t just mean the normal go to school, do your homework and go to work. But staying up all hours of the night consistently working, studying, losing sleep, feeling chronically stressed and irritable. Seeing my physical and mental health decline. Effecting my relationships and all aspects of my life… even resting was difficult because my body was tired but my nervous system was addicted to cortisol and in flight mode.

That’s when it’s no longer just a normal thing you do- it’s a problem.

It took me leaving the environment I was in, a lot of restless meditations, Difficult inner work, counseling and a couple years of living in bali to really put the train on the right track. I didn’t stop the train, I’m not done working or serving a purpose in the world- but I’m done making it my whole entire existence.

Now I value my health, sleep, family, hobbies a lot more than I used to and I actually feel like I’m much more efficient, creative and effective when I do my work, because of it!

I meet so many people every day that come to bali telling me they resonate with my past experiences with burnout. If that sounds like you, I recommend listening to our latest Well Balanced podcast episode with and where we dive deep into where workaholism comes from, how to see the signs of it and burnout, and what to do about it. Link in bio.

Have you experienced workaholism or burnout? What were the signs you noticed and what did you do about improving it? Share in the comments below! 🔥🔥

I’m turning 39 this year and I know I’m still young, but at times, I’ve felt pings of grieving my younger years. Some of it’s the freedom and adventures that I miss, (things seem simpler in hindsight), but some of it’s my youthfulness.

It brings me to ponder the ageism of our society. As a woman I’m bombarded every day with imagery, advertisements and opinions from others that suggests it best that a woman stay looking like she’s in her 20s forever, less she lose her attraction.

Beauty has been a currency of women since the beginning, and now we’re in the workforce making money, but are told in subliminal and obvious ways that losing our physical appeal means a loss of value as an individual and a loss of ability to attract or keep a mate. That could translate into less security, possibility, companionship or love. Important things to a woman (human).

Hence this very real resistance to aging that I and so many others I know have felt at times.

Add into the mix that many of us have core fears of rejection, abandonment, dying or worse- becoming obsolete and discarded..

And you have yourself a perfect ageism cocktail. Initiated by the patriarchy and perpetuated by the beauty and fashion industries - and ultimately women ourselves buying into this BS.

We inject ourselves, wear cover up, use teenage looking filters and degrade ourselves continuously in our minds until self love becomes a very distant idea, or is confused with buying into the next aesthetic treatment because…inherently we believe we are not enough as we are.

And once we reach an age in which we just can’t hide the years on our faces, we get a choice to either do so with grace (acceptance, welcoming and humility), or with disgrace (resistance and denial fueled by feelings of unworthiness).

I recently saw some Madonna videos (who I love and admire as an artist btw), looking very sad indeed with all of the plastic work done and trying to dress the part of a 20 something pop star still. Perhaps it’s self expression, but my assertion is it’s some deep disturbances about aging under the surface…

-read 2nd part in comments…

Are you an introvert or an extrovert? I used to be more of an introverted personality, but interestingly- recently on a Myers-Briggs test, I score slightly into being an extrovert. Im guessing all the years of public speaking has shifted things for me. But I still swing both ways.

Being someone who falls in the border of both can be challenging at times, like when I first started leading classes it was petrifying..but now it's also exciting and allows me to connect with a wider range of people.

Recently, I spent a few days with my best friends in Cabo, and the best part of that trip was not going to lavish parties or social gatherings, but simply hanging out with them on the beach, being silly together over sunset. It reminded me that sometimes the simplest and most intimate things in life can bring us the most joy.

This week on "Well Balanced," our guest Olivia Johnson and I discussed how introverts and extroverts can thrive together. We talked about the importance of understanding and respecting each other's differences, and how it can lead to better communication, teamwork, and relationships. (Link in my bio)

Let me know your thoughts in the comments below! 🙃

Lucca is enjoying his rich social life here in Bali! We think it’s really important that he learn Indonesian and be an active part of the Balinese community.

Living in Bali with our two-year-old has made us acutely aware of the importance of raising a generation of children who are immersed in diverse cultures, religions, and skin colors. We want to do our part in ensuring that our son grows up with a deep understanding and appreciation for all types of people, regardless of their race or ethnicity.

And on the note..in our last week's episode of Well Balanced, we bring on psychologist Dr. Maryam Jernigan-Noesi to talk about the impact of race-related stress and trauma on our mental and physical well-being. As a family, we are committed to ensuring that Lucca does not carry on the same biases and ignorance about race-related stress that has been present in our society.

Check out the latest episode of Well Balanced on the link in my bio, where Ofosu discusses practical tips for taking care of yourself after experiencing or witnessing a traumatic event. We hope that this episode will inspire you to have conversations about race and the impact of racial biases on our mental health.

It’s often believed that if we express sadness then it’s a form of weakness. It requires a lot of vulnerability.

But I would argue that expressing ecstatic joy is also something we tend to shy away from. Out of fear of what others will think of us. Of not being taken seriously.

Two sides of the very same coin of shame and fear.

I had a great convo with Ofosu this week in Cabo about how we can let ourselves feel all spectrum of emotions and overcome those blocks. And how we can be healthier because of it.

Luckily for you we recorded the convo and you can watch or listen in the link in my bio. ❤️🐬

Ps - San Jose del Cabo was amazing !

Is mainstream wellness culture toxic? I've seen so many wellness coaches and yoga teachers struggling with orthorexia - an unhealthy obsession with eating “pure” food. I've seen people injure themselves internally, or mentally - in the name of health. Just today, I saw a news article about a baby that went to the hospital vomiting and dying - only to find that it was extremely malnuroushed and starving because the parents gave it almond milk in a bottle instead of breast/cow/goat/formula. It makes me angry and my heartbreak. 💔

Bottom line…Not every trend is actually healthy. From unrealistic body standards to the glorification of extreme cleanses (that can be harmful for people not absolutely ready), or vilifying the “monkey mind”, in my experience, the mainstream wellness scene can sometimes do harm.

Please be discerning out there friends. Remember to live a little and not always take life too seriously. 😉 And check out this topic more in our latest episode of well balanced (link in my bio).

❤️ with love- Leah

This week my husband took me out on a date to the beach to simply “do nothing”. It was glorious!

Spending even just an hour doing nothing but sitting and listening to the ocean waves. It was a welcome break from the busy-ness of my day. Being a business owner, a teacher, a mom, a chauffeur.

Just being in a deeply meditative state with the ocean. My happy place. 🌅

Sometimes “no” can simply be “no for right now”. Many of those errands and to-do items can wait.

JOY is my word for 2023. I’m tired of doing things because I feel like I “have to” or because “I should” and more for the JOY of doing them. Choosing things because they bring me joy. Saying no to more things that do not. And finding support for the things that don’t bring me joy that might bring someone else joy to do! So I suppose there’s some trust in there too.

What’s bringing me joy right now is taking an abstract art painting class with friends and exploring giving intangible concepts (like motherhood and love) a body of color and texture.

I’m also choosing more quality time with my friends, husby and son. Doing new and exciting activities that bring JOY.

What’s your word of the year?

If you want some guidance in figuring it out- listen to our recent episode of Well Balanced with who walks us through the process of setting a word as a guiding light for your year.

I’ve been doing this for many years now with her guidance and it’s been so helpful! ❤️❤️

As we look back on 2022, it's natural to focus on the challenges and difficulties we faced. For our family, one of the biggest challenges of the year was when our son had to have major mouth surgery at the beginning of the year. It was a stressful and uncertain time, and we were all worried about his health and well-being.

But as the year has progressed, we are grateful to say that our son's medical issues are behind us now and he is a healthy, happy boy. It's times like these that make us realize just how much we have to be grateful for.

No matter how great or difficult the year was for you, it's important to find gratitude in the small things. When things seem tough, it's easy to get caught up in what we don't have or what's not going right.

I noticed if I take a moment to appreciate the little things in life, it can make a big difference in my outlook. For example, being thankful for the roof over my head and the food on my table.

It's also important to remember that gratitude is a choice. I can choose to focus on the negative or I can choose to focus on the positive. When I practice gratitude, I open myself up to the good things in life and attract more positivity.

So if you’re reading this far, take a moment right now to reflect on the small things in your life that bring you joy and comfort. Whether it's the warm sun on your face, a good book to read, or the love and support of your friends and family.

If you were able to think of something you’re grateful for, leave a 🙏🏽 below!