The Millennials Mentor

Happy Pride Month!!!

Find the lesson in each mistake🧐

There are lessons to be learned from everything we do, even when we get it wrong. Agile leaders learn from their mistakes so when you screw up take the time to reflect and analyze. You have to own your mistake, and then move forward.

✨ Try something new ✨

Doing things as they have always been done can be a trap, it is easy to get stuck in what we know and have done before. Leaders who are agile are able to try and test new things, they embrace innovation and change, and ensure their team is equally able to innovate and change.

Be curious and ask questions

Leadership isn’t about having all of the answers; in fact, the best leaders know they don’t. Trust your team and create the space and freedom for them to come up with solutions. 🤝

Approach challenges with curiosity and ask provoking questions, inspire and equip your team to problem solve. 🤔

Be a mentor❗
Pay it forward, be a mentor. Mentoring is a great opportunity to both pass on your own expertise and experience, and to also develop your own leadership.

There is a lot to be learned from supporting others in their own growth so identify at least one person within or outside of your organization who you can mentor. Perhaps this person has already reached out to you, or comes to you for help. 🫶

Contact them and ask them if they are interested in meeting on a regular basis, at least once a month, and then go enjoy, engage, empathize, encourage, learn, and grow.

Do you have a mentor❓
You may have several folks in your life that you rely on when you things come up, but have you considered a more formal mentoring relationship?

That means connecting with a mentor on a regular basis, meeting weekly or monthly, and setting some specific goals for the mentoring relationship. This type of intentional and consistent mentoring can have a real positive impact on your leadership.✨

So go out there and reach out to one or two of your mentors and ask them to formalize the mentoring relationship so you take your leadership to the next level.

Accept Difference, even when it’s hard to do. ✅

Organizations put a lot of pressure on their people to conform to a norm which helps everyone understand their environment, get along, and achieve common goals. However, it can also create an environment that mutes and silences creativity and diversity, which are necessary components of innovation and achievement.

🎉 Celebrate difference in sincere and more complex ways. An international potluck is fun, but it is not the most meaningful way to help people increase their sensitivity. Think of opportunities that are really going to help your team learn and reframe their mindsets. This might be the time when you invest in bringing in SME (Subject Matter Experts) to help your team increase their awareness.

Leaders must equip themselves and their team to challenge bias and stereotypes. Not only to challenge it in others when we hear it and see it, but to challenge our own personal bias and stereotypes. 💪

Both are a biological function of our brain, it is what allows us to make sense of the world around us and create spaces where we feel accepted and safe. 🧠

However, the world has changed faster than our brains and we are now much more exposed to difference. So we have to be able to recognize how our brain has categorized the information and realign our bias and stereotypes that don’t support equity and inclusion, with our conscious values that do.

Being more aware of our bias and sensitive to difference will help organizations recruit and retain talent that are the best of the best and representative of diverse voices and experiences🫶

How can you make it happen❓

It begins with an inclusive and gender parity mindset. You have to believe that inclusion and gender parity is just, and to want your organization to reflect that. It should be at the core of all that you do in order for it to become a lived value and experience within your organization. It isn’t extra, not on top of or in addition to. It isn’t something you get to eventually or correct after you have failed. It is a starting point, your base, and the ultimate check and balance.

Organizations need to make a long term commitment to creating diverse and inclusive workplaces.
💡 This means investing in continuous and ongoing learning and development to ensure that employees develop the awareness, attitudes, skills, and knowledge necessary to be inclusive in their daily interactions with one another and their customers and clients.

❓ How can you Keep It Super Simple (KISS)❓

🧐 Assess the situation Talk to your team and find out what is and isn’t working. Make it clear that you are open to making changes, where possible, and they will be open to telling you where they would like to see improvements.

✍️ Review the process Once you and your team have identified systems or processes that need some work, review and identify the parts that are working, and the parts that need to be fixed, changed, or removed.

🦾 Test new process Now that you’ve got a new system or process, test it. It may take more than one or two adjustments to get it right.

✏️ Adjust If the new system or process needs to be tweaked, then do it. You don’t want to get so set in your ways that you create something new that is worse than the original.

✅ Implement Now that it has been tested and adjusted, make a part of the organizations reality. Be sure that everyone is aware of the changes, and how the new system or process works.

One of the biggest barriers to being taken seriously or seen
as credible is inconsistency. 🚫
In order to trust and respect, your team must able to predict your behavior.

They need to know what to expect. ✅
So it is imperative that you are consistent in your behavior and decision making. This
means you have to walk the talk, and the talk is the “clarity and caring”.

❓ What exactly is Mutual Mentoring❓

The technical definition is “a non-hierarchical developmental relationship based upon mutual reciprocity between two individuals”, which basically means a mentoring relationship where both parties act as mentor and mentee, recognizing that there is something to learn from each other.
As organizations have struggled to understand your generation, develop strong multi-generational teams, and foster age inclusion, “reverse mentoring” began to trend. The idea was simple, bridge the generational gaps by having younger professionals mentor more seasoned professionals, typically on tech related skills.

💡 A shared vision is
a vision that is co-created with leaders and their team that is built upon
their shared values, interests, and purpose for the organization, team, or
project. A shared vision provides a sense of purpose and direction, and is
designed by the team, not imposed by the top. This helps to increase the team’s
level of engagement and commitment to the vision because they are equally invested
in realizing it.

🤝 Establishing a shared
vision does not take a lot of time! It can be done in as quickly as 15 minutes
just by asking a few key questions. And it is also possible to spend hours or
even days developing a shared vision, it is entirely up to you as the leader to
decide.

There can be much more to gain from listening than speaking. Being a good listener requires practice, it is a learned behavior. Here are some Quick Tips to honing your listening skills:

💥 Be present
💥 Be open minded
💥 Be patient
💥 Listen for the hidden message
💥 Ask questions
💥 Offer feedback
💥 Take notes, if necessary
💥 Be conscientious of your body language and non-verbal communication

Read this article for more info: http://tamarathorpe.com/are-you-listening-to-me-hearing-vs-listening/

Having difficult conversations! The Awareness Wheel-a tried and true method 💪

Having difficult conversations stirs up a range of emotions; all of which makes us want to avoid them. We fear saying the wrong thing and having the situation escalate or being misunderstood and not heard. Sometimes it just seems easier to not have the conversation than it is to have it. However, we all know that that only lasts for so long. Eventually, that difficult conversation has to take place.
Enter The Awareness Wheel! It is a communication tool with a dual purpose, it provides both a framework for understanding a difficult situation and communicating about it. I was introduced to the Awareness Wheel as part of a Communications course in my Masters program and well I’ve been spreading the good news ever since.
Here is how it works:
It has 5 phases or steps for reflection and communication; sensing, thinking, feeling, want, and ask/actions.

Sensing 👂
🤔 Thinking
Feeling 🥰
👏 Want
Ask/Actions ❓

To read more about the Awarenee Wheel click here: http://tamarathorpe.com/having-difficult-conversations-the-awareness-wheel-a-tried-and-true-method/

The expression “curiosity killed the cat” is used to encourage people to mind their own business. But there is a clear distinction between being nosy and being curious. 🧐

Curiosity is a critical competence to communicating effectively, resolving conflict, and increasing your intercultural competence (ability to be effective and appropriate in intercultural situations).

💡 Curiosity is not only asking questions, but also being open-minded and acknowledging when there are gaps in information, knowledge, or experience.

Being curious when communicating with others, either in conflict or across cultural differences empowers one to be receptive to new and different ideas, listen actively, and ask questions to fully understand another’s perspective or intention.

There is a gap between the ideal America and the real America. This gap makes it difficult to discuss the disparity in our country, thus making it impossible to resolve it. In order to live in an ideal America, we have to learn to talk about the real America and close the cultural divide.

Read the full article here: https://tamarathorpe.com/the-ideal-vs-the-real-america-how-to-close-the-cultural-divide/

Both personal and social challenges feel so big, and it turn, can make us feel small and powerless. Actually, there is research which has shown that since the 1960’s young people have increasingly felt less and less in control of their destiny or fate. Jean Twenge, a psychologist and generational specialist, found in 2002 that 80% of college students believed that their future was determined by luck or those more powerful than them.

Certainly there will always be things which are out of our control, but there are also a lot of things within our control. Choosing to control your destiny and increase a sense of control empowers you to make decisions and plans which will impact both your present and future. 💪

Get actively engaged in your life! Be conscientious about both the small and big decisions you make each day. Thoughtfulness and hard work will help you create the future you want.

You are what you think! 🫶

The Cycle of Success🔁
These three steps make up the Cycle of Success, it is a strategy that has proven to yield the results you are looking for time and time again.

❗ Know what you want
You have got to take the time to explore your values, beliefs, and passions. Figure out what you really want to achieve while you are here on this planet and let go of all the preconceived ideas you have about a “good job” or the “right career”.

✍️ Make a plan
To have a career that is fulfilling and meaningful you have to lay out a clear path, step by step. And the journey should be as exciting and satisfying as the destination.

🏃‍♀️ Take action
A good plan has SMART goals and milestones. You create measures and markers that you hold yourself accountable and to celebrate your achievements.

With new grads facing the future, there is battle cry for jobs. And not just any job, but a good job.
But good is a relative term.

The first step is figuring out what “a good job” is to you… right now. What is good for you later will be different so try to focus on the present.
What is “a good job”to you?

You have to ask yourself what is my priority? Is it paying the bills? Getting experience? Or both?
Once you know what you are priority is, match it to your experience, qualifications and interests.
How do you do that?

❓ Step One: What can you do?
❓ Step Two: What do you like to do?
❗ Step Three: Know your strengths
❗ Step Four: Sell your strengths

E-mentoring: How to use LinkedIn to Find a Mentor

LinkedIn is one-stop-shop for either a more formal 1:1 mentoring relationship or something informal. Don’t just use LinkedIn as a place to post your professional profile, use it actively and intentionally to:
✨ Make connections
✨ Build relationships
✨ Find resources
✨ Get 1:1 and peer/group mentoring

Those of us who have had great mentors are quick to attest to the many benefits. Being mentored made us feel more grounded and confident, it helped us gain clarity, focus, and direction. So I love connecting people with potential mentors, because I know how valuable it is to be mentored.

However, I have yet to have someone reach out to me to be a mentor. Now as someone who has made a career out of being a mentor, I want to share with you why I think mentoring others is good for you!

💪 Build Your Legacy
🫶 Sharing is Caring
🦾 Reinforcements
🤓 You Can Teach an Old Dog New Tricks
🤝 Be of Service

Learn more about becoming a mentor here: https://tamarathorpe.com/why-mentoring-is-good-for-you/