Scott Feldman :: 210 Coaching

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WHY❓

You may be asking why if you are in a transition or other challenging circumstance.

When we're 2 or 3 years old, this one-word question enters our vocabulary and never leaves.

We are meaning makers, so we naturally want to know why.

🤔But why often is not the most helpful question.

There's another question that opens up all kinds of possibilities.

It shifts our perspective and focus from the past to the future.

Most importantly, it aligns us with the active work of God 🙏and what He is trying to accomplish in and through us in the present moment.

And it's just one word.

Ready for it?

👉WHAT👈

Yep, that's it!

Rather than asking why did this happen or why am I here, try these prayerful questions and see what you discover:

➡ Lord, WHAT are you teaching me about myself in this season?
- WHAT am I clinging to?
- WHAT do I need to let go of?
- WHAT do I need to embrace?

➡ Lord, WHAT are you teaching me about You in this season?
- WHAT is this showing about what I really believe about you?
- WHAT do you want me to know and experience about your character?
- WHAT steps of faith are you calling me to take today, in this moment even?

Asking why requires we see the big picture, but asking WHAT postures us to receive from and respond to God.

This aligns us with His activity and purposes, which ultimately moves us in the big picture direction we most long to see - even when we can't see it.

Alignment is key, but more on that later 😋

==> So, WHAT is He showing you in this season?

I have as confession to make….

We have two garbage disposals in the house, and I’m one of them.

I hate throwing away leftovers because it feels wasteful.

You know how it is – the kids gravitate toward the new and fresh.

So my🍛 lunch is often a hodgepodge of scraps – healthy, yes, but enticing, no!

👉Men, while it may be ok to settle for scraps in some areas of life, one place you can’t is in your walk with God.👈

It’s easy to rationalize why we do this…

“It feels selfish to spend time alone with God when there is so much to do”

“My wife and kids need so much of me, how can I take some of that time for me?”

We have to reframe the question.

Maybe its not selfish, but strategic...

Proverbs 4:23 says, “Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.”

Your heart is the wellspring of your life.

Treat it as such.

Don’t settle for scraps.

"He is the radiance of the glory of God..." Heb 1:3

Take just 1 minute this morning and reflect on what the Lord is illuminating☀️ in your life today.

🙌Share this post if you find it encouraging!

Guys - Is your morning routine working for or against God's design for success?

I found this 🎥video helpful from Andrew Huberman about research into the biology of what makes for optimal physical and emotional energy 📈throughout the day.

Two tweaks for me - delay coffee ☕ 30 min after I wake up (replaced the first mug full with water) and stand outside in the light 🌄 for 5 min while I eat breakfast.

Make the most of your day for the sake of others!

The Optimal Morning Routine - Andrew Huberman Andrew Huberman, Ph.D., is a neuroscientist and tenured Professor in the Department of Neurobiology at the Stanford University School of Medicine. He has mad...

Why five fingers…?

Read on for a treat 😜

Last week we talked about the 4 key areas God works in our lives to develop us for the long run so we finish well.

👉 (T)rajectory – (R)eplenishment – (A)wareness – (C)hoices

Hopefully you started to identify where God may be at work in you during this season.

To help, I’ve been using an online assessment 💡 for a few years to pinpoint where to focus your attention in these four areas.

It was created out of the lifelong development research I wrote about and provides helpful guidance and resources to move you forward.

It’s called TRAC (creative, huh?) and provides you with personalized coaching around your growth areas, so you can intentionally respond to God’s work in you so He can do His work through you.

It is normally $30 for the full report, but I can distribute it for half that –🔥 just $15!🔥

I would love to get it into the hands of as many people as possible because I have found it so helpful in my own life.

✅So… to sweeten the pot, I’ll also provide a FREE 1-hr coaching session over zoom to review and apply your results to the FIRST FIVE people who comment below.
Normally, this costs $200!

If interested, let me know and I’ll send you the details. It only takes about 10 minutes to complete and really gives you some handholds for your personal and spiritual growth.

Seriously guys, this is the cost of a fast-food meal🍔 (thank you inflation) for the sake of your soul. Small investment for a BIG reason.

Because we all want to finish well, and that means recognizing and responding to God’s work in us TODAY.

Blessings!

As a parent, a big part of what I’m trying to help my kids do is learn to make wise choices. 🤔

As Christ-followers, we’re confronted with choices all the time, but as we progress in our journey, the decision isn’t always cut-and-dry.

And often, God uses these situations to flush out something deeper within us – trust.

👉CHOICES 👈are the last of 4 key areas God works in our lives to develop us for the long run so we finish well.

Men who finish well grow deeper in their trust and dependence upon God, revealed through the choices they make.

They are intentionally focused on living a life surrendered to the Lord in obedience, and they take steps to align their decisions and behaviors with Him. They do this through a posture of growing trust and dependence upon God.

✅Some questions that can help you understand choices are:

🔹…am I seeking to surrender and align with God in not just the big things, but the small things too?
🔹…have I submitted my kingdom to His kingdom, or is there rivalry in any area?
🔹…am I saying no to the good so I can say yes to the best?
🔹…do I trust God in the midst of uncertainty through my actions, not just my beliefs?

✅Working through issues of choice yields the following fruit in our lives:

🔹…new and changed behaviors flowing out of changed hearts
🔹…greater freedom and joy as we walk within the purposes of God
🔹…the ability to make critical choices that can have massive impacts on our lives and others

❓So, how do you know if God is working in the area of choices in your life?

🔹…do you struggle with indecisiveness, to make key decisions to follow God’s direction in a specific area?
🔹…are you unwilling to act or take a risk even though you know God is calling you forward?
🔹…are you intentionally saying “no” to the 99% of good things in order to say “yes” to the few that are best and most strategic?
🔹…do you feel stuck because you are struggling to trust God in a certain area?

Next time, we’ll talk about what to do when you sense God working in one of these key areas. I’ll also share a helpful tool 🧰I’ve found to help you navigate and grow in these areas.

I’ve coached leaders from Fortune 500 companies to local churches, and the one commonality I see in all their challenges is this:

👉The real action is internal.👈

Yes, the problems are complex and multifaceted, but the key piece of the puzzle is not tactics and strategy (these are necessary but not sufficient).

It is who they understand themselves to be and how they are showing up for others.

Our self-awareness shapes the limits of what we can and should do in situations.

And this is true for all of us, whether we have the formal title “leader” or not.

💡AWARENESS is one of 4 critical areas God works in our lives to develop us for the long run so we finish well.

Men who finish well embrace a dynamic sense of calling, that encompass both who they are (identity/shape) and what they do.

They intentionally embrace and align themselves with God’s unique shape and gifting, rather than seeking to become someone else out of fear or ambition.

➡️Some questions that can help you understand awareness are:

🔹…do I understand and embrace who God has made me to be?
🔹…am I more focused on personal fulfillment or discovery & fulfillment of my kingdom role and purpose ? (*hint* these are not mutually exclusive!)
🔹…do I seek and receive input from my community to understand my strengths and blindspots?

✅Working through issues of awareness yields the following fruit in our lives:

🔹…a more healthy and non-anxious presence with others, resulting in healthier environments I lead
🔹…clarity regarding my calling and unique contribution for the kingdom
🔹…greater freedom in my work as I live out of who I am

❓So, how do you know if God is working in the area of awareness in your life?

🔹…do you know how God has shaped and equipped you to make an impact for his kingdom?
🔹…do you have clarity about who God made you to be, and how He has “wired” you?
🔹…are you living for a definition of success defined by God for you or for someone else?
🔹…are you more driven by striving to please others or not making mistakes than living in the freedom of an audience of One?

❓What resonated with you from this?

Thirsty? 🥤

Maybe you’re like me and have to start your day with a cup of coffee… or three. ☕☕☕

Whether coffee or water, we can’t survive long without refreshment, and our souls are no different.

REPLENISHMENT is one of 4 key areas God works in our lives to develop us for the long run so we finish well.

Men who finish well prioritize their personal growth, renewal and self-care.

They seek to grow in intimacy and dependence upon God, intentionally engaging in spiritual disciplines and rhythms that feed this relationship and help form them into the character of Christ.

Some questions that can help you understand replenishment are:

🔹…do I assume responsibility for self-care and actively seek renewal, or do I just assume it will happen without attention?
🔹…does my relationship with God shifted from what feels like God chasing me to me chasing God?
🔹…am I growing in my ability to hear and understand God’s voice?
🔹…do I periodically change rhythms or spiritual disciples to better position myself to respond to God’s work in my heart?

Working through issues of replenishment yields the following fruit in our lives:

🔹…refreshment of our body, mind and spirit bringing more sustainable energy for life and ministry
🔹…greater influence through deepening intimacy with God
🔹…confidence to move forward in difficult areas of life

So, how do you know if God is working in the area of replenishment in your life?

🔹…do you find yourself seeking relief (quick fixes) more than true rest?
🔹…do you struggle to go deeper with Christ and stay close to Him?
🔹…do you feel dry or stuck with your current spiritual practices?
🔹…do you struggle with taking time to take care of yourself vs everyone else?

Tomorrow we will dive into the next key area of God’s development in our lives: Awareness 💡

What resonated with you (or confused you) regarding replenishment? Please comment below so we can continue the conversation!

“Where am I?”

Ever realized what you thought was the trail turned out not to be? I’ve gone down my share of deer paths by accident only to realize a minute or more later that I was way off track.

So, I end up backtracking to what I know in order to reorient myself and chart the path forward.

It’s the same in life…. which is one reason we call it our “walk” with the Lord.

Last time I mentioned four areas that God works in to develop us for the long run so we finish well.

Today we cover the first… TRAJECTORY.

Simply put, men who finish well live with a big-picture perspective of their life and journey.

They see the past, present and future in light of God’s work in their lives, and this helps them interpret their current situation and direction.

Some questions that can help you understand your trajectory are:

…how has God developed me through each stage of my life so far?
…how do I tend to respond to God’s developmental work? Do I resist, run or engage?
…where might He be leading now based on where He has brought me before (life direction)

Working through issues of trajectory yields fruit in our lives, including:

…Life Lessons – what do we dare not forget, and what can we pass on to others?
…Core Convictions and Values – what are the driving passions that connect who I am with what I do, and which bring energy and satisfaction to my work?
…Direction – what are those next steps God is inviting me to take in my journey with Him?

So, how do you know if God is working in the area of trajectory in your life?

…do you know where you are headed and how to get there?
…do you understand how God has shaped you to this point, and where He is leading out of that?
…do you have clarity on what God is doing in your current circumstances?
…do you tend to be impatient and get ahead of God?

Tomorrow we will dive into the next key area of God’s development in our lives: Replenishment.

What resonated with you (or confused you) regarding trajectory? Comment below so we can continue the conversation!

“Well done!”

Isn’t that what we long to hear from our Savior as Christian men striving to lead and love others well?

So how do we help ensure we finish well as husbands, dads, leaders and mentors?
Because no one wants to be a statistic…and no one ever thinks they WILL be.

Wouldn’t it be great if someone studied what it actually took to finish well over the course of our lives?

Well, someone did!

In “The Making of a Leader,” Dr. Robert Clinton distilled his research of 3,000 biblical, historical, and modern-day Christ-followers and leaders to answer this question.

Christ-followers who finished well showed these 3 characteristics:

#1 – They are intentional in their personal development.

#2 – They experience repeated times of personal renewal.

#3 – They are committed to gaining the help of coaches and mentors.

Alright, quick gut check… how many of these boxes are you currently checking?

Whether you checked all boxes or none, I am going to equip you with key actionable info over the next few days to accelerate your personal development.

Clinton’s research showed that effective personal development requires 2 things – situational clarity (where am I?) and sovereign perspective (where am I going?).

Before you figure out where you need to go, you need to first know where you are.
More specifically, where might God be at work in your current circumstances and challenges to shape you for the long term?

Back to the research, there are 4 key areas that God tends to be at work in us.
Getting clarity here gives focus and courage to respond to His work and propel you forward.

TRAJECTORY
REPLENISHMENT
AWARENESS
CHOICES

We will explore each of these area over the next week to help you identify where God may be at work in your life, so you can respond with greater clarity and confidence.

Because its not just about the here and now.

Its about the long game.

And its about those we love who depend on us.

If this resonates with you, please comment below and let me know! This also helps me get this critical info in front of more men who can benefit.

(Special thanks to Terry Walling and LeaderBreakthru for distilling this research into actionable resources!)

A good word 📖 today from John Piper and Desiring God.

What promise do you need to meditate on today?