Whole Relationship Coaching

Part 2
How to self-soothe.
The ability to self-soothe is an importat skill to use in any high intensity situation. Controlling your emotions can also keep your health in check.
The first step in any disagreement where your emotions are overwhelming is to remove yourself from the situation without increasing the conflict. When your body is flooded with emotions, it is important to let your partner know you need to stop the conversation and take a break.
Once you have stepped away, find somewhere quiet where you can relax and calm your mind and body. Allow the stress to slowly leave your body as you focus your thoughts on things that wll bring you peace. Take your mind away from the stressful conversation.
Begin slow breathing exercises until your breathing falls back into the normal range. Close your eyes and envision a serene setting. Allow your mind to shut out any unpleasant thoughts. This process may take 20-30 minutes to get your body functions back in the normal range. Take as much time as you need before you return to conversing with your partner. When you are ready to revisit the conversation, plan out how you will engage in conversation without entering into a high stress level.


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Part 1
Conflict and physical health.
When you and your partner are in a heated conversation, your body activates your autonomic nervous system. The body reacts with the stress hormones, adrenaline and cortisol. Your heart rate and blood pressure may increase and you may begin to feel weak and dizzy. This is called flooding; when your system is overloaded with emotions and you cannot process information effectively. At this point, it is best step away from the conversation and take a break. This will give yourself a chance to self-soothe and recover from the stress overload.




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Close up the month of love with these three ways to make your partner feel loved. End the month feeling the love.
1. Thank your partner for their love. Be specific. Recall one thing they do that makes you feel loved.
2. Express your gratitude for their support and committment to the relationship.
3. Let your partner know how your life has been enriched by them. Present an example.
Love grows by inches at times. Valentine's Day should not be the only time you express or show your love. Keep the love momentum going by staying connected.

Our Premarital counseling program is uniquely specialized for each individual couple. It is designed with your personalitites in mind. The program will prepare you for marriage, through thought out discussions of major topics couples are likely to encounter in their married life. Your marriage is the most important relationship in life so go into it prepared.
For more information:
[email protected]

Couple New Years' Resolutions.
Start out in the New Year with intentional time spent together. What do you want your marriage to look like in the New Year? How do keep your marriage on track? What can you do to to stay connected?
Keep your marriage as the highest priority. Staying connected with one another means you are in a better place to navigate when going through challenges.
These are just a few things you can do on a daily/weekly schedule.

1. Christmas shopping and lunch.
2. Drive around and look at Christmas lights/decoations and drink hot chocolate.
3. Visit a Christmas market.
4. Go ice skating.
5. Watch winter or Christmas movies with popcorn and treats.
6. Have some holiday photos of yourselves taken.
7. Do some holiday baking; cookies, bread together.
8. Decorate a Gingerbread house together.
9. Go see a holiday show together; the Nutcracker, a Christmas play, A Christmas contata, etc.
10. Donate some time to a worthy cause; soup kitchen, donate gifts to a toy drive, bake and deliver goodies to a senior center, etc.

It may seem easier to avoid the hard conversations. But in the end, you may find it creates distance between you and your partner. The best way to deal with conflict is to schedule a time when you are both calm and stress free. Use kind words and listen to hear. End the conversation on a loving note. You can agree to disagree. Remember conflict is inevitable. It's how you manage it that is imporant.