09/30/2015
This. Because not every ride can be a good ride.
Avoiding those bad days, a discussion:
Few riders haven't had one, a day when either you, or your horse, or both of you are "having a bad day" of one kind or another.
Say you are tired, or hassled at work, or have had an argument with someone, or frustrated by your car that wouldn't start---It doesn't take much.
Or say your horse is high from being stuck inside in the rain, or stiff from a long workout the previous day, or spooking at the loud leaf blower---It doesn't take much.
And, say, that you had planned to work on something, like walk-trot transitions, or shoulder in, or flying changes, or cantering circles, whatever.
And you can feel it starting to bubble up, that tension, frustration, anxiety, anger, resistance, stiffness, all those negatives, either within you, or within your horse, or within both of you.
And you know exactly where it can lead, to an increasingly adversarial session, that snowball effect, so that the worse it gets, the worse it gets.
And the problem with getting into a fight with a horse is that with many horses, the damage doesn't just evaporate by the next day, and if you say, "I apologize", it means nothing to a horse.
You are going to have to apologize by the way you ride him, and if you really scared or hurt him, that may take many days, and on each of those days, because he doesn't quite trust you, he will likely feel "resistant" and you are going to have to be doubly careful that you don't get into another altercation, and now be even deeper in the hole.
So what can you do to avoid those bad days?
You can make a plan on a good day about what you will do on a bad day, so as to not make the bad day worse. You can just get off and put him away. You can get off and lunge him, but not in an angry, fast way. You can go for a walk, if he isn't going to jig and shy, and make you more annoyed. You can ask a friend or your trainer to get on if you can't find the key to the problem.
In other words, acknowledge right up front, that your path is not going to be one unending progression where "Every day, in every way, we're getting better and better", because it isn't how things work. So decide coping strategies for those potentially downward spiraling days before they happen, so when they do happen, which they absolutely will, you can prevent a bad day from becoming a whole lot worse, with negative repercussions that last well past the actual day.