The Healing Place

The Importance of Setting Achievable Goals How Realistic Goals Prevent Burnout and Support Well-Being

Coping with Grief During the Holidays The holiday season is often a warm and joyful time. Parties, gift giving, holiday traditions, and time spent with friends and family can make the season special. But when one has experienced a loss – a relationship break...

On the 7th day of Alliance Counseling, we’re highlight Carol Ann’s incredible contributions to our mission. Learn more about Carol Ann: alliance-counseling.com/carol-ann-bridgman




This holiday season, we’re reflecting on an incredible year of growth, milestones, and meaningful moments with The 12 Days of Alliance Counseling! Follow along each day as we celebrate these moments and more, showcasing what makes Alliance Counseling so special.

Friend or Foe? Taming the Inner Critic What is the Inner Critic, and do you have one?

We’ve talked before about how anxiety is a good liar. Often telling you something is going to go wrong, even with little evidence to back up that assumption. 🔊⁣
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Trauma can also exacerbate things. When someone experiences trauma, it can make us more vulnerable to perceiving threats, or overestimating the severity or danger of a situation. ⚠⁣
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To make things even more tricky, our bodies are not very good at differentiating on its own between actual and perceived danger. This means whether you are anxious because you’re late for work, or anxious because you are being chased by a bear, the sympathetic nervous system (“fight or flight”) is activated. ⚡⁣
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So imagine anxiety creating thoughts telling you something is going to go wrong - And maybe trauma has you assuming danger happens frequently - Along with a dysregulated body seemingly confirming all of the above are true. And to top it all off, we often underestimate our ability to cope and adapt when things aren’t going our way in big or even small ways. Oof. 🔥⁣
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Awareness goes a long, long, long, way. 🧠⁣
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Take some nice deep breaths and ask yourself these 3 questions. You’ll probably usually find that the situation is not life threatening, danger is being overestimated - which means things will probably be OK, and you actually have a lot of strengths you can use to cope in the situation. ✨⁣
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We’ve talked before about how anxiety is a good liar. Often telling you something is going to go wrong, even with little evidence to back up that assumption. 🔊
Trauma can also exacerbate things. When someone experiences trauma, it can make us more vulnerable to perceiving threats, or overestimating the severity or danger of a situation. ⚠
To make things even more tricky, our bodies are not very good at differentiating on its own between actual and perceived danger. This means whether you are anxious because you’re late for work, or anxious because you are being chased by a bear, the sympathetic nervous system (“fight or flight”) is activated. ⚡
So imagine anxiety creating thoughts telling you something is going to go wrong - And maybe trauma has you assuming danger happens frequently - Along with a dysregulated body seemingly confirming all of the above is true. And to top it all off, we often underestimate our ability to cope and adapt when things aren’t going our way in big or even small ways. Oof. 🔥
Awareness goes a long, long, long, way. 🧠
Take some nice deep breaths and ask yourself these 3 questions. You’ll probably usually find that the situation is not life threatening, danger is being overestimated - which means things will probably be OK, and you actually have a lot of strengths you can use to cope in the situation. ✨

Since I haven’t shown up in the feed for a while, I thought this would be a good time to reintroduce/share a little more about myself. 👋⁣⁣
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This winter has been hectic. I had to renew my certification for SA counseling & started applying/interviewing for postdocs (they like to torture you even after you graduate). 📚⁣⁣
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I’m so happy to be close to the end of this process. It’s been a hard road. I had babies. Did clinical placements for no pay, worked a 2nd clinical job to pay the bills, and did my assignments at night. 🛣⁣⁣
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I’ve experienced the depths of exhaustion & burnout. 🕯⁣⁣
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The year before internship I worked as a director in a correctional substance abuse program to save for when I would get paid 💩. Plus leading with kindness & compassion in a place where everyone thinks you’re crazy for that was fun to me.⁣⁣
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I’m an enneagram 4. A Scorpio Sun - Aquarius Moon - Pisces Rising. It explains my “quirky” set of personality traits. ♏♒♓⁣⁣
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I believe in the inherent goodness of all, even when it’s covered by layers of the not-so-good. Not everyone is connected to those parts of themselves. 🎭⁣⁣
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My superpower is sitting with people and really seeing them. It may not sound too exciting but I’ve grown to appreciate this gift more over time. 👁‍🗨⁣⁣
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My spirit animal is the otter (I didn’t choose this, it just is). I value playfulness & don’t like too many rules. 🌈⁣⁣
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I have a history of losing myself to addiction to worry and self-doubt, which used to result in taking the edge off with any convenient opportunity. But as a recovering perfectionist I value presence so I can choose self-love and compassion for others. 🌝⁣⁣
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I am very grateful for this community & the awesome humans that show up here. It’s too easy to find that elsewhere. I appreciate y’all. ♥⁣⁣
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PS- 📸 by one of my favorite humans at one of my favorite places on the most freezing day.⁣⁣
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Hey community & neighbors! 👋🏼⁣⁣
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If you’re wondering where the heck I’ve been….wellll 🤔⁣⁣
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✅ Hibernating.⁣⁣
✅ Perfecting the art of mindful procrastination (aka recovering perfectionists combating the urge to get everything done ASAP).⁣⁣
✅ Embracing my need to just exist without having to always be fulfilling the needs of external people, places, & things.⁣⁣
✅ Being present with loved ones.⁣⁣
✅ Finishing a project on multicultural competent supervision.⁣⁣
✅ Working with clients.⁣⁣
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As much as I want to show up when, how, and as often as I want in every aspect of my life, it’s just not possible to do without making myself ill mentally, physically, socially, & emotionally. 🕯⁣⁣
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Guilt & feeling obligation can make choosing where to focus your energy confusing. 😵⁣⁣
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Clarifying values can ease this need for guidance. Values are your beliefs and what is most important to you. Values can be just about anything like family, achievement, success, relaxation, fun, spirituality, loyalty, humor, etc. 🌟⁣⁣
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Values can help guide your choices, clarify what areas may need more attention, and how you want to prioritize your energy. ⚡⁣⁣
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The more your external behaviors match internal values, the more the magic happens. 🌛⁣⁣
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🔻🔻 What are some of your top values? ✍🏼✍🏽✍🏿 Let me know! ♥⁣⁣
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Anxiety can be described as an uncomfortable or distressing emotional or physical response to demanding situations in day-to-day life. A small amount of stress can be healthy because it keeps us alert to potential hazards and helps with productivity. However, when this becomes excessive and persistent it can lead to more frequent problems with anxiety.💥 ⁣⁣
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Anxiety leads to uncomfortable symptoms such as worry, fear, a racing heart, sweating, or feeling overwhelmed.💣⁣⁣
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Avoidance happens when these uncomfortable symptoms are soothed by avoiding the anxiety-producing situation. Examples include using drugs or alcohol to numb feelings or procrastinating, but there’s many more.✖ ⁣
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Avoiding gives immediate relief. The symptoms of anxiety lessen, which is great right? NOPE! Because it’s only temporarily.⏳ ⁣⁣
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Long-term anxiety growth happens because the fear that initially leads to avoidance worsens, and the brain learns that when anxiety is avoided, distress and uncomfortable feelings go away. As a result, avoidance is reinforced and more likely to happen in the future, and the symptoms of anxiety can likely be worse going forward.🧠⁣⁣
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As uncomfortable as these feelings and sensations may be, it is actually helpful and important to sit with them. Give them attention. Think about what your anxiety is trying to tell you. How is it trying to help and protect you?🆘⁣⁣
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How does the cycle of anxiety effect you? Comment below!⏬ ⁣⁣
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Respecting your energy is SO important. It means valuing your mental, physical, and emotional capacity first and foremost. ⚡️⁣
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Not your CAPABILITY, but Your CAPACITY at that point in time. ☕️⁣
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Though we are able to do much, that doesn’t always mean it’s necessary or beneficial to do something just because you can. 🏃🏽‍♀️⁣
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Though it may seem counterintuitive, prioritizing your needs first actually usually gives you more resources to give and do for others. ☄️⁣
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Weird right? And not only do people tend to feel better themselves when they do this, the things you’re doing feel more enjoyable/less awful too. 😻⁣
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This is something I’ve been working on a lot recently. I’ve been trying to practice what I preach and not do things because I “can” or think I “should,” which is why I’m not on here as much as I want to be. 😪⁣
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Family, School, Work - all things right now that require a lot of attention and energy. So my options are to fill up every minute of my day, OR I can respect my energy, take care of myself, trust things will happen in divine timing, and give myself permission to allow space to just exist. 🏝 ⁣
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How can you respect your energy today? ⬇️⁣
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