InsideOut Pathways Inc

"Prison will be a relief".

I've known Tamz for quite some time now. What I've seen of her is someone who keeps trying, even when life keeps knocking her down.

The pic was taken yesterday.. just after she'd spent some time crying and trying to push through the pain of detox.

The following is shared in her own words.

--

Behind the smile.

Im Tamz 47 and I identify as a addict ..

Today I dont say clean because the flip side indicates dirty I just say "today im doing ok ," ( thankyou QUIHNN )

Its not substances that are my downfall its life , people, places ,things ..

MY FUTURE..

Im sick of keeping this secret so here goes im facing a big laggin' next year of maybe 5 years ...

While im subsequently buying time and doing the right suggested things the interlude of this life part is looming its way into my mind and when I moved into this new place my mind went to dark places .

I turned my ph off and whilst unpacking I decided to come off all prescribed meds n try to find a place of peace n calm in my mind ..

What does that look like ?

Im yet to see! I have cried and dreamt horrific past traumas ( detoxing from substances in jail was horrendous but this has been a close equivalent) coming off prescribed meds is brutal n the sweats n sleep n pain r next level )

Im doing this as i often do as I feel crazy i have not had a moment since the incident in January to stop .

I.have not sat n taken a moment to accept my son leaving 12 years ago or my daughter over a year ago.

I wish that after I got out of jail 10 years ago id asked for help and instead of working 6 days a week n being a mum n doing recovery id done trauma therapy n got support.

Now im broken n scared ..not of jail .
Prison will be a relief as theres routine there ., a permanent roof n 3 meals .

Atm my rent is my wage plus more n im at food bank daily .whilst greatful for this house n services my mind is thinking about the next earn or how to make a dollar go far. Its hard to not fall backwards . Im cleaning atm for work to supplement.

I have faked my smile n got up n went with life daily til a few days ago .. I know this to shall pass.. This time though I cant begin to live untill this trial commences n sentence is passed .

Im not saying I dont deserve a sentence or playing the poor me card . Im upset because I made choices I shouldn't have during my recovery over last 10 years n thought being clean that I was a guru or not able to ask ..There is a serious lack of help in mental health n family support on exiting .

A dead shoplifter won't stop the next shoplifter.

This morning I read a story about a man who allegedly shoplifted from a shopping centre not too far from where I live. He fled the scene, collapsed and died.

Couldn't help myself, but I dove straight into the comments.

"Good".
"Excellent outcome".
"I love good news stories".
"Hopefully there'll be more of it".
"I'm missing the tragic part".
"Glad he's gone".
"He won't be stealing again".

There were 100s more like this.

Not an ounce of empathy, all talking like they knew exactly who this man was and what led him there. Like he's just some scumbag that got what he deserved.

I also saw a few comments which went along the lines of

"I've had a hard life and I never turned to crime".

Yeah, maybe thats true, but after spending quite some time in this space, I think a lot of people have no idea what "hard" actually looks like.

Hard is not having to tighten the belt for a few months. Or cancelling the Netflix subscription. Or doing OT to cover some of the bills. Or lying in bed awake all night stressed about the mortgage.

If you've followed the page long enough, you'd know we've sat across people who genuinely don't know where they're sleeping that night.

We've sat with people who were introduced to drugs in their PRE-TEENS. People who grew up surrounded by violence, addiction, neglect.

We've met people who walked out of prison with one bag containing EVERYTHING they owned. No job. No licence. No money. No family. No support network. Nothing.

We've met people who've got out and are trying their best to stay clean but the only place they can get parole to is a boarding house filled with the exact people and environment they're trying to escape from.

We've met people who have never had a single positive role model their entire lives.

And NO, none of that excuses crime.

But if you can't understand how a person might end up making decisions out of desperation, then maybe you've never actually seen real struggle up close.

Earlier this year, my son and I were in the city when we watched police detain a man outside Target. He'd been caught stealing a pair of thongs. My son started crying.

He wanted me to intervene and ask if they'd let him go if I paid for the thongs. And just for the record, I don't raise my kids to hate police. I asked him what made him upset and he said 'He looks sad'.

My son saw a sad man. Most people would just see a thief.

So, truth is, we know nothing about the man in this story. We don't know what he was going through, what battles he was fighting. We dont know what happened in the hours, days or years before that moment.

Look, if this guy had stolen from you personally, broken into your home, hurt someone you loved I could probably understand the hate.

But all these people see is one headline that says 'SHOPLIFTER' and think its okay to celebrate his death.

FOH, you think one dead shoplifter is going to reduce crime? That the death of one stranger is going to keep the community safer?

Tomorrow there will be another person stealing. Another person battling addiction. Another person being released with no where to go.

You can celebrate someones ending all you want, it's not gonna change whatever is creating thousands more just like him.

The following was sent to us by a mother who has given us permission to share it.

--

My son is currently incarcerated in SE QLD. I was looking forward to finally being able to hold my son after a long stint in jail. Now I’m losing hope, and my son who is finally getting his act together and growing up with the hopes to come home to his family his kids, is too.

Can I ask a question as a mum who is trying to understand the justice system?

My son is currently incarcerated and has recently been charged with multiple counts of breaching a DVO while in custody.

What I struggle to understand is that he says he was told by the protected person that the DVO was being amended, and he believed that was happening. He also says her phone number was added to his approved contact list under a different name, and that letters and photos of their children were sent under a different name.

My son has already applied for parole and was hoping to be released later this year. These new charges have left our family worried and confused about what happens next.

Can anyone explain how charges like these might affect a parole application? Also, if the alleged breaches occurred some time ago, why would police wait nearly two years before laying charges? Is that common?

I'm not looking to argue with anyone or blame anyone. I'm simply a mother trying to understand the process and what my son may be facing moving forward.

Thank you to anyone who can offer respectful advice or share their experience.

Kind regards
Confused Mother

Two weeks from now, a man I've recently spoken to could be in prison.

He hasn't told his kids it might happen. Or his boss. He hasn't even allowed himself to think too far ahead.

He's just going to work every day pretending everything is normal while waiting for a magistrate to decide whether or not he loses his freedom.

I spoke to him last week. He's terrified! He's not your typical 'crim'.

Early 30s. Wife. Kids. Full-time job.

The kinda guy you'd probably stand next to in line at Bunnings and never think twice about.

He's not claiming to be innocent. He owned it, straight up.. but without saying too much he was just a guy making poor decisions trying to keep his head above water in the wrong kind of way.

He knew he was pushing his luck. Kept telling himself he'd pull his head in and every time would be his last.

Until eventually there wasn't a next time and now he's waiting to be sentenced.

This will be his first time in jail, and the questions he had for me weren't what I had expected.

He wasn't worried about prison itself. It wasn't about the violence. Or sharing a cell. Didn't ask about prison politics or even how long he might get.

His concerns weren't about his time inside. They were about the life that would keep moving without him.

What happens to my job?
What happens to my wife?
How do I explain this to the kids?
What do I tell people?
How often will I get to speak to them?
What if they think I abandoned them?

That last one hit me as I had to live through exactly the same thing.

The reality is, most people out here have no idea what prison is actually like. Their understanding comes from movies, TV shows..

But most people do understand is what it's like to be a parent...

To tuck your kids into bed... to take them to sport on the weekend... to sit around the dinner table together. To just 'be there'.

And now for the first time in his life he's facing the possibility of not being there.

The offences happened a while ago. Since then he's cleaned his life up. Changed his crowd. Focused on work. Focused on his family. Even gave up the booze.

Done everything he can think of to become a different person from the guy who made those decisions.

But consequences don't disappear just because you've changed.

So now, every day he wakes up and the first thing he thinks about is sentencing. He'll be sitting at work and it'll pop into his head. He'll take the kids to the park and it'll pop into his head.

I asked him what scared him the most. Then he got me with another one that just felt too close to home,

"I'm scared my kids will think I chose this".

Now, this post isnt about whether he deserves to go to prison or not. That's not my decision to make. And it's not about excusing his behaviour either.

This is just to highlight something we rarely talk about... The human side to waiting.

The months between the offence and the sentence. The sleepless nights. The anxiety. The uncertainty... Alone.

Nobody around him knows what hes carrying.

He still goes to work

Still smiles.

Still answers 'good mate' when someone asks how he's going...

Prison might not be for another couple of weeks, but mentally he's already there.

$128,692. That's how much it costs Queensland taxpayers each year to keep one person in prison.

The stats say just under half of the people released from prison in Queensland will end up back behind bars within two years. People who work inside the system often tell me the reality of this is much higher. And after spending years in prison myself and watching the same faces come and go, I'd have to agree.

For anyone new to the page, my name is Vincent.

Almost three years ago, I walked out of prison. And if I'm gonna compare myself to many others who've been released, I was lucky.

I had a family. A home. Didn't have to worry too much about money. I had a car. Most people will get out to FAR less.

Some walk out to homelessness. Some to boarding houses. Or couch surf. They have no transport, no support network and nobody waiting for them at the gate.

But somehow they're expected to rebuild their entire lives from scratch.

During my time inside, I spoke to countless men who had plans for when they got out. Men who were tired of this life, who genuinely wanted change.

They spoke about getting a job. Reconnecting with family. They just wanted a normal life. Then I'd see them come back...

Again. And again... and again. I remember thinking, "how many chances do these guys need??"

It wasn't until I was released myself that I truly understood.

How many times can someone hear 'no' before they stop asking? How many job applications can someone submit before they give up? How many closed doors can someone walk into before they start believing they're never getting through one?

Again, I was lucky. After months of applying and sitting unsuccessful interviews, I was like stuff it, I'll work for myself (though finding insurance nearly stopped me from doing this too!)

People like to get in the comments and say we should use our time wisely inside and complete the courses. Gain qualifications. Work on ourselves. Prepare for release.

Well one, don't get me started on the 'courses' available (or lack of), and two, what's the point if theres no opportunity waiting on the outside? What's the point of telling someone to change if every door remains shut once they do?

Because eventually, you can't help but start to feel that these are the cards you're dealt and nothing will ever change. And when that happens, prison starts looking really familiar again..

People say prison should be hard. The reality is that for some people, prison is easier than the alternative. Inside theres a bed. Food. Routine. Structure...

.. An IDENTITY. A SENSE OF BELONGING.

I know people inside who are eligible for parole RIGHT NOW but choose not to apply because they know they have nothing waiting for them on the outside. They know they will turn back to crime just to survive. How f*cked is that.

Now just over a year ago, two mates which I had met inside were released from prison. Both had spent most of their adult lives in and out of prison. Both were over it but just couldnt get anyone to give them a go.

Around the same time, I had a couple of mates who were looking for workers. I was a little reluctant to link them up, but you know what? They're both still working today. For both of them, this is the longest they've stayed out of prison in their adult lives.

Since starting InsideOut Pathways, we've seen this same thing happen over and over again.

Not because anyone was given a hand out, it was because they were given an opportunity.

And now after a rollercoaster year, what started as a post to help a few more people getting out, has grown into a registered charity.

Over the last year we've spoken with hundreds of people impacted by the justice system. We have also connected with employers, support services, community organisations, families and people who all believe that someone shouldn't be defined forever by the worst thing they've ever done.

We're not a job agency. People don't need to reach out to us. But they do. These are people who want to work. People who are trying. People who are doing everything they can to stay out of trouble and build a better life.

What they're missing is opportunity.

Today we have vetted candidates ready to work.

People with trade experience. Labouring experience. Warehouse experience. Hospitality experience. People with licences, tickets and skills.

So, my question to local businesses - Do you need workers?

Because we'd love to talk to you.

You might help someone keep a roof over their head.
You might help a parent provide for their children.
You might help break a cycle that has repeated itself for years.

And who knows?

The person you take a chance on might end up being one of your best employees.

And beyond helping one individual, you're helping build a safer community for all of us.

Every person who finds stable employment, keeps a roof over their head and stays connected to their family is one less person cycling back through the justice system.

After all, surely the goal isn't just to punish people... It's to stop them coming back...

If you're an employer and would like to explore giving someone a second chance, please fill out our employer expression of interest form:
https://forms.gle/zEfQApG4PTX8jQP59

If you're looking for work after prison, or know someone who is, complete our candidate form:
https://forms.gle/iBUDGi59pLxRGxpK9

Or feel free to reach out to us directly at
[email protected]

Let's create more success stories.

l&r
Vincent

"What does giving someone a second chance mean to you, if anything?"

This is one of the questions we ask employers who reach out to InsideOut Pathways looking to give someone as opportunity.

The following are answers which came from business owners. Employers. People who have staff to manage, wages to pay and business to run.

"Being a criminal doesn't determine someones ability to be a good person".

"A mistake is something you learn from, so why should it be held against you indefinitely?"

"Second chances are needed for people to learn and grow, because if they don't get opportunities they just go backwards again".

"Once upon a time someone gave me a second chance that enabled me to get to there I am today".

"A second chance for someone who is ready to change can be life-changing, not just for them, but for everyone around them".

"... and there's no such thing as rehabilitation without a second chance".

"Most people aren't where they are today because they never made mistakes".

Blown away by the responses we have received and would like to thank ALL employers who have reached out to us.

These employers who believe in second chances aren't people who think crime is okay. They are people who understand that human beings are CAPABLE of CHANGE.

If we genuinely believe people can change, then eventually we have to give them somewhere to prove it. Because every closed door, every rejected application, every employer who refuses to even have a convo sends a message.

A message I've had to battle myself just recently:

No matter how much better we do, it still won't be enough.

That sent me on a deep spiral. It's a dangerous place for someone to end up mentally. And for a lot of people, they stop believing in themselves. Stop applying for jobs. Stop putting themselves out there.

They stop BELIEVING there's any point TRYING!!

And when that happens, they often fall back on what they know. Why? Because they can't see another option!

Most people don't wake up wanting to fail. Or go backwards. Or return to prison. They want what everybody else wants.

A purpose. Something to lose. Something to protect.

Thats why employers are so important as they're often the difference between somebody moving forward and somebody giving up.

Right now, we have vetted candidates ready to work. People who have reached out to us. People who are ready to put in the work. They just need an employer whos open enough to have that conversation.

They need to that opportunity to prove themselves.

If you're an employer willing to have a conversation, we'd love to hear from you.

Employer EOI: https://forms.gle/zEfQApG4PTX8jQP59

Looking for work/support: https://forms.gle/iBUDGi59pLxRGxpK9

What do people genuinely think a second chance should look like?

Just wanted to apologise to all those who’ve been trying to reach out lately, especially through the IOP inbox.

The messages and emails have honestly gotten a bit out of control over the last couple of weeks and I just haven’t had the time or capacity to stay on top of everything properly.

Truth is I've had a lot going on behind the scenes lately. A few things happened recently that really knocked me (and my family) around a bit, and on top of that I had to make the decision to close my gym down.

Wasn't doing too well when a friend reminded me, “There’s a reason they tell you on a plane to put your own oxygen mask on first before helping others”.

That, and a phone call I received from inside, really helped me change my mindset.

Had a really good meeting with the IOP team today, and we’ve put some proper systems and structure in place so we can get back on top of everything and respond to people the way they absolutely deserve.

So grateful for the people around me right now who're helping carry this, especially during a time where I probably haven’t been carrying myself too well either. These guys deserve a lot more credit than they get.

To everyone who’s called, text or stopped by.. thank you! Really appreciate it. Really grateful.

Anyway, boo hoo, pity party over. Back to work... LFG!!!

l&r!!!
Vincent

This is probably not a subject I ever really wanted to write about.

It's a touchy one. A topic that instantly brings emotions out of people. And as uncomfortable as it is to speak about, this stuff is real.

Over the years, I had met many men inside who've had their lives completely destroyed because of lies, false allegations, manipulations and from partners weaponising systems during relationship breakdowns.

Now obviously, I'm not saying that every single person who says that is telling the truth.

I been around long enough to know there are genuine offenders and genuine victims too. But I also think people would be naive to believe that none of that happens either.

And since starting IOP, I've seen this issue very much goes both ways.

There have been just as many women reaching out sharing stories of being cut off from their kids, struggling financially through endless legal battles, emotionally broken from years of manipulation, or feeling like no one would believe them before the other person ran with the narrative first.

Now before anyone wants to have a go at me in the comments, I'm not saying this is a men vs women issue. It's a human issue.

And one of the saddest parts about all of it is the children caught in the middle.

Kids being used as leverage. Or punishment. Or bargaining chips between angry adults trying to hurt each other.

I've seen people lose access to their children before anything was even proven. I've seen them lose jobs, relationships, reputations and entire support networks almost overnight.

I have seen people spend years of their life and tens of thousands of dollars trying to defend themselves while carrying labels that society rarely removes, even if allegations later fall apart completely.

And people remember accusations..
They rarely remember outcomes.

I'm not dismissing genuine victims here.. there is so much abuse, violence and trauma that exists. There are also SO many genuine cases that go completely unreported or unsupported too, which is another issue all together.

But false allegations, manipulation and people weaponing systems exist as well. Pretending they don't doesnt help nobody.

I don't think people understand how often threats like:
"If you leave me, I'll ruin you"
is actually a reality for so many.

And unfortunately, by the time the truth finally comes out, the damage is already done.

Jobs gone.
Families broken.
Mental health destroyed.
Years of someones life stripped away.

I tried looking into the statistics around all of this and most studies seem to throw around figures like 2-10%.

Imagine if it was closer to 10%.

That would mean 100 people out of every 1000 having their lives torn apart for absolutely nothing. Even if it was 2%... That’s still 20 innocent people.

20 families. 20 lives. 20 people having to rebuild after something that never happened.

I have no idea what the answer is here. But acting like this never happens isn't going to help..

Would genuinely like to hear people's thoughts on this.

"What do you feel is currently the biggest thing stopping you from moving forward?"

We recently updated our IOP employment/support form and added this question. These are REAL answers from people who are trying to rebuild their lives after prison.

“Myself 100%.”
“Homelessness.”
“Fear of rejection.”
“No licence. No ID. No bank account. Don’t know what to do.”
“My criminal record.”
“Court and fear of going back inside.”
“Anxiety.”
“Confidence.”
“Support.”
“I can’t seem to find employment.”
“My police check.”
“Parole.”
“Relapse due to no structure and routine.”
“No transport.”
“Feeling lost and isolated.”
“Lack of opportunity due to criminal history.”
“Trying to stay away from old environments.”
“Self esteem and lack of confidence.”
“I am very lost and very isolated. I know I have more to offer life.”

These aren't people making excuses. These men and women reached out to us because they're TRYING to rebuild their lives.

Trying to find work. Trying to stay away from old environments. Trying to rebuild confidence. Trying to become functioning members of society again.

It's so easy to underestimate how hard it can be when every part of your life feels so unstable at once.

No licence, no housing, no confidence, no support network, no money. Just a criminal record that follows you into every opportunity you apply for.

And you wonder why some people lose hope.

But you know what, those answers show something else:
these guys HAVEN'T given up yet.

Despite everything listed above, these people still filled out a form asking for work, support and a chance to move their life forward.

We've had a large number of people reaching out lately genuinely wanting employment and a different direction in life, including women trying to rebuild after prison who just need someone to give them that opportunity.

So to employers reading this:
If you're willing to look at who somebody is NOW rather than who they used to be, we would genuinely love to hear from you.

Behind every one of those answers above is somebody who, deep down, still believes they have more to offer life.

Employers EOI
https://forms.gle/zEfQApG4PTX8jQP59

Job Seeker / Support Form
https://forms.gle/iBUDGi59pLxRGxpK9

If you've been in prison, caught up in the justice system, or your life has gone off track and you're genuinely trying to move in a different direction, reach out.

Our main focus here at IOP is to help people get back to work.
Working brings so much more than just money.

It brings routine. Purpose. Structure. Confidence. Something to get up for again.

Honestly, sometimes one opportunity is all it takes to completely change the direction of someone's life.

We already have employers reaching out who understand people have a past. Employers who are more interested in who someone is NOW, rather than only who they used to be.

Whether you need:
work,
support,
mentoring,
or if you just don’t know where to even start rebuilding anymore...

Reach out.

A lot of our team understand this life personally. We've lived it ourselves... or living it I should say, because many of us are still dealing with the roadblocks that come with trying to rebuild after prison.

But we also know things CAN get better. We have seen lives change once people get around the right environment, routine and opportunities.

So if you're sitting there feeling like your life has gone too far off track, or feeling like nobody is ever going to give you a real shot again... don't go disappearing back into old environments thinking that's your only option.

There are people out here who genuinely want to see you WIN. Get in touch. Fill out the Job Seeker form below ⬇️

Job Seeker / Support Form
https://forms.gle/iBUDGi59pLxRGxpK9

Employers EOI
https://forms.gle/zEfQApG4PTX8jQP59