Stanja Buvac

Sometimes the size of our reaction doesn’t seem to match what’s actually happening.

Someone makes a comment and you can’t stop thinking about it.
A small disagreement leaves you upset for hours.
Someone doesn’t reply and your mind immediately starts creating a story around it.

Our first instinct can be to focus on the reaction itself:

Why am I reacting like this?
Why can’t I just let it go?

But the reaction may be giving you useful information.
Next time you notice one, try these three questions before immediately trying to change it:

1. What actually happened and what did I make it mean?
Separate the event from your interpretation of it. They haven’t replied is different from they’re ignoring me because I’ve done something wrong.

2. What feels familiar about this?
Have you felt this same frustration, fear, anger or need to withdraw in other situations? Sometimes today’s reaction belongs to a pattern that’s been around much longer than today’s event.

3. What am I needing right now?
A boundary? Reassurance? Space? More information? A conversation? Time before responding? Understanding the need underneath the reaction can help you decide what to actually do next.

You don’t have to analyse every emotion you have.
But when the same reaction keeps appearing, getting curious about it can tell you far more than simply trying to make it disappear.

Sometimes the reaction isn’t the problem to solve.
It’s information that can help you understand the problem better.

Save these three questions for the next time something gets under your skin. ✨

If your body is tired but your mind won’t stop, this evening was created for you.

Rest isn’t always something we can access simply because we’ve decided it’s time to relax.

When you’ve spent the whole day thinking, doing, responding and moving from one thing to the next, the transition into rest can take time.
So rather than expecting you to suddenly switch off, I guide you there gradually.

We move from the body, to the breath, to the quieter layers of the mind.

First, the body.
Gentle restorative practice helps release some of the physical tension you’ve been carrying.

Then, the breath.
I guide you through breathing practices designed to gradually slow things down and help your system settle.

Then, the quieter layers of the mind.
Once less is being asked of your body and your breathing has softened, you can receive the vibrations and sounds of the crystal singing bowls from a very different place.

The intention is for you to leave feeling rested, restored, clearer in your mind and lighter in your body.

🌿 Restorative Breathwork & Sound Healing
📅 Thursday 3 September
🕡 7 pm
📍 River Canoe Club, Marrickville

Only 1 place remains and Early Bird closes tonight.

If you’ve been thinking about joining us, this is the time.

✨ Link in bio to reserve your place.

You can sleep through the night and still wake up feeling like you haven’t properly recovered.
Sleep is essential, but it isn’t the only form of rest your body needs.

Think about the difference:

Sleep is something your body does naturally.
Physical rest reduces the demands you’re placing on your body: sitting down, lying down, stopping activity.

Deliberate down-regulation goes another step further.
You intentionally reduce some of the stimulation and activation your system has been carrying throughout the day.
And you don’t have to wait until bedtime to do it.

Try this for 5 minutes today:

Lie down somewhere comfortable.
Put the phone away.
Let your eyes close.

Notice where your body is still holding effort —> jaw, shoulders, hands, belly.
Let your breathing gradually become slower, without forcing it.
And make your exhale a little longer than your inhale if that feels comfortable.

Then stay there.
No podcast. No scrolling. No trying to achieve anything.

Five minutes won’t replace good sleep.
But it gives your body something sleep alone can’t always provide:
a deliberate transition from doing to resting.

And the more often you practise that transition, the easier it becomes to settle, release accumulated tension and recover from the demands of your day.

Try it today and notice how you feel afterwards. 🌿

What I keep noticing in conversations with women around me is how much frustration comes from comparing their body now with the body they had five or ten years ago and wishing it is the same.

As you know, perimenopause and menopause bring hormonal changes that can affect sleep, energy, mood, stress response and recovery.

So rather than expecting your body to keep operating by the same rules, here are three things worth reconsidering and what I recommend to my clients:

1. Stop making sleep responsible for all your recovery.
If you’re waking during the night or not feeling restored in the morning, waiting until bedtime to rest may not be enough. Try adding 10–15 minutes during the day where you’re genuinely not consuming or producing anything, no phone, emails, podcast or multitasking. Lie down, close your eyes, breathe comfortably and give your system less to process.

2. Check your capacity before deciding how you’re going to move.
Before exercising, take 30 seconds and notice: How is my energy? How did I sleep? How does my body actually feel today? Then adjust. That might mean strength or something more active one day, and slower movement, walking or restorative practice another. Consistency doesn’t have to mean doing the same thing at the same intensity.

3. Start planning around your energy, not only your diary.
Notice when your energy is generally better and when it tends to drop. Where possible, put demanding tasks into your better windows and stop filling every lower-energy space with something productive. Your calendar tells you what you have time for; your body tells you whether you have capacity for it.

You don’t need to overhaul your whole life.
Start by noticing where you’re still expecting today’s body to live by yesterday’s rules.

Your body is changing. The way you support it may need to change too. 💖

Save this and try one of these this week.✨

When something is bothering us, the mind can become very good at going around the same problem from twenty different directions.

More analysing. More scenarios. More “but what if…”
And somehow, still no clearer.

When you notice yourself doing this, instead of looking for another answer, try changing the question.

1. What do I actually know to be true right now?
This helps separate what has actually happened from everything your mind is predicting, assuming or filling in.

2. What am I trying to control that isn’t actually mine to control?
Another person’s response? The outcome? Something that hasn’t happened yet?
Notice where your energy is going.

3. What needs my attention right now, not tomorrow, not next week, right now?
This brings a big problem back to the part you can actually respond to.

You may not suddenly have the whole answer but you might have enough clarity to know your next step.
And sometimes, that’s all you need.

Save these three questions for the next time your mind gets stuck in a loop. ✨

You know you need to slow down.
You’ve probably known for a while but there’s always something that needs doing first.

Work. Family. The house.
That email you haven’t answered.

And somehow rest keeps getting moved to later.

The problem with waiting until life becomes less busy is that there will almost always be something else competing for your time.

Sometimes intention isn’t enough. You have to deliberately create the conditions for rest.

That might mean putting your phone away for half an hour.
Leaving one evening unscheduled.
Going to bed earlier.

Or actually putting rest in your calendar and treating that time with the same importance as everything else you show up for.

So, if you’ve been saying “I really need to slow down”, here’s an opportunity to actually do it.

🌿 Restorative Breathwork & Sound Healing
📅 Thursday 3 September
🕡 7 pm
📍 River Canoe Club, Marrickville

An evening after work to slow your breathing, release accumulated tension, quiet your mind and give your whole system time to settle.

One week of Early Bird remaining and a few spots left.
✨ Link in bio to reserve your place.

This weekend I’m in my final in-person training block for the year.
Long days. Lots of learning. Lots to take in.

Years ago, being committed would have meant squeezing everything possible into the day and resting once it was all over.
These days, I do things differently.

When life gets particularly full,
there are three things I deliberately protect:

1. Proper food.
Not eating on the run or forgetting until I’m starving. My body needs fuel for everything I’m asking of it.

2. Small pockets of nothing.
Even ten quiet minutes between things without filling the space with my phone, emails or another task.

3. An earlier finish.
Whatever can wait until tomorrow, waits.
Recovery gets a place in the day rather than whatever time happens to be left over.

Busy periods don’t require us to abandon the things that support us.
In fact, that’s often when we need them most.

That’s something I’ve had to learn and continue to practise.

What’s one thing you protect when life gets particularly full? ✨

You finally sit down after a long day.

Your body is still, but your mind is going through tomorrow’s list.
You’re watching something, but checking your phone at the same time.
You go to bed tired, but it takes ages to actually settle.

Stopping activity and experiencing rest aren’t always the same thing.

One gives your body a break from doing.
The other allows your whole system to begin slowing down.

So how can you tell the difference?

Next time you take a break, notice:

Is your breathing becoming slower and easier?
Is some of the tension leaving your jaw, shoulders or belly?
Is your mind gradually becoming quieter?

You don’t need all three to happen. But if you’re physically still while everything inside you continues at the same speed, you may have stopped doing without really beginning to rest.

Try giving yourself five minutes without adding more stimulation.

No phone. No TV. Nothing to achieve.

Sit somewhere comfortable, let your eyes rest on something pleasant and allow your exhale to become a little longer.
Then notice what changes.

Rest isn’t only about what you stop doing. It’s also about what begins to settle when you stop. ✨

Today marks three years since my mum passed away unexpectedly.

She was a journalist and an incredible reader. Books were everywhere.

Conversations around our kitchen table from as early as I can remember often revolved around people, history, art, psychology and why humans do what they do.

One lesson she taught me has stayed with me ever since.
Whenever someone reacted in a way that didn’t make sense, she rarely asked:
“What’s wrong with them?”
She’d ask:
“I wonder why they’re reacting like that.”

At the time, I had no idea that such a simple question would shape the way I see people, and eventually the work I do today.

Over the years, I’ve realised it’s also one of the most helpful questions we can ask ourselves.
Instead of asking,
“Why do I keep doing this?”
try asking,
“I wonder why this reaction makes sense.”

That small shift changes everything.

It moves us from judgement to curiosity.
And from curiosity comes understanding and it helps us work with ourselves instead of against ourselves.

I’ve spent years studying Yoga, Breathwork, Neuroscience and Systemic Constellations, etc. yet one of the greatest lessons came long before any formal training.
It came from my mum.

Three years on, I still hear her question in my mind and it continues to shape the way I see people, the way I teach, and the way I live.
Because the goal isn’t becoming someone else.
It’s making more sense of the person you already are.

❤️ Miss you Mum.

We’ve become very good at taking breaks.

Watching Netflix.
Scrolling on our phones.
Going away for a weekend.

But many finish those things feeling just as mentally busy as when they started because taking a break isn’t the same as deep rest.

Rest is a state your body experiences.

And like anything else, the more often you experience it, the more opportunity you give your body to repair, recalibrate and settle.

That’s why I’m creating evenings like this.

An opportunity to experience a different pace.
A chance to slow your breathing.
Release physical tension.
Settle your mind.

And welcome spring feeling recharged, restored and ready for the season ahead.

🌿 Restorative Breathwork & Sound Healing

📅 Thursday 3 September
🕡 6:30 pm
📍 River Canoe Club, Marrickville

The perfect way to finish the working week and welcome spring.

Early Bird bookings are now open.

✨ Link in bio to book.