Shirley-Moana Coach

I'm spilling the TEA on three strategies you can use to help identify and challenge those pesky negative thoughts that have been following you round like a bad smell, which in turn can help change unhelpful behaviours and unwanted emotional responses.

TEA stands for Thoughts, Emotions, Actions. ☕️🧠💛💪 and each of these is connected.

For example, lets say you're trying to lose weight and you eat a donut (eek!). You may have THOUGHTS of 'I have no self-control' or 'I am weak' which leads to EMOTIONS of guilt, shame and frustration, which then causes you to ACT by giving up and eating more unhealthy food which leads to more thoughts, more emotions and more actions and the cycle continues ....

By using the TEA framework you can interrupt the cycle at 3 different places.

1️⃣ You can catch the negative THOUGHT and swap it for something more constructive like 'one donut doesn't define my progress' or 'I can enjoy a treat and still stay on track.' 💪

2️⃣ You can change your EMOTIONAL response by recognising the emotion and identifying what its trying to tell you (e.g. I feel frustrated because I think this is a goal I care about) which can shift your emotional response to understanding, self compassion and a determination to improve. 💖

3️⃣ You can change the ACTIONS by shopping at the store with the delicious healthier treats and buying some for when you need them 🚨🍏 and staying away from the store with the delicious donuts 🍩🤤

Or ... maybe you catch yourself having THOUGHTS of "I'm not worthy of love" or "No one will ever love me," which leads to EMOTIONS of sadness, loneliness, and despair, which then causes you to ACT by withdrawing from social situations or pushing people away. This leads to more thoughts, more emotions, and more actions, and the cycle continues ...

By using the TEA framework you can:

THOUGHT: Swap the thought or better still Challenge the s**t out of that thought and find evidence to the contrary (Is this thought true? I have good qualities. People say they love me). 💭

EMOTIONS: Shift the emotional response by being Curious about what the emotion is trying to tell you (I feel sadness because I value connection). ❓

ACTIONS: Change the actions by reaching out to a friend, meeting a family member for dinner and/or widen your social connections by joining a club you're interested in. ☕🎬

While these strategies can be incredibly effective, its not always easy. Changing long-standing thought patterns and actions takes time, effort, and practice ⏳💪. But don't get discouraged! Persistence and practise can lead to significant improvements in your mental health and overall wellbeing. Remember, every small step forward is progress! 🌱✨

THE CHALLENGE: Put your detective 🕵️ badge on and choose one small negative thought you have about yourself. Use your detective skills to interrogate the truthfulness of that thought and use the TEA framework to help you replace the Thought, Emotions, Actions with something more productive. 🎉 🏆

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