08/26/2026
I’d like to take a moment to share a letter I received back in 2001. Over the past few months, I've been reflecting on my martial arts journey—the ups, the downs, the victories, and the challenges. It’s been a deeply personal experience that has shaped me in ways I never expected.
Professionally, my greatest successes have not come from awards or accolades, but from the unwavering support of my parents and the incredible students who believe in what I do. Your trust and commitment have made all the difference. You are the reason I continue to strive and grow, not just as a martial artist, but as a person.
Through it all, I've come to realize that my true purpose is clear: to serve. To serve my students, my community, and this art that has given me so much. I am deeply grateful for the opportunity to make a positive impact in the lives of others, and I’m excited for the future as we continue this journey together.
December 2001
Dear Sensei Clayton,
Thank you for saving my son’s life.
You may not have pulled him from a burning inferno, nor plucked him from the deep dark waters, but you did save his life.
I am certain of it.
My son’s story begins many years ago, long before you met him. He had been troubled for most of these years for various reasons, most of them beyond his control. By the age of six, he was having behavioural problems at his day care eventually resulting in expulsion. He had been sent to the school principal’s office several times for class disruption, and his behaviour at home was difficult and at times, out of control. By the age of seven he had threatened su***de a few times. The household knives and scissors had to be hidden, he was placed on constant surveillance at school with heightened vigilance while on sidewalks for fear he would purposely run out into on-coming traffic. He said he was sad, he had no self worth and didn’t see any hope for the future. He felt he and everyone else would be better off if he were dead.
As parents, we are always concerned for the safety of our children. The stories we hear of child abduction and abuse are frightening, so we educate ourselves, and our children about not talking to strangers, fire safety, earthquake awareness, etc… to keep them safe.
But how do you protect a child who wants to harm himself?
As a mother, I wanted to help him, but no matter how much I tried to make him feel better about himself, I couldn’t get through. His self worth had to come from within himself.
The school counsellor suggested I seek professional help. After two visits to a child psychiatrist, in which he was subjected to painfully embarrassing questions regarding toilet training and bed-wetting, he sunk to an even deeper depression, his low self-esteem fuelled further by being treated like a social misfit and freak.
Anger management classes were next on the agenda, but were met with very limited success. These classes focus on children who are angry at the world, but offered little help or strategies to support a child who is angry with himself.
When mentioning my frustration to a friend, she suggested we try karate. She told me how her son and other children in the neighbourhood had been helped by coming to you at the Canadian Martial Arts Academy. I was reluctant at first and worried that this might encourage further aggressive outbursts. But, after yet another phone call from the principal and a one-day suspension from school, I made an appointment to meet you with my son, and discuss the possibility of joining your school. With all agreeing, you outfitted him with his first gi and white belt.
From that moment on, his transformation began. He was excited about something for the first time in a long time. He worked hard and was encouraged by all the dojo staff. We immediately felt immersed in the Canadian Martial Arts Academy family. We have met so many wonderful people and have developed lasting friendships.
But we have gained much more. With each belt achieved, my son’s feelings of pride and accomplishment have grown. His mood has gradually improved and no longer does he express feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness. His grades at school have improved, but more importantly, his attitude towards himself and others changed. He learned about self-respect, motivation, challenges and how good it felt to reach goals. He has learned how to lose games graciously and no longer views this as a personal failure. He has learned how to put things into perspective and is not so likely to “sweat the small stuff”. He has gradually been able to take better control of his emotions, by talking about his feelings an expressing his emotions in a more positive and productive way. He is now a brown belt working toward his black and although the colours around his waist grow darker, the weight around his heart grows lighter.
He has achieved this through his hard work and your continued patience, understanding and dedication to his growth. The hard/soft system of Goju-Ryu you teach goes well beyond the physical techniques. You have also used a hard/soft style in your teaching methods to motivate and guide each individual student. Your uncanny ability to know when and how hard to push a student to achieve their maximum potential while wisely understanding when that same pupil also requires soft words of encouragement, a joke, handshake or simple pat on the back, has exemplified all what a Sensei is. In the words of Bob Dagleish, “The sensei must flow through the student in many levels of communication and reach to the far corners of the student’s life. A Sensei is a father, at times a mother, and advisor and a chastiser.”
For my son, you encompass ALL what a Sensei is.
Although he still shies away from competitions and tournaments, and while he may not display some of the natural affinity and talent other students possess, this is not what karate has been about for him. Karate has taken him on a journey that has reclaimed his self worth, esteem and confidence. Karate has given my son back his life.
It has taken me a long time to write this letter and may come as a surprise to you. I would have told you in person how much you have helped us, but I feared I would break down and cry (as I am now) and embarrass both of us. So, I hope my written words will suffice and be able to convey my deepest and most genuine gratitude and affection.
I don’t know what else to say except Thank-you, What does one say when they have saved a loved one’s life?
…and you did save his life.
I am certain of it.
Forever grateful,
Gail.