15/09/2022
ā ļøStop telling woman they will bounce backā ļø
I remember when I was pregnant i couldnāt wait to give birth. As mad as it sounds I was excited to go through labour.
Unfortunately for me, as with any birth. It didnāt go that way. I was told when I was a week overdue that Olivia was ātoo bigā and I was given a meeting with the consultant who gave me a list of pros & cons and ultimately I made the hard decision to opt for a section.
This was truly the hardest choice Iāve ever had to make as I was so looking forward to labour, however hearing the words, sometimes the babies collar bone can break I knew I couldnāt risk that happening.
So my dream wasnāt to be.
When she was born it was just perfect, the room was silent, Olivia didnāt even cry. She was on my chest and the rest I didnāt even realise was happening. Everything was so calm.
I felt no pain, until I was back in recovery. And it hit me big time.
I couldnāt feel my legs, I couldnāt even sit up.
Basically, every image I had of these moments were different and I was okay with it. I had my baby and that was all I ever wanted.
In the hours and days that followed it really hit me just how much I couldnāt do, I could barely walk, I couldnāt dress myself, all I was good for was pretty much sitting watching my baby and feeding her. I am always so grateful that I had Jonny looking after me & Olivia from the moment she was born.
I remember a few weeks after her birth I managed to pick her up & walk through to my kitchen with her, and I felt like I had achieved so much.
Itās taken me until now to be fully able to be back to how able I was to move & do things.
So there was absolutely no bounce back for me, in fact it was the total opposite.
I have a scar, I have insane amount of stretch marks & i am just learning to be functional again.
The reason Iām sharing this, is so others who have felt the same know they are not alone, and what we see on Instagram of mums post birth isnāt always the case, that infact for many of us, we are just going day by day with a new body that we donāt recognise but yet we are so thankful for.
Again, we donāt bounce back, we grow š»