Hack the Body, Hack the Mind

1 week out from my first bodybuilding comp.

I’ll give the data first and then I’ll give my reflections.

Here’s the numbers
This prep has been a 22 week prep once I step on stage. And I started the first week of January

There has been 18 weeks of active dieting, 3 diet break weeks. 1 being a mock peak week where I trialled food and what I can’t handle, 1 being a holiday, 1 being after my powerlifting competition.

This mornings weigh in: 81:3kg
My weigh in on the 5th of Jan: 97.9kg
Total weight lost: 16.6kg

Current step count: 15,000
Current calories:
Training days : Calories 1936. Protein 230g. Carbs 180g. Fats 34g.
Non training days: Calories 1777. Protein 230g. Carbs 140. Fats 34g.

I have 3/4 more days of active dieting to go before a steady linear load until I find the look I like.

Reflections:
Bodybuilding is a display of discipline as much as display of muscularity. At times I’ve wanted to quit, and at times I wondered if the sacrifices were worth it. It’s made everything harder, brain fog was tough, the dragging my feet on the same loop I’d walk over and over again, having people ask me if I’m ill, the struggles to stay present in life and relationships. It’s been hard.

There is a numbness that occurs through the dieting. Your food is low, your steps are high, training is just as hard and normal life continues. So you tap into the part of you that can suffer and get to the next meal or the next workout or the next cup of decaf tea.

It’s been really hard to explain that the rewards are in the suffering. From the outside it’s shredded physiques. But the personal battle for me has been about chasing a dream that I’ve wanted since I was 18.

The main takeaway: Don’t ever let anyone stop you from being you.

I’ve struggled, and loved every minute of it.
I’ve proved to myself I can be dedicated and fully commit to a pursuit.

The goal for this final stretch has been to be extremely present with my friends and family. There is no point achieving anything without a hug at the end and sharing the experience with the people that matter.

A few more weeks of seeing me in my pants I’m afraid team so bare with lol.

As always… Do The Work

You can handle more than you think.

I think going through painful events can make you stronger than those who have never been through anything. I call it the price of privilege.

The price of privilege is that someone who has everything given to them and the “perfect life” cannot handle the smallest of things.

People who haven’t been through anything tough crumble under pressure.

I used to ask “why me” when things went dreadfully wrong. “Why has this happened to me” “give me a break” but I had to learn to draw positives from negatives.

If I am suffering now. I am pain free later.

Pay the debt.
Choose to do something hard.
Do the work.

All man are the same except for their belief in their own selves, regardless of what others may think of them
- Miyamoto Musashi

A few from today’s push session.

Less than 2 weeks to go… we’re literally cooking 🤣

My weekly recap and reflection:

Monday started strong with me and .rose.candy watching - it was beautiful to get a pho and spend some quality time together.

Tuesday saw my last low day and the best look I’d seen all prep

Wednesday - Friday: the carb load was intresting, seeing the body go from flat to tight to spilled was a tough one. I needed to see the amount of carbs I could handle and I needed to see what body weight I’ll end up at. It’s a strange feeling chasing the scales and wanting them to go down every week for months, only to see them have to come back up.

I monitored my food, my salt intake on each meal, my fluid intake with each meal and between each meal. I posed 3-6x per day and learnt a lot about the sacrifice of size for conditioning or conditioning for size. This becomes more apparent when you aren’t shredded to the bone.

It’s dawned on me that knowing what I know now, I’d say I’m 8 weeks away from an unbelievable look on stage, but this prep being my first and being as long and tough as it’s been, I’m happy to be stepping on stage in 2 weeks with what I’ve managed to achieve.

I’ve heard a lot of people say your first prep is your hardest, and I certainly would change a lot about my starting position for next time. I’d start leaner, I’d plan better, I’d give myself more time and step on stage when I was ready. 9 days of dieting ahead of me to create some new lines.

This weekend, well it’s been amazing, suns out, wholesome walks, pub gardens with live music, the most normal weekend we’ve had in a while…. Apart from a slight meltdown that my chicken salad was covered in oil… but we learn haha.

Roll on the next 2 weeks! I’m here to enjoy it and experience it all.

Thank you once again .rose.candy for all you do.

As always… Do The Work

IDC, I’m proud of myself.

Upping carbs tomorrow and gunna fill this out to see where im truly at. My body needs a rest, then the final push to the show.

Less than 3 weeks.

What a journey this has been.

A new low and the same reminder… stay consistent and don’t panic.