Blackwater F.C Vets

Apologies for the delay, but…… after popular demand,

Match Report: Blackwater Vets vs Burridge AFC
Sunday 5th October 2025 — County Cup, Round 1

Blackwater Vets arrived for their first County Cup fixture of the season, proudly undefeated and full of belief. The visitors, Portsmouth-based Burridge AFC, made the two-hour journey north and, to their credit, brought a sizeable travelling fan base.
As ever, the pre-match build-up was far from smooth. The warm-up was delayed by the late arrival of club owner Craig and club manager Glenn, a now familiar ritual.

Unfortunately for Glenn, the headlines surrounding him continue to grow. The club’s media department (Stephen) is reporting that the manager faces a scandal of Allardycean proportions, following allegations of a Ponzi-style scheme involving player investments in “performance socks.” Eyewitnesses claim Glenn was later spotted in Primark, purchasing designer bags instead.
The board are said to be “monitoring the situation closely.”
The pressure appears to be taking its toll; the once youthful manager now sporting the weary look of a man in his sixties. Perhaps it’s time for Blackwater’s leadership to delegate key responsibilities to players: someone to chase subs, someone to clean the kits, a ball officer, and of course, a full-time social media rep (one not holding a flag on the touchline).

Starting Line-up Craig (GK), Tony, John, Dean, Peter (RB), Luke (LB), Sam B, Sam W, Mason, Ed, John 2 (ST).

With the nets erected moments before kick-off, the match began in typical Blackwater fashion, slightly chaotic, highly entertaining.
Peter caused early panic in the box with a thunderous throw-in, while Big Sam somehow managed to blast over from three yards. Small Sam displayed trademark composure with neat footwork, and Luke dazzled with ball control reminiscent of Kanu in his pomp.
Against the run of play, Burridge took the lead, with question marks once again over Blackwater’s new formation. Much like Manchester United, the problem may not be the players… but the system.
A delicious through ball from Big Sam found John 2, who was narrowly beaten to it by the keeper. Ed then had a sight of goal but sent his effort skyward, somewhere into Hampshire.
The right flank was looking increasingly exposed… again, the cost of the formation. But salvation arrived when Luke was brought down in the box. Penalty! Sam stepped up with confidence and slotted coolly into the bottom corner. 1–1.
Moments later, chaos in the Blackwater box saw John’s headed clearance fall to an opposition striker… but Tony threw himself into a last-ditch challenge that saved what looked a certain goal. Heroic defending.
A routine free kick for Blackwater turned dangerous when Peter’s inch-perfect delivery floated into a deadly area, begging for a finishing touch. None came, but the intent was there. Minutes later, Peter was clattered and let out a noise so dramatic the crowd feared a broken leg, only for him to spring up seconds later, free kick won.
Then controversy. Craig and John sandwiched an opposition player in a challenge that could only be described as 50-50-50. Craig, already riled up, was shown red after allegedly calling someone a “f***ing prick.” Whether this was the referee, the player, or himself remains unclear. Down to ten men, and Burridge converted the resulting penalty. 2–1 Burridge.
With Blackwater reeling, Peter, the right-back with a warrior’s heart, made a decision that will be remembered in club folklore. Volunteering to step into the unfamiliar role of goalkeeper, he pulled on Craig’s gloves and took his place between the sticks. What followed was nothing short of extraordinary. Peter, with no prior experience in goal, produced a commanding performance, barking orders at his defence and diving bravely at the feet of Burridge attackers. His reflexes thwarted two close-range efforts, and a fingertip save on a curling shot left the travelling fans stunned. His presence restored belief, but it now raises serious questions for Blackwater’s management: does Peter’s heroics in goal warrant a rethink of the goalkeeping position for the games ahead, or will Craig reclaim his spot once the suspension lifts?
Despite the chaos, Blackwater never die wondering. Big Sam threaded a pass to Luke, who chipped over the advancing keeper. It bounced agonisingly slow across the line, with John 2 sliding in for the finishing touch. VAR (i.e., bystanders) confirmed Luke’s goal had already crossed the line. 2–2.
At this point, Mason’s performance was masterful, crunching tackles, flawless timing, and winning everything in the air. His composure at the back kept the Vets alive. Big Sam continued pulling strings, sliding defence-splitting passes that somehow went unrewarded.
The second half began with Luke tormenting the opposition defence again. Big Sam found himself one-on-one with the keeper, who produced a world-class save. From the ensuing corner, Luke whipped in a beauty, Mason met it with power, but it soared just over.
Then disaster. Burridge unleashed a long-range screamer into the top corner. 3–2 Burridge.
With the side down to ten and trailing, stand-in manager/goalkeeper Craig (now spectating after his red card) made changes: John 2 off for Aaron, who’d scored on debut two games prior; Ed replaced by content creator turned supersub Stephen Strang.
And within minutes, magic. Luke, once again the tormentor, displayed sublime control before threading a pass through the defence that kissed the inside of the post and went in. 3–3! The crowd roared. Blackwater weren’t just alive… they were growing stronger.
Tom replaced Tony, adding much-needed energy to the backline. John marshalled the defence like a man possessed, while Dean threw himself into every challenge, ensuring no easy path through. Mason, still immense, continued timing tackles to perfection and sweeping up danger like a seasoned pro.
The visitors came close again, with the same player nearly replicating his earlier wondergoal, but fortune—and Peter’s commanding presence in goal—favoured the brave.
Then came the big one. Manager Glenn turned to crowd favourite Dave Armour Pro, amid rumours of a potential move to local rivals Woking (who can apparently offer more minutes up front). Perhaps that explains his substitution up front rather than in defence.
And what a decision it turned out to be. In the 89th minute, Dave fed Big Sam through on goal. Sam, ice-cold, waited for the keeper to move before rifling home. 4–3 Blackwater. The comeback was complete! Players, substitutes, and possibly even Glenn’s investment fund mobbed Sam in celebration. The final minutes saw Burridge launch every ball forward, even their keeper was stationed on the halfway line, but the Vets stood firm, with Peter’s commanding shouts and a crucial late catch under pressure sealing the defence.
Then, the whistle. Full time.
From one-nil down, then ten men, to winning in the dying seconds, this was nothing short of legendary. A comeback for the ages.
Every player was immense, but while Luke, Mason, and Peter’s heroics in goal produced standout performances, Man of the Match could only go to Big Sam, two goals, endless graft, and a presence that terrified the opposition. Burridge players could be heard muttering, “We know who they’re aiming for,” every time he rose for a header.
As for Burridge… sympathy must be extended. A two-hour trip, no changing rooms, no toilets, nets up minutes before kick-off, a one-goal lead, and a man advantage, only to lose in the 89th minute. Heartbreak for them. Ecstasy for Blackwater.
Blackwater march on, still undefeated, and into the next round of the County Cup. Yet, as the dust settles, all eyes are on the goalkeeping conundrum: will Peter’s unexpected brilliance force a selection headache for Glenn and the board?

*Match Report: Blackwater Vets vs Farnham Town Wanderers
Sunday 28th September*

Crisp weather set the scene for Blackwater’s latest clash, with changing rooms still out of action. That meant players had to get ready in front of what was Blackwater’s biggest crowd of the season, something that drew murmurs of discontent from the visitors.

Drama struck early when the referee failed to appear, leaving club manager Glenn to don the whistle.
His trademark positive spirit wasn’t quite what Farnham Town Wanderers had hoped for, but it was what they got.

Warming up without footballs was less than ideal, and starting the game without one proved even trickier. Luckily, the opposition eventually provided a suitable match ball and play was underway.

Starting XI:
Craig (GK), Dave (RB), Mason (CB), John (CB), Pete (LB), Sam B & Sam W (CM), Ed McCormack (CAM), Kaine (RW), Luke (LW), Joe (ST).

Pete’s second-ever start for the club was met with excitement from the Blackwater faithful, he seems to have gone down a treat with the fans, possibly even attracting a new following to the team.

The only sour note came pre-kickoff: club content creator Stephen was tasked with running the line instead of chronicling events. For a club of this stature, it’s surely a matter for management to resolve, his creative role is too crucial to be compromised.

From the off, Blackwater dominated. Farnham were left chasing scraps while Craig, between the sticks, channelled his inner Monk from Mean Machine. His distribution became a constant source of danger, and it was from one of his booming assists that the breakthrough arrived.

Craig launched the ball forward, serving it on a plate for Kaine. Kaine couldn’t quite tuck in, but the rebound fell kindly for Ed McCormack. Like Oliver Twist, Ed didn’t hesitate, gobble, gobble, gobble. 1-0 Blackwater.

Luke impressed down the left, terrorising the defence with his corners, throw-ins, and even a dangerous free kick from out wide. Big Sam nearly doubled the lead with a bullet header destined for the bottom corner, only to be denied by an inspired save.

Against the run of play, Farnham somehow scrambled an equaliser. The moment was so scrappy even this reporter can’t recall the exact sequence, but it was 1-1 nonetheless.

Pete continued his strong form, though much of this writer’s attention was (unfortunately) focused on the left flank while running the line.

Half-time: 1-1. Blackwater had every reason to be the happier side.

Stand-in manager Carlos kept faith with his men into the second half, and they rewarded him by playing their best football of the season in the opening 10 minutes. As legs began to tire, changes were made: Dave off, Dean on, John shifting to right-back, and Dean slotting in alongside Mason.

The game dipped until fresh subs arrived, Steve and debutant John 2. Unfortunately, the switch backfired almost instantly, with Farnham pouncing to take a 2-1 lead.

Blackwater, as ever, refused to fold. Samuel W threaded a through-ball to Stephen, who fluffed his lines. Redemption followed, however, when Blackwater won a penalty. Captain Joe stepped up with authority….. no mistake, 2-2.

Moments later, Joe bulldozed his way down the right, cut inside, and squared the ball to Stephen. Surely he wouldn’t miss again? He did. Over the bar. Still 2-2.

Meanwhile, Mason found himself debating with ref/manager Glenn about his physical “unitness” being an unfair aerial advantage. The outcome of the dispute remains shrouded in mystery.

It was worrying news for Blackwater fans when, in the 80th minute, club superstar Joe took a heavy knock inside the opposition penalty area, forcing play to a halt. He was eventually withdrawn, and surely an incident like this can only be something serious that threatens to sideline him for months. It is, of course, highly unlikely to be anything as trivial or wimpish as a bruised ankle… but only time will tell.

Full-time: 2-2.

Blackwater remain unbeaten after three league matches, sitting second in the table. Hopes of promotion and an invincible season are still alive, and this spirited performance against tough opposition leaves the team full of confidence heading into their next cup tie this Sunday at home against AFC Burridge from the South Coast.

Kick off 10:30am

Farnham Road Recreation Ground
Crondall
GU10 5PQ

If you fancy fresh air the morning after the night before.

Afternoon,

We are still on the lookout for a couple more players to finalise our squad for next season.

If you are over 35, like a beer (one babe, just going for one) can almost kick with both feet and love football then please do get in touch.

Many shanks, see what I did there.

Glenn - Manager

And so our second season as a club draws to an end, with some highs, and some lows, but most importantly a good squad who play for each other!

Myself, Craig and Darren would like to thanks the players for their hard work, and anyone who came to watch us throughout the season.

We go again next season, and we will be looking for additional players to strengthen our squad. If you would like to join Blackwater F.C Vets the please send a message to the page or to Glenn McCormack. The only stipulation is you need to be 35 or over before the season starts in September, and ideally kick with both feet!!!!

We play in the Farnham & District Sunday Vets League

If you know anyone who would be interested please let them know.

Please also share this post to help generate some traction.

Thank you,

The Gaffer.

Huge congratulations to our squad member Justin Wheatley who ran the London Marathon today, well done mate.

Blackwater F.C vs Farnham town Mavericks Sunday 17th November.
Another great game for the boys today in the invitation cup round 2.
Blackwater 7 - 0 Farnham

Match report by our very own Stephen Strang…..

*Blackwater Vets March Into Round 3 of the Prestigious Invitational Cup with Dominant Display*

On a Sunday morning when much of the world wrestled with the eternal roast dinner debate—beef or chicken—16 warriors from the Surrey region awoke with loftier aspirations: conquering the second round of the Invitational Cup. A trophy so storied, so illustrious, that it exists primarily in the dreams of those brave enough to play football on a cold, muddy Sunday morning.

The Blackwater Vets, dressed in their battle-hardened yellow kit, made the now-iconic march from the modest recreation ground changing rooms to the hallowed pitch, only to be greeted by crisis. Their pre-appointed referee had vanished like a figment of VAR controversy. But behind-the-scenes magic by the Blackwater management team conjured a replacement at the eleventh hour. Remarkably, this emergency whistleblower turned out to deliver a refereeing masterclass, raising suspicions he might moonlight in the Premier League.

*The Lineup: Legends in the Making*

Blackwater Vets lined up with the formidable Jonty—the reigning 23/24 Goalkeeper of the Season—between the sticks. A resolute back four of John, Dean, Macca, and Ed (right to left) stood ready to repel the enemy. The midfield quartet of Luke, Andy, Tony, and Kaine promised creativity and graft, while the dynamic duo of Joe and Carlos spearheaded the attack. Carlos, it must be noted, was still basking in the glow of what fans dubbed “the greatest headed goal in club history” from a previous game.

*The First Half: Luke’s Brilliance*

The opening exchanges were scrappy, as both sides grappled for control. But Blackwater, powered by grit and determination that can only be forged in the fires of mid-table Sunday league football, broke through after 15 minutes. A divine pass—a contender for the Assist of the Millennium—landed at the feet of Blackwater talisman Luke, who slotted it home with aplomb. Fans erupted into cheers audible all the way to Farnham.

Buoyed by his opening strike, Luke doubled his tally minutes later with a shot so precise it could’ve been measured with a spirit level. From an improbable angle, he chose accuracy over power, leaving the opposition keeper a bystander in his own six-yard box. 2-0 and the Blackwater faithful dared to dream.

While Blackwater controlled much of the half, a reluctance to push for more saw the game enter halftime on a comfortable yet cautious note. Cue the Churchillian halftime speech by manager Glenn McCormick, which lit a fire under his men. Among the most inspired? Right-back John, whose ears pricked up as the gaffer spoke like a prophet in shin pads.

*The Second Half: A Masterclass in Domination*

Within minutes of the restart, John delivered. From an improbable range on the right flank, he unleashed a shot so venomous it may require anti-dote sponsorship. The net bulged. 3-0, and assistant manager Darren could be seen mouthing, “That’s the game wrapped up.”

But Darren underestimated the Vets’ appetite for destruction. With five substitutes warming up—Club Owner Wardy, Lairy Dave, Non-Lairy Dave, Movember Tom, and the clubs joint second highest league goalscorer Stephen Strang—Blackwater injected new energy that left the opposition in tatters.

The goals came thick and fast:
1. Craig Ward lit up the pitch with a strike so outrageous that opposing players muttered, “Did he mean that?” History suggests he did.
2. Kaine, South Africa’s second fastest sprinter, stormed into the box, only to be scythed down by terrified Farnham defenders. The referee pointed to the spot. In form striker/left back/ centre midfielder Ed attempted to take the ball but Captain Joe, instead stepped up and coolly converted. 5-0.

Not to be outdone, Luke completed his hat trick with a thunderbolt that could’ve registered on the Richter scale. Sensing glory, he eyed Joe’s club-record five-goal haul, but time wasn’t on his side.

Finally, Craig returned to the spotlight, delivering Blackwater’s seventh with what might’ve been a cross—or a shot. Debate raged on the touchline, but the scoreline didn’t care. 7-0, and Blackwater Vets cemented their status as cup specialists.

*Defensive Steel and Standout Performances*

While the goals stole headlines, Blackwater’s backline was impenetrable. Macca, a summer signing whose confident walk alone intimidated strikers, proved invaluable alongside the vocal leadership of Deano. Together, they ensured Jonty had little to do, but when called upon, the club’s best-ever keeper delivered another assured performance, sealing the team’s second clean sheet of the season.

*A Club on the Rise*

As the final whistle blew, the Blackwater players embraced like heroes, their march into the third round of the Invitational Cup confirmed. A reputation as a “cup team” is brewing, and opponents would do well to take notice.

Blackwater Vets are not just a team; they are a force of nature. They may play on boggy fields and fight through dodgy hamstrings, but their spirit is anything but Sunday league. In their hearts and in the eyes of their loyal supporters, they are the embodiment of football’s true essence: grit, passion, and a willingness to leave everything on the pitch. This is more than just a team—it’s a band of brothers chasing glory one game at a time.

Dave Parsells Charity Cup_2024 - 2025 (Quarter-Final)
Sun 03 Nov 2024 Blackwater Veterans-v-Wrecclesham Vets Casuals
Full time 4-4 after penalties 4-2 unlucky loss the boys played well 👏🏼👏🏼
Springs Pre-School C & M Roofing and Building Ltd National-Fencing

⚽️⚽️What a win!!!!⚽️⚽️
8-0!!! Man of the match goes to our very own Steve Strang 🏆great game today mate fully deserved!!!!
Quick mention to our amazing sponsors…
C & M Roofing and Building Ltd National-Fencing
https://www.facebook.com/springpreschool

Great match today Blackwater F.C Vets VS Stanwell Old Boys FC 1-1

Match 1…8/9/24 results vs Sandhurst 1-1

Match 2…today…v.s Stanwell old boys.

Tomorrow’s game looks like it’s going to be postponed again 👎🏼👎🏼👎🏼 pitch inspection to be done this lunchtime bring on the sunshine ☀️ so we can play some football ⚽️