Free and Easy AF Coaching

For a long time I wore the patch of people pleaser. I told the story that I “hated letting people down” and “wanted to make people happy” but the reality is it was about me.

I wanted to make people happy SO I DIDN’T FEEL GUILTY.

I don’t want to say no SO I DON’T FEEL AWFUL AFTERWARDS.

I want to be there because if I’m not I’LL HAVE PEOPLE TALKING NEGATIVELY ABOUT ME.

At the end of the day people pleasing is about ourselves.

And not wanting to feel uncomfortable emotions.

In working with people there’s always a “ah ha” moment when someone understands that they’re not really pleasing— they’re controlling. They’re trying to control how someone perceives them. And how they feel.

Once you understand this, you can start breaking the pattern.

The truth is: adults are capable of being disappointed. And you aren’t here to please everyone around you. You’re here to be authentically yourself. That’s how you have resentment- free relationships

Maybe it’s time we start learning how to actually feel our emotions, how to actually be there for someone, and how to grieve. Our anxiety is because we just haven’t learned how

A reminder we all need, especially when our nervous system goes into overdrive, and our unconscious brain is screaming "Disaster!" at us.

In this present moment, you are safe. Emotions are safe to feel. The more you focus on your body, and allowing yourself to feel, the quieter your mind will become.

Trust. This will pass.

Do you always check the ingredients list on food packets?

Perhaps you worry about the additives or whether something has too much sugar or too much salt, or it’s too ultra processed…

I’ve worked with a lot of really smart, well educated, savvy women, who care about the quality of their food, but are turning a blind eye to what’s in their wine and all the associated health risks.

And because alcohol producers don’t have to list the ingredients, it's really easy to pretend it’s just mashed up grapes... 🫠🍷

I’m not mentioning this because I think that knowing what’s in your wine - or understanding the cancer risk - will magically change your relationship with it.

However, it is important information. It's all part of you deciding what has a place in your world and what doesn’t.

And on this topic... how do you feel about the fact that manufacturers don’t even have to mention what’s in the wine on the label?

Personally, I’m amazed the wine industry is not held to the same labeling standards as other food and beverage industries.

I AM cocooning!

Your unconscious brain talks at you non stop. It wants to keep you safe, which stifles growth and generates self doubt. But it's NOT REAL. It doesn't even know who you are. But YOU know who you are. Pick the voice that believes in you. Visualise your life as you want it to be. Keep doing it. Your brain will start to ease off with the negative s**t. Focus. Look back at your past achievements. The only thing holding you back is fear. You can do this. Talk to yourself. Out loud. "I am capable, committed, and I can do whatever I set my mind on." You've got this.