Karin Peeters - Vitalis Coaching & Therapy

Live on BBC Radio London... 🎙️ Was I nervous? You bet I was!

Is September inspiring you to get your ducks in a row? Then listen to my BBC Radio London interview on September Reset. I was interviewed on Tuesday (Sept 1st) and tried hard not to think of all the people on the road or in open plan offices listening in, while not to stumble over my words . Luckily, it went super well.

For many of us, getting back to the routines is a natural moment of reflection and reassess our priorities. You can listen to the replay on the BBC website for a couple of days (you need to create a free account). My interview begins at 19.30 minutes into the show: https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m0030ljy

Or you can listen via this audio file, which automatically downloads. As BBC doesn't allow commercial use of the recording of the show after their link expires, I created this audio file as my gift to you: https://www.vitaliscoaching.com/s/BBC-Radio-London-September-Reset-Karin-Peeters.m4a

Enjoy listening to the inspiring interview (with a big thank you to Nikki Bedi and the team at BBC Radio, and learn about all-or-nothing mindsets, practical actions to make your September Reset happen, and advice how not to fall back into old habits.

My best wishes for September, may it be full of kind, intentional decisions, true to yourself.

Warmest,
Karin

Just spoke live on BBC Radio Berkshire/Oxford about how to change careers in later life.

EasyJet are looking to hire cabin crew who are specifically over 50: https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/easyjet-over-50-recruitment-midlife-career-change-work-b3039011.html, and it’s a genius move.

- My advice is to look backwards before looking forwards.
Examine previous work and life experiences to identify where you felt energised or drained, appreciated or taken for granted, growing or stagnant. Ask yourself “When do I feel most like myself at work?”.

- Don’t start with transferable skills, instead look at your qualities as a person. Focus on your qualities as a person, in what role, industry, work environment and culture are you most yourself? It’s about transferrable value, not just skills.

- Maturity comes with a deep desire to make intentional, aligned choices. My clients realise how precious their time is, and want to pursue a career that is truly meaningful to them.

- Organisations have a responsibility around ageism.
It's the individual's responsibility to remain employable but I believe organisations need to create opportunities for all levels of experience as well.

Life is precious. Don’t waste it doing a job you hate. A fulfilling career is possible for you too.

Karin Peeters
Life Coach, Career Coach and Psychotherapist
www.vitaliscoaching.com

Caring note: this post comes with a grief warning 🤍🕯️.

I think life often tries to fool us
That it is permanent somehow.
Relationships, a job, income, stuff:
We act as if it's all here to stay.
Our own life, most of all.
Many of us believe we 'deserve' to live
Until at least 80+ years old.

On the 30th of August
It's National Grief Awareness Day.

Here's an invitation:
Let us all look around,
Watch the faces
Of those near and dear,
And realise
That life is so precious...
Everyone knows someone
Who had to leave this earth.
We all had to say goodbye
To people, pets, jobs, countries,
Homes, health, youth,
Relationships, dreams...

💔 Loss and grief
Comes in so many
Shapes and sizes.

And yet,
We continue to live
As if we have time.
As if what is precious
Is here to stay.

We want to believe
We have the
Time to do
What is on the wish-list.
To have time to say
What needs to be said,
And to have space
For what matters most.

But anyone
With a health condition,
Or those
Who lost a dear one,
And those who know
Grief and loss,
They realise:
Another day
Isn't guaranteed,
Another moment
Isn't promised.

May you live long,
But act as
If today is your last.

I believe that
Understanding impermanence
Isn't something sad.

It's realising
That everything changes:
The good and the bad.
When we stop grasping
To permanence,
And realise
Impermanence fully,
Oh the appreciation,
The love, the gratitude
We come to feel...

Life is so precious,
Live it true to yourself.

Sending you my love, today, on National Grief Awareness Day and always.

Warmest,
Karin

LIVE AN ALIGNED, INTENTIONAL LIFE
Read more on how to navigate major change: https://www.vitaliscoaching.com/blog/life-transition-coaching

Photos: Unsplash, with gratitude.

PS.
Life is full of moments that can leave us feeling a sense of loss, whether it’s a career change, a relationship ending, a move, a health scare, or simply reaching a stage of life that feels unfamiliar. Please schedule a free Discovery Call (https://www.vitaliscoaching.com/free-discovery-call). It would be an honour to hear from you.

Trouble sleeping? The lovely Grace McIntosh just interviewed me for her Podcast on all things sleep. Curious about the difference between being tired and being sleepy, want to know my favourite sleep hacks as a Coach & Therapist, and learn how to help your nervous system wind down and have proper restorative sleep, keep an eye on this place as I'll share the link as soon as it's been published.

In the meantime, you can enjoy her other episodes here:
https://open.spotify.com/show/30l06lyb9chPfxHr2CZjVt

And here is the link to the article: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/ng-interactive/2026/aug/14/life-lessons-from-happiest-man-in-the-world-tiny-changes-meditation

See previous post what this happiest man in the world taught me (in Nepal, back in 2019 when I was on a two day retreat with him), and how it can help you today.

Karin xx

Discover what the happiest man in the world taught me. And how it can help you.

It gave me great joy to see one of my meditation teachers in The Guardian this weekend. The article is called Nine life lessons from the happiest man in the world.

I had the immense good fortune to meet this happiest man several times in Nepal during my spiritual sabbatical, and to receive profound teachings on meditation, compassion, and well, happiness 😍.His name is Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche, and he is the younger brother of my main spiritual teacher, Chokyi Nyima Rinpoche.

"Stressed out, endlessly scrolling and never satisfied? Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche, the Buddhist monk with off-the-charts levels of contentment, may have the answers…"

You can read The Guardian article here: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/ng-interactive/2026/aug/14/life-lessons-from-happiest-man-in-the-world-tiny-changes-meditation

BRINGING THE WISDOM OF THE HAPPIEST MAN TO YOU
Those of you who have worked with me will recognise Mingyur Rinpoche's words from our sessions: “We try to get away from difficult emotions, but those feelings are wisdom, in a way. The really important thing is to sit with them, embrace them as a path to explore.”

I do this by inviting my clients to take exactly the opposite approach as we habitually follow in normal life. When we feel something unpleasant, we want it to stop and we try to accomplish this by turning away from the emotions. Scrolling, food, alcohol, work, gaming. We become masters at avoidance, at numbing. Yet it doesn't work. The emotions find a way to get through, usually when they are least wanted, resulting in sleepless nights, anxiety, angry outbursts or tears when we want to be strong.

During our Coaching & Therapy sessions I teach you how to stay with the emotions. Just like Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche taught me. There is nothing religious about it. I've heard people jokingly say that the Buddha was the first Cognitive Behaviour Therapist ever. His teachings show us how to tame our mind. And from my experience, true happiness is right there.

Your thoughts and emotions are messengers. Yes, also the most challenging ones. They have fascinating layers of information to share. And when we listen with curiosity and compassion, they will transform. It is inevitable. I feel so confident about this, I dare to say I promise you that those difficult feelings will melt like frost in sunshine. And that, brings peace.

Wishing you happiness,
Karin xx

PS
Curious to learn these ancient techniques so your thoughts and emotions don't control you, but you're in charge of your own mind and heart? Trust me, from my own experience, it brings great peace. And yes, happiness 😊. Please schedule a free Discovery Call (https://www.vitaliscoaching.com/free-discovery-call). I'd be delighted to hear from you.

Just received a wonderful endorsement from my Psychotherapist colleague Hilda Burke, verified via the platform Psychology Today. Thank you ❤️ . It was a pleasure training with you, back in 2008. Can you believe it, 18 years ago (I'm most definitely in denial about that last bit).

Here is a link to my profile on Psychology Today, with three verified endorsements by fellow therapist colleagues who super-kindly recommend my work (and I theirs!): https://www.psychologytoday.com/profile/1757989

Lovely weekend everyone!

Karin xx

Find a kinder way to communicate and try a new approach today.

We all long to be seen, heard and understood, but so often this is missing in our experience. This results in conflict and feeling lonely, criticised and hurt.

I'm passionate about the importance of emotionally safe communication. So today I’m sharing an example of the model for Non-Violent Communication trusting that it provides a helpful framework when you face challenging conversations.

Let’s bring the model of Non-Violent Communication to life with an example of a difficult conversation:

You’re talking with your partner about something you both feel passionately about, your child's university choices for example, the family finances, the holiday destination or the works that need doing in the house…

As you get into the meat of debate, the temperature starts to rise, voices get raised, and each of you is battling to get their point across. Every time you begin to express your view, your partner cuts across you and you don’t get to finish a sentence. They’ve only got half the story so they keep jumping to conclusions… the wrong ones. Frustration builds.

When you do finally get to make a point your partner sneers with a "well that's just unrealistic" comment. As the debate continues, your defences go up and you start to attack.

It's no longer about the university, holiday or refurbishment, it’s become more personal, you blurt out with "why don’t you ever listen to me?”, your partner retorts with their own shot across the bow about how you’re being "too emotional" and one of you gives the killer blow “there’s just no point in having these conversations with you, I don’t know why I bother”...

Your emotional wall goes up and you withdraw to try and recover, and your partner left in a huff and is short-fused with everything and everyone for days...

Let's try a new approach, with the help of Non-Violent Communication. The model has four steps: I notice, I feel, I need and I request.

"I can hear how much this matters to both of us and I notice we are beginning to interrupt each other.

When that happens I don’t feel heard and worry that I’m going to be misunderstood. When you say ‘there’s no point in talking to me’ I feel really upset and like my place in this family doesn’t matter to you.

I really want this to be a positive conversation, and need to feel heard by you so I know that my opinion is being considered as we make this decision together.

I've got a request. Would you be willing to repeat back what my views are, so I can trust and relax, knowing you have heard me?”

LEARN THE FOUR STEPS:
https://www.vitaliscoaching.com/blog/non-violent-communication

Warmest, Karin

Non-Violent Communication - speak up without feeling anxious Non-Violent Communication brings an end to walking away from conversations feeling frustrated, unheard and misunderstood. No more sleepless nights practising a conversation in your head, only to go numb when confronted with this person. Learn NVC today.

Four easy steps to communicate better: How often have you walked away from a conversation feeling frustrated or anxious, where things got unintentionally unkind and you wish you had responded differently? Want to bring an end to sleepless nights overthinking what was said? Want to stop exchanges turning into arguments, especially during the summer months, when we are all spending more time together than usual?

A compassionate approach to life, of which you know I am an enthusiastic proponent, lies at the heart of the process of Non-Violent Communication.

Let’s learn the four steps of Non-Violent Communication today, and have those difficult conversations with more confidence and ease (instead of ending up having an argument).

The model has four steps: I notice, I feel, I need and I request:
https://www.vitaliscoaching.com/blog/non-violent-communication

Step One: I notice
This is where objectively notice what is going on, without seeking to label it or make value judgements.

When something happens that affects our sense of well-being our task here is to just observe the behaviour in an as factual way as possible. So rather than saying ‘You’re so selfish’ it might be ‘You didn’t say hello or kissed me when I arrived home’.

Step Two: I feel
This step is about naming the emotions and physical sensations we are experiencing in the moment, based on what we observed in step one.

Step Three: I need
The ability to discern which of our needs hasn't been met is vital here. Our needs and wants are not something needy or selfish. They represent what matters to us, our values and desires that bring happiness and fulfilment. When they aren't met, this naturally gives rise to challenging emotions.

Step Four: I request
This is where we state what we actually want the other person to do/say in order to get our needs met. The clue of how we phrase that is in the title, it’s a request, not a demand.

With love, Karin