Colin Houlihan Therapy

The first and most important relationship we have is with ourselves. Understanding how we relate to ourselves enhances how we can make positive change in our lives. Possibly the hardest step in my own journey, was accepting that I was the biggest barrier in my way.

Do you know how it feels to be judged, shamed, rejected by someone else? How often do you think this way about yourself? Internally, there's no one there to witness this act and it's hard to defend ourselves. Accepting who we are, as vague and corny as it may sound, allows us to focus on moving forwards instead of cycles of guilt, shame, self-punishment & disappointment.

How do you relate to yourself? What do you see, think, or say when you see yourself in the mirror?

Understanding from which Ego State we are reacting to the world around us can help explain our thoughts, feelings, and behaviour. It also help us to adjust our frame of minds to particular situations or interacting with other people.

Going deeper, it can also help as a framework to understand the core beliefs we hold about ourselves and others, such as 'I am unlovable', 'other people are irresponsible', or 'if I pretend I'm okay, you'll think I'm okay'.

Which ego state did you wake up in? Which do you recognise most in yourself?

Whilst attitudes to mental health are changing, I think the classic Freudian image of therapist and couch are conjured when people think of talking therapies. However, with the pandemic and even beforehand, telephone and online counselling services have grown in popularity. You can now access help outside in a park, on walks, and even over weekend hiking trips!

Where have you had sessions? What worked or maybe didn't work so well? Where would you like to have a session?

Whilst attitudes to mental health are changing, I think the classic Freudian image of therapist and couch are conjured when people think of talking therapies. However, with the pandemic and even beforehand, telephone and online counselling services have grown in popularity. You can now access help outside in a park, on walks, and even over weekend hiking trips!

Where have you had sessions? What worked or maybe didn't work so well? Where would you like to have a session?

Clients sometimes feel frustrated, unable to replicate the freedom and insight they experience in session when they are living their everyday lives. Whilst a second perspective is useful, and having a secure and boundaried place to do investigate ourselves aids this process, it is also a skill that can be learned.

I've used the term 'Lateral Exploration' to describe how there is always another option, decision, viewpoint or behaviour available to us in every situation. Even if we feel trapped, this tells us something, and guides the next stage of enquiry. Such questions could be:
What is the opposite?
When was this not here? How else could this be? Where is this found in other parts of your life?

The stories we are told, tell others and tell ourselves can shape the life we live. What is your story? What narratives are you telling?

The Serpent, Genuineness & Therapy The stories we are told as children inform the way we understand the world. Indeed, they are the bedrock of how we meet and learn to inhabit the world. For instance; gravity can be deadly, but community is a great healer. Especially if you're an oddly-named egg. Or, don't tell lies or no one will be...

Some of the general benefits associated with seeking psychological help...What other positives have you experienced? What aspects of your life changed once you started exploring your life?