Kari Ann Roberts

You are more than your responsibilities
(Read that again)

Being a parent in today’s world can feel overwhelming, the truth is, small, intentional changes can make a big difference.

Teach problem solving, not perfection.

Mistakes are part of learning. Supporting your child to think through solutions helps them develop resilience and confidence skills they’ll carry for life.

Questions that promote problem solving:
What do you think we could try next?
If that didn’t work, what else might?
What would you do if you were the grown-up here?
Can you think of three different ways we could fix this?
How do you think your friend might feel in this situation?
If this happens again, what could you do differently?
What’s the first small step we can take to sort this out?
Is there another way to look at this problem?
What do you already know that might help here?
Want to come up with a plan together?

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Something I hear time and time again is this myth: A parent needs to sacrifice themselves to be a good parent!

Being a good parent doesn’t mean losing yourself, it means caring for yourself with the same tenderness you offer your child.

Why:
When you care for yourself, your child learns it’s safe to care for themselves too.
Research shows that self compassion and self care aren’t just helpful, they’re essential.
Children watch how we treat ourselves.
When we model calm, kindness, and boundaries, we’re not just surviving, we’re teaching emotional safety, resilience, and self-worth.
Studies in parenting and wellbeing show:
Parents who look after their emotional health raise children who are better at self regulation.
When we’re kind to ourselves, our children learn how to be kind to themselves.
Taking care of you, helps them feel secure, seen, and loved.

Instead of asking, “Am I doing enough?”
Try asking: What’s one small way I can show myself compassion today?
Would I speak to my child the way I’m speaking to myself right now?”
What would it look like to parent from a place of fullness, not depletion or resentment?
You matter.
Your wellbeing isn’t extra it’s essential.
Self care isn’t selfish.
It’s foundational parenting.

Mums have you been mis sold the myth that you can have it all at the same time?

Mid week Tips

I am often asked how to balance your own needs and your children’s
Here are a four things that help and by doing this for ourselves we show our children which is so powerful!

1. Emotional Independence
Being able to deal with tough decisions, knowing that you are okay independently without needing someone else to sort it out. Knowing what activates and why, helps so much!

2. You’re not your thoughts
This can be tough as we have been brainwashed over years to believe that we are what we think. Our thoughts are not the full story they are stories and moments!

3. Focus on what you can do rather than what you can’t
Focus on the things we know we can change. It fruitless spending all in time on things we have no control over.

4. Remember your children are their own person not you!
Children are not owned by their parents. They are not here to make you feel loved, to make you look good or meet your needs!

Today is National Children's Day
Every child deserves to have love, safety and connection.
How do we do that as parents if we don't feel, loved, safe and connected?

Your child deserves a parent who does the work to notice what is behind their behaviour, their activators and their fears.
Commit to taking one step towards this. If you don't know I can help you. Message me.

What someone can’t tell you they will make you feel
Non verbal communication happens every hour of every day

You don’t have room for me now that the babies are here.
His words stopped me in my tracks and hit me like a punch in the stomach.

I genuinely thought I’d done enough to help him feel included still deeply loved, still a big part of our family.
But in that moment, I realised I’d missed something important.
He’d been quieter at home, a little more withdrawn at school.
I’d even convinced myself it must be something happening in his classroom. I was getting ready to speak with his teacher.

And then, on a quiet walk home, he said those words.

That’s when it clicked.
I needed to stop guessing what he needed, and start listening.
Really listening.

We sat and talked about his feelings, about what had changed, about what he thought might help. That conversation shifted everything.

If you're navigating a big change in your family especially the arrival of a new baby, it’s completely normal for older children to experience a swirl of emotions.
They may act out, go quiet, or say things that break your heart a little.
This isn’t about blame. It’s about understanding.

Instead of correcting or dismissing those feelings, try sitting with them.
Acknowledge.
Listen.
Offer a few extra cuddles.
Don’t say not know, say when I have fed/changed the baby then we will.

Even ten minutes of one on one time a day reading a bedtime story, going for a short walk, or just chatting while you make a cup of tea can make a huge difference.
It reminds the you still see me, you still hear me, I still matter.

And if they’re not ready to warm up to the new sibling yet? That’s okay too. Let it unfold gently.

Have you been through something similar?
I’d love to hear your experience it helps so much to know we’re not alone in this.

Are you on autopilot
Putting one foot in front of the other

Or are Worrying about breathing properly while trying to breath

Feeling stressed about not feeling stressed

Exhausted from trying to relax?

This is the reality when we put pressure on ourselves and take all the hints and advice in one go.

To do lists that get longer and longer each day

No time for fun, no time for laughter!

The reality of being a mum, working or not working, running a household and everything else.

Anyone feeling this?

What brings you to the point where you think I need to do something differently in my parenting?