06/10/2026
8 QUESTIONS EVERY PARENT SHOULD ASK THEIR CHILD AFTER SCHOOL
Sometimes we ask our children,
*“How was school?”*
And they say:
*“Fine.”*
“What did you do?”
“Nothing.”
“How was your day?”
“Okay.”
And we move on.
But sometimes, *beneath that “fine” is a child who was bullied, embarrassed, left out, confused, celebrated, excited, worried—or simply longing for your attention.*
So instead of asking questions that can be answered with one word, try opening the door a little wider.
*1. “What was the best thing that happened at school today?”*
This helps you discover what brings your child joy—the people, activities, achievements and moments that light them up.
*2. “Was there anything that made you sad, worried or uncomfortable today?”*
Children don't always volunteer difficult experiences.
This question tells them, “You can bring the hard things to me too.”
*3. “What did you learn today?”*
Not just because you want to know their grades.
Because you want to know what is occupying their mind, what they are discovering and where they may need support.
*4. “Was anything difficult for you today?”*
Sometimes “difficult” isn't about schoolwork.
It could be a friendship, a teacher, a social situation, an emotion or something they don't yet have words for.
*5. “Who did you spend time with today?”*
Knowing your child's world includes knowing the people shaping it.
Friendships influence our children more than we sometimes realise.
*6. “Did anything happen today that you didn't understand?”*
Children encounter conversations, behaviours and situations they may not know how to interpret.
You want to be the person they can come to when they are confused.
*7. “Was there anything you wanted to tell me but didn't know how to say?”*
This one can be powerful.
Because sometimes the child isn't silent because they don't want to talk.
They are silent because they don't know how you'll respond.
*8. “Is there anything you need my help with?”*
Remind your child:
I am not only here to correct you.
I am here to help you.
And sometimes, don't ask a question at all.
Simply say:
“Tell me about your day.”
Then listen.
Really listen.
*Don't immediately turn everything into a lesson.*
Don't rush to solve every problem.
Don't dismiss what seems small to you.
*And don't interrogate them with all eight questions every evening.*
Choose *one or two.* Ask naturally. Follow their lead.
Because the *goal isn't to complete a questionnaire.*
The goal is *connection.*
*Your child needs to know that home is a place where they can bring their joy, their mistakes, their confusion, their fears, their questions and their stories.*
The conversations you create today may determine what your child feels safe enough to tell you tomorrow.
Build a home where your children don't just know that you love them—
they know they can talk to you.
— Coach Paps Wanyugi
*Your Family Wellness & Confidence Coach*
www.reconfidencewithpaps.co.ke
