Nicky Vonk Coaching

Een relatie waarin je je gezien, gewaardeerd en onvoorwaardelijk geliefd voelt om wie je diep van binnen bent.⁣
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De connectie die jouw veilige thuishaven vormt, vanwaar 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘶𝘱 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘤 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥. 🔥⁣
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Om je oude pijn te helen en ervan los te breken.⁣
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Een plek van wederzijdse support, om de uitdagingen van het leven aan te gaan. Samen. ⁣
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Om te leren. Te groeien. Jezelf te ontwikkelen.⁣
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Om van nu af aan volledig vrij te zijn. ⁣
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Vrij om echt helemaal jezelf te zijn. ⁣
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Zonder belemmeringen. Zonder angst. Zonder onzekerheid. ⁣
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Een samenzijn waarin je je niet meer hoeft aan te passen, je geen 'rol' hoeft te spelen. Nergens aan hoeft te voldoen om liefde te 'verdienen'. ⁣
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Waarin je elke dag meer en meer wordt van wie je werkelijk bent.⁣
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Het is een plek waar al je emoties er mogen zijn. Ook de lastige. Waarin ze worden omarmd en beide partners zich volledig veilig voelen om eerlijk en open uit te spreken wat hen op het hart ligt, ook - en júist - als dat moeilijke of ongemakkelijke gevoelens met zich meebrengt.⁣
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Het is een relatie waarin angst en onzekerheid actief worden alchemized tot een diep vertrouwen in jezelf en in de ander.⁣
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Zodat je VRIJ bent.⁣
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Vrij om je authentieke zelf te zijn.⁣
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En je daarin gesteund en aangemoedigd voelt. ⁣
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Onvoorwaardelijk geliefd voelt. ⁣
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𝗧𝗼 𝘁𝗿𝘂𝗹𝘆 𝗧𝗛𝗥𝗜𝗩𝗘 𝗶𝗻 𝗹𝗶𝗳𝗲, ⁣
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𝘁𝗼𝗴𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿, ⁣
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𝗮𝘀 𝗮 𝘁𝗲𝗮𝗺. 💕⁣
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The '𝘔𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘤 𝘴𝘬𝘪𝘭𝘭' that will change your relationships: HOLDING SPACE. ✨
But most people can't do this. Why?

Because we're wired to take. To want. To seek from others. We don't want to accept someone's opinions and worldviews if they don't match ours. Especially if we care about them. So we try to convince, control, and manipulate. Maybe not in an obvious way. It can be very subtle. Most likely, we're not even aware we're doing it. But we are, we judge.

𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘪𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯 𝘵𝘰 "𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘴𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘦"?
It means to meet someone where they're at without judgment. To donate your ears and heart without wanting anything back. To practice empathy and compassion. It's our attempt at giving a person the physical and mental space that they need in the present moment, to accept someone's truth, without pushing them into anything. To allow and accept. Embrace with two hands instead of pointing with one finger. To come in neutral. Open. For them - not you. Holding space is kindness and empathy in action.

It is in this space that we feel seen and understood. We know that we have the power to heal ourselves and that whoever is in this space with us will be there to see it through.

My definition of holding space is: the process of witnessing and validation someone else's emotional state while simultaneously being present to your own.

𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗱𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗼𝗹𝗱 𝘀𝗽𝗮𝗰𝗲?
👉 Swipe left for some tips & save this post! ✨
I think holding space is the biggest gift we can give others. And it's free! 🤗

𝘕𝘰𝘸 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘤𝘢𝘯 YOU 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘴𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴?
I would love to hear from you down in the comments and am holding space for your thoughts and questions about this! 😊

Credit: the wonderfully inspiring .the.good.life 💕🙏

4 years ago I took the biggest leap of my life.

I was 22 years old and was in the process of recovering from a burn-out that had crumbled my whole life apart; I had to quit my job, ended my relationship and was forced to move back in with my parents--everything I had worked SO hard for and had built up for myself, was gone.

I felt like a failure. Like I should have done better and was a loser for not being able to do it. All my life I had been convinced that in order to be succesful, you had to work your hardest to get the things you wanted and that if it didn't work, you'd just have to step up your game and give even more. I had always measured my self worth based on the external success I had. So being offered a job before I even graduated had me over the moon. I had finally reached the success I had been working so hard for. But I always had to give more. do more. be better. And I couldn't anymore.

The moment I everything came crashing down, my self worth disappeared too. I was left feeling empty, worthless and lost. In my continuous fight for that approval of 'being succesful', I had completely neglected myself and was left physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted.

It felt like starting my life from rock-bottom. I had no idea what I was going to do next, what I wanted or who I even was. But I knew I had to do SOMETHING. So I made a bold move and decided to go to France to learn French.

I ended up in a beautiful village on the Côte d'Azur in a pretty beat up building with 20 other international students. We didn't have much there, but we had all the freedom and time in the world. It brought us back to the basics, to living and enjoying the moment and appreciating the small things in life. Laughing until you cry about silly misunderstandings caused by language barriers, learning about the different cultures by improvised dinner nights cooking with whatever was there and tasting eachother's traditional cuisine, staying up all night sharing a mattress on the floor having meaningful conversations for hours while looking at the stars, but most of all truly connecting to the people around us, all trying to figure out the same thing; who we were, what we wanted and what we were going to do with our lives.

It was here where I found my place again, started redefining who I am without needing external validation or success, discovered hidden qualities and interests and made some of the most valuable connections with people that will be in my heart for the rest of my life.

Looking back we were just a bunch of young kids that had no clue about what to make of their life, but had everything we needed to enjoy the way it is meant to be lived. What a wonderful time, which has humbled me and showed me what truly matters in my life. I will be forever grateful.

Morgen geef ik in Amsterdam de cursus Kickstart je Droomcarrière. Een cursus die ik speciaal heb ontwikkeld voor twintigers die aan het begin van hun carrière staan en geen idee hebben wat ze willen. In deze cursus bouw je een stevige basis om goed voorbereid de arbeidsmarkt te betreden. Je gaat op zoek naar jouw unieke skills, kennis, passies en persoonlijkheid die jou van onschatbare waarde maken voor een werkgever. Daarnaast zet je voor jezelf duidelijk op een rij wat jij nodig hebt in je werk om er voldoening uit de halen en er een succes van te maken. Je gaat naar huis met duidelijkheid: een helder carrièredoel, blauwdruk voor jouw werkgeluk en toffe pitch om jouw toekomstige werkgever mee in te pakken. 💪

Ik heb er zin an!! 🎉

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