The Mental Edge - NZ

One more day of the Solo Pro Summit to come.

This weekend, I was supporting my husband in his first half marathon 🙌
In a crowd of 5,000, I spotted someone I thought was Seamus Marten (co-host of the Between two Beers podcast) I’d just posted about last week).

And then I hesitated.
“What if it’s not him?”
“What if he doesn’t know me?”
“Don’t be weird.”

I almost left it.
But then I remembered how many times I’ve done that and regretted it.
So after 10 mins of internal debate (and photo comparison 😅), I walked over.

“Seamus?”
A flicker of surprise, but then, warmth.
I told him I knew Di Foster, loved the podcast, and just wanted to say hi.

We chatted (ok, I did most of the chatting 😅), and he was… exactly as you hope someone will be.

Still. Present. Open.
His energy puts you at ease — like you’ve known him for years.

Of course I asked for a selfie 📸
And then he asked me to send it to him so he could share it with Dr Jo (cue me trying to act casual while my hands shook slightly typing the info in).

Honestly?
Highlight of my weekend.

But more than that — I’m proud of myself.
For pushing past the nerves.
For saying hi.
For showing up.

✨ The universe has a funny way of putting exactly the right person in front of you — not to test your confidence, but to help you grow it. ✨

Change doesn’t always feel like a holiday… but it can still be the reset you didn’t know you needed.

This move into my new office stirred more than just my furniture, it stirred reflection, growth, and the quiet kind of courage that comes with transition.

Midlife isn’t about starting over.
It’s about moving forward, with clarity, experience, and confidence that’s been earned.

You don’t have to wait for the perfect moment.
You are the moment.

Doubt?

I feel it most in my chest.

Heavy. Tight. Like a vice squeezing the air from me.

And yes — even though I coach mindset and confidence — that doesn’t mean I don't battle it too.
Some weeks, multiple times.

I used to think doubt was a problem.
Now I see it for what it really is: a signal.

A signal to pause.
To get curious.
To strengthen my inner voice — the one that speaks with kindness and clarity, not chaos.

Growth requires doubt.

Without it, I stagnate.

I'm not here because I've mastered doubt.
I'm here because I know how to walk through it — choosing courage, even when it's uncomfortable.

And so can you. 🤍

Someone told me I’ve got balls of steel.

Really?
let’s be real… balls? Not exactly the symbol of strength. One hit and it’s game over.

Me? I’ve got ovaries of steel.
Maybe even a uterus forged in fire.

Because what I’m carrying doesn’t flinch.
It endures. Creates. Leads. Heals. Rebuilds.

Women are not “tough for a woman.”
We’re just… tough. Period.

We grow humans.
We set boundaries.
We handle work, emotions, politics—and yes, the group chat.
We lead with instinct, not ego.
We get gritty, not fragile.

So no, I’m not posting that Barbie-in-a-box trend.
Instead, here’s this AI-generated image as a reminder:
We’re built different.

Tag a badass woman who needs to hear this today.

“Wear the damn shorts”

What a great campaign from Sweaty Betty. Loved playing a small part in it with my input for their blog.

Happy reading

A Conversation on Confidence with Paula Rule At Sweaty Betty, we believe in embracing every version of ourselves—strong, bold, and unapologetically confident. But when the time comes, how often do we find ourselves hesitating to wear the shorts, questioning how we look rather than celebrating how we feel? Enter Paula Rule, confidence coach a...

✨ The magic happens outside our comfort zone. ✨

Last week, I resigned. Not because I had to, but because I knew I’d stopped being uncomfortable. Growth is one of my core values—and it was time to fully honor it.

Was I nervous? Absolutely. Almost a decade of delivering mental skills to high-performing student athletes was a huge part of my life. But that little whisper? It became a shout. It was time to listen.

What led me here? 👇
💡 You can’t go all in when you’re only showing up part-time.
🔥 Stagnation or growth? I chose growth.
❤️ Family first—my husband, my kids, my purpose.
✨ And, of course, alignment.

Today, I feel calm, clear, and (still a little nervous, but that’s normal 😉).

So, hi—I’m Paula. A solopreneur, Confidence Coach, and all-in business owner. If you or your team need a confidence reset—real confidence, no bravado—let’s talk. DM me

✨ Feeling Grateful ✨

I’m so lucky to work with amazing people and help them transform their mindset and confidence. It’s a privilege I never take for granted. 💛

While I get to work with people from all walks of life—sport, business, and beyond—there’s something extra special about working with athletes. My background in sport and PE teaching makes it feel like home. 🏀

One standout this season is Esra, who came to me wanting help with “confidence and consistency.” Together, we created simple pre-, during-, and post-game routines to help her stay focused and confident every step of the way.

Her words say it all:
"These tools that I’ve been taught and adopted have significantly improved how I feel." 🙌

Esra’s had an incredible season with the Mainland Pouākai and earlier this year with the Tall Blacks. Watching her shine is exactly why I do what I do—but what’s made it even more special is seeing my kids fall in love with the game by cheering for her and the Pouākai team at home games. 💕

This is why I love what I do.

📸: Mainland Pouākai

Fear thrives in four key situations:
🔹 Change
🔹 Uncertainty
🔹 Struggle
🔹 Attention

And let’s face it—fear suffocates confidence if we let it.

When I changed careers, fear was loud. Worst-case scenarios, relentless “what ifs,” and doubts crept in, trying to derail my confidence as a new business owner.

But here’s what I’ve learned: Fear isn’t the enemy—it’s our prehistoric brain doing its job, trying to keep us safe. The problem? It doesn’t know the difference between danger and growth.

👉 Fear’s not the issue; our relationship with it is.

Fear can be a sign—not of failure, but of how close you are to something big. It’s proof you’re stretching, growing, and challenging yourself.

✨ For 2025, let’s reframe fear. See it as a partner in your growth, not a threat to your confidence. Use it to fuel your progress.

💡 How will you rewrite your fear story next year?