Charlene Lam - Grief Coach

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Portugal
Lisbon
Charlene Lam - Grief Coach

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I help grieving people who are feeling burdened by responsibilities & regrets after the death of a loved one to feel lighter, so they can live their own fullest lives.

30/09/2026

When we experience a major loss, we are often imagining in a way that’s not necessarily helpful for us.

“What could I have done differently?”
“Could I have saved her?”
“Maybe I did that wrong.”
“What if I regret letting go of this item?”

I’m inviting us to use our imaginations for us, to say:

“How might I imagine a life that can still be beautiful, even though I miss them so much?”

“How might I imagine a home that still feels like home, even without my precious pet here?”

“How might I imagine a world that is worth fighting for, that I want to stay for, that I want to build and create?”

“How might I imagine an ongoing relationship with the person that I’ve lost, even though I so desperately want them back?”
..

This was my Curator’s Note during July’s free online gathering of The Grief Gallery. Join us: We meet the last Wednesday of every month on Zoom at 2pm ET, imagining we are in a shared gallery space. Link in bio or at curatinggrief.com/gathering

15/09/2026

The European Grief Conference in Porto was amazing. The weather, the sites, the people, the grief research! And it all started 11 years ago …

Oct 2015, London: I curated my first grief exhibition featuring my mom’s belongings. The start of The Grief Gallery and my Curating Grief practice.

Oct 2024, Lisbon: The Grief Gallery’s first exhibition in Portugal, at the country’s biggest public hospital, Hospital de Santa Maria ULS Santa Maria in partnership with the palliative care team, with major help from nurse Paliativo também é uma palavra 🏥

Now, in Sept 2026 I’m presenting in Porto at the European Grief Conference! Sharing The Grief Gallery with delegates from almost 40 countries. 🎉I’m so proud and I know my mom would be so proud. 🥰

It was amazing connecting with grief scholars, artists, guides and leaders, and seeing mentors and teachers like Mary-Frances O'Connor, Dr. Lucy Selman from Bristol Centre for Grief Research & Engagement, Bob Neimayer and Carolyn Ng from the Portland Institute of Loss and Transition MeaningBridge by Portland Institute for Loss & Transition ❤️

Thank you to the organizers, Bereavement Network Europe, the Danish National Center for Grief Det Nationale Sorgcenter and steering committee members. Thank you to everyone who made this possible, including the Feinglos Fund Rebecca Feinglos PAUSE PAUSE community and of course, Mom.

Excited to bring The Grief Gallery to Germany, Ireland, Denmark, and more places in Portugal and beyond! 🌎🌍🌏

30/08/2026

Celebrating the 1 year anniversary of my talk “What Grief and Soy Sauce Taught Me About Life After Loss.” 🎉Released as a TEDx Editor’s Pick last year, just in time for Grief Awareness Day (Aug 30), it now has over 22,000 views!

Watch on YouTube at curatinggrief.com/tedxtalk

Can you think of someone who might benefit from it? Please do share it with them! 💖

28/08/2026

Grieving is a process of Recontextualizing.
- What is this object without its owner?
- Is it still my mom’s house if she’s dead?
- Who am I without this person?

Again and again, we recontextualize the belongings, the places, the person, and ourselves.

I love what Mary-Frances O'Connor author of The Grieving Brain says about grieving being a learning process. My own brain is still buzzing after our conversation for the Curating Grief Show! 🤓 In the episode, we talk about transitional objects (and allude to what are often called linking objects) and the different roles these items can play for us as grieving people.

My current theory: I believe recontextualizing is part of our learning process as grieving people — and the physical objects can play a helpful role as external items that help us to recontextualize, reconstruct and reorganize internally.

🎥 Watch the episode with Dr. O’Connor on YouTube at curatinggrief.com/show-brain

🎧 Find the Curating Grief Show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify and more.

20/08/2026

Did the belongings take on new meaning for you after a death or major loss? You’re not alone. Dr. Mary-Frances O’Connor, author of The Grieving Brain and The Grieving Body, joined me on the Curating Grief Show. We speak about the objects and what neuroscience and emerging research might tell us about our attachment to them, and how grieving is a learning process.

Watch on YouTube to see the objects Dr. O’Connor shared: curatinggrief.com/show-brain

Or find the Curating Grief Show on Apple Podcasts. Spotify and more.

06/08/2026

Grief is universal. How do we live beautiful, meaningful lives knowing that loss will come? That’s the question I wrote my TEDx talk to answer!

It’s almost a year since my talk was released as a Editor’s Pick. 🎉 It’s been viewed more than 20,000 times, and I believe its message is more relevant than ever. We are living in a time of major loss, both personal and collective, local and global. 💖

🎥 You can watch the full TEDx talk “What Grief and Soy Sauce Taught Me About Life After Loss” on YouTube at curatinggrief.com/tedxtalk

01/07/2026

Grief and joy: I’ve been binging beauty like nobody’s business. Wallowing in the wonder of nature and World Cup wins and losses. Drinking in the details at home, in the city, and by the sea. I think I needed it, this June full of color, texture and restorative energy.

“Oh! The color is so intense it pulls me in. I can almost taste the color.” I’ve been thinking a lot about the origins of Curating Grief, and this Pride Month, I was reminded of a formative experience: Reading “Stone Butch Blues” by Leslie Feinberg in my female sexuality class at UC Berkeley when I was 19. It left a big impression on me about gender identity, all the ways humans can be so cruel to each other, and how moments of beauty, tenderness and connection can get us through the unbearable.

In the semi-autobiographical novel, the protagonist’s friend tells her: “You’re hungry … Your senses are starved.”

I think many of us have been feeling starved. For some of us, starved of hope, joy, connection, the feeling of being cared for, especially by those in charge. If your heart has also been aching for your country, your people, other countries, other people, I’m sending love your way 💖

We need beauty to balance the inherent ugliness of existing in these times of so much loss. We need joy to sustain us, to help us imagine a life worth living and a world worth fighting for.

Sharing some of my recent moments of beauty, in case you might enjoy them too! ☀️🌸

20/06/2026

“I honor my father’s memory by taking amazing care of his child.” Maybe your father figure died. Maybe he’s ill, estranged, geographically or emotionally distant, or just not the dad you deserved. If you’re grieving or missing him, sending lots of love to you and a gentle reminder you are worthy of care. Not just basic care (though we can start there), but exquisite, sumptuous care 💖

18/06/2026

A father’s notebooks. A son’s search for answers. In this poignant clip from our short film Curating Grief: Loss and Objects, London-based filmmaker Jamie Max Lee shares his encounters with his father Torben’s notebooks after he died.

Sending love to everyone who’s missing their dad or parental figure as head toward Father’s Day weekend 💖

07/06/2026

So much grief, and so much joy. Roosevelt Island, in the middle of the East River in NYC. You are missed, Carlo and Peter.

Endereço

Lisbon

Website

http://www.charlenelam.com/

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