Claire Ariela Shen

It's a stormy night outside the shophouse. I'm just waiting for the banana loaves to cool before I call it a night. Taking this time to imagine the customer experience of watching the happenings of our open concept kitchen as well. Looks like there is still some upgrading and reorganisation to do.

There has been a lot of thought that was put into what was urgent to invest in at this point of time and what was less so. It's a little strange as it might seem like the shophouse isn't as glitzy as the new Katong Chagee outlet a few doors down, and sometimes I wonder if this is a little... disgraceful (?) to not have a super pretty typical 200K-investment sort of newly renovated place. But I suppose that'd be the wrong mindset to have.

A critical factor of entrepreneurship (amongst other things) is prudence and wisdom in keeping things financially sustainable. And if that means we don't get our fancy pastry counter till after CNY, and that we try to improve things one step at a time on day at a time, so be it.

Dona Manis is in a new season.
Sometimes it feels as if the business (and customer expectations) are moving faster than I can keep up though. Everyday there is some new challenge that needs to be solved. It takes a lot of energy and emotional stamina, but there is a purpose to all of this.

I am thankful.
I'm choosing to see this as a season of learning and of adventure. Im looking forward to the journeys ahead.

Onward and upward. :)

After the whole saga, along with the nasty rumours, I suppose the part that stung the most were the false stories being shared, and worse, believed.

From accusations of being "big bakery", to rumours that my family were from money, or that we don't know anything about pastry... it was frustrating for me in part because I felt like these untruths stole from all the efforts of my team. I asked myself, "Isn't it obvious how much hard work goes into what we do?" "Why are there people online saying things about my family when they don't actually know us?", "Do I really have to share about how much sacrifice goes into keeping all this alive?"

Then there are nights like these. Nights where I find myself alone, again, just working on a different problem... tonight it's painting a random unfinished wall. Quiet reflections to realize that no one is going to praise you for this work, but you choose to do it anyway - because you know who you are and why it matters to you. Moments that you realize all these random negative voices online that believe fictitious rumours don't actually know who you are and what you stand for.

I took this video because it was just another humbling moment I wanted to remember. As I watched part of it whilst editing, and noticed the oven scars and sugar burns, I am reminded that none of these voices really matter. They don't know my story. They don't know the decades I spent in this industry. They don't have my memories of cleaning flooded toilets, or the many nights (even as a little girl) folding boxes or decorating sugarpaste wedding cakes, or making kuehs or pastries. They don't know the scary seasons of industry bullies and tackling saboteurs, of fighting through financial collapses, or SARS, gangsters, or covid. They don't know the fights, the tears, and the occasional darkness and the wrestle to find light in those seasons. They don't know my nights alone like these.

"If you live for the praises of men, you will die by their criticisms."

There is wisdom in simply choosing to live as a "good and faithful servant" unto God. If there is praise I would like, perhaps it's best from the highest authority.

Full heart of gratitude tonight...

A few weeks ago, even up till this afternoon, I kept worrying. I kept thinking of how things should be perfect before we open, considering what this person or that group of people might think. But now, after taking time to consider how this place looked just two days ago (a dark black-walled and black ceiling, dimly lit bar), and the people who have been making efforts to put things together, and what a blessing this was to even find this place...

We won't start of "perfect" footing, but I am thankful.

We won't start with all the pieces in place..(goodness knows if we will even have our signboard up when we open, and my pastry counter will def take a few weeks..) but I am grateful.

This is the journey of entrepreneurship after all I suppose. Nothing is going to ever be totally perfect, but we will just take things one day at a time, and do what we can one step at a time.

Looking forward to the days ahead.
It's another small step toward a new journey ahead for us.