I made a free challenge for adoptees who want to heal through breathwork! Comment “breathe” and I’ll send it to you 💜
FitFoods with Claire
Supporting and empowering Korean Adoptees and busy professionals through their health transformation. I always had a plan. It was 100% mindset.
Step into your new mindset, take control of your health and fitness, and learn how to gain tons of momentum in life! Here’s the best advice I ever got…
“The best skill in the world is being able to do what you need to do even when you don’t feel like it. If you’re waiting to feel like it, you may never feel like it. The more you practice it, you start actually falling in love with it.” -Jay Shett
Operating as usual
Inviting my KAD friends to this FREE WORKSHOP in collaboration with Robert Holloway
This Crash Course is ideal if you’re a Korean adoptee planning to travel to Korea for the first time. Learn how to navigate Korea confidently and make the most out of your first-hand experience going home for the first time since birth.
In this 1 hour workshop you’ll learn:
● The ins and outs of Korean food - What to expect and where to go for some great bites
● An intro to the Korean language - The history and key phrases so you’re not completely left out
● Everyday etiquette so you’re not left out the loop
1) Annyeonghaseyo? - The History of the Korean Language and Survival Phrases
2) Korean Culture Must-Knows - Greetings, Bowing and Hierarchy
3) At the Dinner Table - Sharing and Drinking Culture
This workshop will be led by Robert Holloway. Robert’s mother is a 60s era Korean adoptee. Robert learned Korean as a second language, is a conference interpreter, and founder of the online Korean language membership community Speak With Seoul.
*Please message me to get the zoom link for this virtual workshop.
Can't wait to see you this Tuesday, Jan 16 8:00pm-9:00pm EST
Celebrating Korean American Day 🇰🇷🇺🇸 honoring our KAD journeys and unique identities 💜
I visited Korea in 2016 and although I did not reunite with family, it felt like I was in reunion with my heritage, my culture, and kin. I visited the Star of the Sea orphanage in Incheon, the place where I left my old life and started a new one. I also visited Seoul, Pyeontek, and Busan.
This was the first time I remember embracing both my Korean and American identities. It was the first time I became aware that I had lost something since my adoption and came to live in the US. I felt like I lost my birthplace, my culture, my language, my family, my people. But in my loss of Korea, I also gained my American identity. A new family, a new life. I spent almost 4 decades feeling divided between both identities, even when it wasn’t a conscious thought, I felt it.
I believe that my trip to Korea was the beginning of my awakening and journey towards self acceptance and self love.
To all my friends who share this journey, I am here for you and I’m cheering you on🥰💜💕
My Korean Food Journey: How It Shaped My Korean adoptee Identity
I’m going to tell you a story about food. My story isn’t just a food story, but I’d like to take you on a journey of how a Korean adoptee like me, transformed my identity completely.
If you asked me about my relationship to Korean food, I would probably say “It’s complicated.” Growing up, I don’t remember eating it, cooking it, or even seeing any Korean restaurants around me where I lived. Even if I did, I most likely would have rejected the idea of eating it, just like I rejected other aspects of my Koreanness, mostly due to feeling ashamed of that part of my identity.
I was adopted from Korea as a baby into a white American family and grew up in a predominantly white community. My Mom’s family is Irish and my Dad’s family is German. So I remember eating lots of baked potatoes and shake and bake chicken. I was never even introduced to Korean food by my adoptive family - I'm puzzled by this because as us kids grew up we enjoyed eating many other ethnic foods like Chinese, Japanese, Thai, and Indian food.
Now, looking back at how I viewed myself, sadly I didn’t identify as Korean at all. I felt embarrassed, ashamed, and maybe, subconsciously, refused to acknowledge my Koreanness. Maybe it was the bullying I faced growing up, the microaggressions, or maybe it was my fear of abandonment, rejection, or not being seen, heard, or validated. Perhaps it was all of those. But what I remembered was that I had this intense desire to fit into white American culture and society. I wanted to look white, act white, be accepted by white people, and not stick out… I felt like a chameleon and became great at passing and code switching when I needed to. But it wasn’t until I actually looked in the mirror that I saw that I wasn’t actually white…I saw just how Korean I really looked.
The first time I remember eating Korean food was after I went to college and my boyfriend took me to a Korean BBQ restaurant. I remember tasting kimchi for the first time and I loved it so much I cried! And I loved all the banchan- side dishes- that covered the entire table and loved how they each tasted so unique but also so familiar in an odd way. I can remember my first taste of kimchi jjigae as I slurped it from my silver spoon, mixing it with rice, and thinking how it was the best thing I’d ever tasted- warm, spicy, flavorful, and oh so comforting!
What I didn’t love about my first experience with Korean food was the unexpected way that the Korean ladies who worked in the restaurant made me feel so bad about not being able to speak Korean, or not even knowing what the dishes were called. They actually scolded me, as my actions they felt were disrespectful to them. I felt so ashamed about the whole thing that I was afraid to go back there again.
During my college years, I made many Korean friends and they would spoil me with bringing me homemade kimbap, bulgogi, and kimchi which I absolutely loved! When I was pregnant with my daughter, I remember craving Korean food so much and although I couldn’t quite place my finger on the feeling at the time, I can now say that it made me feel connected to my birth mother in a wonderful, warm, loving way. My friend Youmee would come over and make me Korean food often and I would cry when eating it because it felt so comforting and made me feel like I was deeply cared for.
And after my daughter was born, I can remember going to eat Korean food together often and it delighted me that she loved it as much as I did. Korean food is definitely one of the ways we have bonded over the years and it has helped shape both of our identities.
But for some reason, I never learned to cook Korean food and I never learned to speak Korean. The weird thing is, I think that I am a very good cook and I learned how to cook many other types of asian cuisine including Japanese, Thai, Indian, Vietnamese…so many other wonderful types of foods but not Korean. Was this because I hadn’t fully accepted my Korean identity?
As I continue to explore my Korean identity, I am starting to seek out and connect with other Korean adoptees, who I have learned, share similar feelings around learning to cook Korean food. Many of us seem to have this block when it comes to learning or being able to cook it. For some, it’s lack of resources or access to Asian markets which allow them to get the right ingredients. For others, it’s feeling afraid to try something totally foreign and not wanting to f*ck it up. But the biggest challenge seems to be the shame many of us have all carried about not feeling “Korean enough”. Like we haven’t yet earned the right to cook it because it feels like we are imposters in some way.
One of the most empowering moments of my adoptee journey was when I had the awareness that I could rewrite my own adoption story. And take back my power. Just by talking about it and sharing my own version of my story, I could remove the part where I am not “Korean enough” and remove the shame around my Korean identity. This new season of my life has brought me to new personal growth adventures…and my quest to learn to cook Korean food!
Instead of waiting to have someone teach me to cook Korean food, I made a conscious effort to go out and create a community of other Korean adoptees who want to learn to cook Korean food together. I started a Korean adoptee cooking group and started hosting online cooking classes where we come together to connect over food and we chat about everything related to being a Korean adoptee!
Since we started cooking together, we have explored making spicy cucumbers, mung beans, steamed egg, kimchi pancakes, tteokbokki, kimchi jjigae, rice cake soup and japchae! This weekend we will attempt to make homemade kimchi. I absolutely love kimchi and eat it everyday because of the many health benefits!
I’m learning so much about my rich culture and heritage through food and I’m really embracing my new Korean adoptee community. I can say my journey has taught me to finally love and appreciate my Korean adoptee identity. I can be proud of both my Korean and American identity and I can’t wait to see where my Korean food journey takes me!
Do you love cooking Korean food too? What are some of your favorite Korean dishes?
If you asked me about my relationship to Korean food, I would probably say “It’s complicated” 😅
Growing up, I don’t remember eating it, cooking it, or even seeing any Korean restaurants around me where I lived. Even if I did, I most likely would have rejected the idea of eating it, just like I rejected other aspects of my Koreanness, mostly due to feeling ashamed of that part of my identity.
The first time I remember eating Korean food was after I went to college and my boyfriend took me to a Korean BBQ restaurant. I remember tasting kimchi for the first time and I loved it so much! And I loved all the banchan that covered the entire table and loved how they each tasted so unique but so familiar in an odd way.
What I didn’t love about my first experience with Korean food was the unexpected way that the Korean ladies who worked in the restaurant made me feel so bad about not being able to speak Korean, and not even knowing what the dishes were called. I felt so ashamed about the whole thing that I was afraid to go back there again.
During my college years, I made many Korean friends and they would spoil me with bringing me home made kimbap, bulgogi, and kimchi which I absolutely loved! When I was pregnant with my daughter, I remember craving Korean food so much and although I couldn’t quite place my finger on the feeling at the time, I can now say that it made me feel connected to my birth mother in a wonderful, warm, loving way.
My good friend Youmee would come over and make me Korean food and I would cry when eating it because it felt so comforting. And after my daughter was born, I can remember going to eat Korean food together often and it delighted me that she loved it as much as I did.
But for some reason, I never learned to cook Korean food and I never learned to speak Korean. The weird thing is, I learned how to cook many other types of asian cuisine- Japanese, Thai, Vietnamese…so many other wonderful types of food but not Korean.
I am just now starting to connect with other Korean adoptees, who I am learning share similar feelings around learning to cook Korean food. Many of us seem to have this block when it comes to learning or being able to cook it. For some, it’s lack of resources or access to get the right ingredients. Others, it’s feeling afraid to try something totally foreign and not wanting to f*ck it up. But the biggest challenge seems to be the shame we have all carried about not feeling “Korean enough”. Like we haven’t yet earned the right to cook it because it feels like we are imposters in some way.
One of the most empowering moments of my life was when I had the awareness that I could rewrite my own adoption story. Just by talking about it and sharing my own version of my story, I could remove the part where I am not “Korean enough” and remove the shame around my Korean identity. This new season of my life has brought me to new adventures…and my quest to learn to cook Korean food! I even started a group of other Korean adoptees who want to learn and support each other through cooking together virtually.
Check out my very first attempts to cook Tteokbokki, Kimchi Jjigae, and some banchan (side dishes). I really enjoy Maanchi’s cooking videos so I am mostly using her recipes. If you are a Korean adoptee and would like to join us on this cooking adventure, I’d love to become friends 🙂
Send me a message and I’ll add you to my Korean Adoptee Cooking Group!
What are your favorite Korean foods?
For those adoptees who enjoy journaling and would like to explore your adoptee identity a bit more, I would love to send you a free copy of my workbook with journaling prompts!
Embracing Identity: A Journey of Self-Discovery for Transracial and Transnational Adoptees
Tap the link in my bio to download your journal today!
I’m still on my journey of discovering and coming to terms with my own adoption story. It’s been a battle discovering my identities finding out who I really am.
What I’ve learned is that sharing my story with others and hearing about other adoptee stories have helped to validate my feelings and help me to lose some of the shame I’ve felt my whole life.
These journaling prompts have pushed me to turn inward and question everything!
What are you looking to discover about yourself?
Comment “JOURNAL” and I’ll send you the free pdf!
My beautiful Jolie tied the knot this weekend! My heart is so happy for her and her amazing husband Jonah. Wishing them a lifetime of happiness together 💜💜💜
How do transracial adoptees come to terms with feelings of loss and shame?
Simon Benn, host of The Thriving Adoptees Podcast and I take a deep dive into issues like mental health, how stress and trauma manifests in the body, and overcoming limiting beliefs.
Coming out of the fog, surviving single parent life, and a big wake up call after being diagnosed with diabetes… I share how I transformed myself from surviving to thriving as I get vulnerable and real about my struggles.
Connect with Simon at [email protected] if you'd like to have a chat about being a guest on the show.
Listen to this podcast episode and others here and please share it with someone who needs to hear my message.
Many of you know that I recently became a Certified Jay Shetty Life Coach and my mission is to guide and support adoptees who are coming out of the fog to empower themselves so they can find inner peace and alignment within their body and mind.
After coaching many adoptees during my practicum, I have noticed a common pattern among them and wanted to highlight this because it’s such an important part of the healing journey. All of them have and are still experiencing stress/pain/chronic illness in their bodies. Whether or not we have connected it to our adoption trauma, it is something that we all want to release in order to start feeling our best.
Healing and letting go of trauma and stress that has become somatically manifested in the body can be a complex process, but it's essential for one's overall well-being, inner peace, and alignment within ourselves.
Here are 9 strategies that may help:
1. **Therapy**: Consider seeking the help of a therapist, particularly one who specializes in adoption trauma or somatic experiencing. Therapy can provide a safe space to explore and process the underlying causes of the stress and trauma.
2. **Coaching**: Coach and client partner with each other so the client can overcome obstacles on the path to their goals. The coach sees the client as whole, complete, and resourceful. By meeting them where they are at, the coach empowers the client to discover their inner wisdom so they can create the changes they need to have in order to maintain long lasting transformation.
3. **Mindfulness and Meditation**: Mindfulness techniques can help you become more aware of bodily sensations and emotions. This increased awareness can be a first step in releasing stored tension.
4. **Exercise**: Regular physical activity can reduce stress hormones in the body and promote the release of endorphins, which are natural mood lifters.
5. **Journaling**: Keeping a journal to express your thoughts and feelings can be a therapeutic way to process and release pent-up emotions.
6. **Self-compassion**: Be kind to yourself throughout this process. Healing from trauma and releasing somatic manifestations can take time, and setbacks can happen.
7. **Social Support**: Talk to friends, family, or support groups. Sharing your experiences and feelings with others can be both validating and healing.
8. **Nutrition and Sleep**: Pay attention to your diet and get enough rest. A well-nourished and well-rested body is better equipped to handle stress.
9. **Somatic Breathwork **: This is designed to release stress and trauma stored in the body through movement and expression. This practice allows you to go into areas where you are holding onto things, areas where you feel triggered and use the breath to clear out the stress and things that are blocking you from feeling inner peace and freedom.
It's important to remember that healing is a personal journey, and what works for one person may not work the same way for another.
But one thing I know is that coming to terms with our feelings, emotions, and realizations about our adoption experience (coming out of the fog) is a mind AND body experience!
Let me know which strategies you already practice and which ones you need some help with.
***I’m giving away a 100% FREE Discovery Coaching Session to help you get started towards your healing journey. I would be happy to help as many people as I can at this stage, so I am giving this chance first to my network. Just click the link below also in my profile to book a discovery call with me.
I’m officially a certified Jay Shetty Coach!! I’m feeling pretty good 🤩
Thank you to everyone who supported me along the way, especially to all my clients who believed in me and took a chance.
I’m excited to live my purpose of serving others and bring more love to our world 💜
I’m excited to invite you to my virtual retreat!
This retreat is designed for you if:
✅ You are looking to start up (or get back to) a morning routine with better habits so you can start feeling motivated, inspired, and more in control of your health
✅ You want to learn how practicing meditation, breath work, and moving your body can reduce your stress, manage anxiety, and help you to feel better
✅ You have some bad habits (no judgement here) and you want to replace them with healthier ones
✅ You struggle with your weight, eating healthy, mindset, or just need to make a lifestyle change
✅ You would love a community of support and encouragement, plus a bit of accountability to stick to your routine and boost your confidence
My personal commitment to you is to meet you where you are now and get you heading in the right direction 💜🤗
Please DM me your email address to register today!
Some days I eat healthy, stick to a plan, and eat according to my health goals…
And other days I eat pizza, ice cream, and drink wine.
It’s called balance and it keeps me from going crazy over not being “allowed” to eat certain foods.
It’s called being mindful of what I’m putting into my body and accepting that I’m in control of how I want to feel inside my body.
It’s called not eating like an a**hole.
I love food and food loves me! 😋
What’s your favorite food?
Posting this because someone may need to hear it.
If you don’t make the time to create a life that you want, you will eventually have to start spending more time dealing with a life that you don’t want in the future.
So if you think you are on the wrong path, there’s nothing stopping you from deciding to turn around now.
It’s never to late to set new goals 🙌🏽🙌🏽
Do you agree?
Is your negative thinking the reason why it’s impossible to get rid of your bad habits?
YOU CREATE THE REALITY YOU WANT WITH THE THINGS YOU TELL YOURSELF
What current beliefs and mantras do you tell yourself which are unhelpful or negative?
EX: I always eat junk food, I need a drink to help me unwind, I can never wake up on time, I always hit the snooze button, I can’t stop worrying or overthinking, I’m so out of shape and I can’t get motivated to workout.
You need to train your brain to think the opposite way, so you start creating your dream reality.
If you are constantly thinking about what you don’t want to happen, your subconscious mind will align your actions with your fears.
By constantly thinking about what you DO WANT, you are reprogramming your brain and your actions will start to align with your new desired identity.
Do this 👇👇👇
Create a new mantra that aligns with who you want to become and what new habits you want to have. This will be in the present tense and short, to the point.
Choose powerful, positively charged words that feel energized, hopeful, inspired.
What will your new mantra be?
The BEST motivation for showing up for your workouts every day is to practice the HIGH-5 method!
Congratulate yourself with a high-5 after your workout and just bask in that DOPAMINE!!
Beating yourself up or getting down on yourself when you get off track is counterproductive, but this will help you keep your motivation up!
I wish I knew this when I was younger:
When you love yourself, you inevitably do things you love.
When you treat yourself with respect, you do respectable things.
And when you celebrate yourself, you do things worth celebrating.
If you look in the mirror and don’t see a person worth celebrating, isn’t it time to change that?
Did you high-5 yourself today yet? 🖐
It all starts with self love 💜
Do you agree?
Let me tell you a story about my struggle with mindset and how I overcame it and ended up here in Thailand…
I think we all struggle from time to time and it takes work to get back on track.
But here are a few simple things that I did which made all the difference 👇👇👇
It was a simple mindset shift that I made. I realized that in order to align my actions and behaviors with the healthy lifestyle I had created for myself, I had to start BEING that person who I imagined I could be. I realized that NO ONE was coming to save me and that I HAD to start DOING what I teach my clients to do.
And that is BE the person I want to become. I started visualizing the badass woman who is lives free, the person who is the light for so many other people, and who takes control of her actions in order to put herself in the best possible environment to thrive.
I started journaling, meditating, and just moving my body more. I remembered all my simple habit hacks that I had learned to keep me moving forward, in the right direction. I kept going, and telling myself that although I wasn’t where I wanted to be, I was taking action everyday to become the person I was meant to be.
I manifested my dream life and I started attracting more abundance and opportunity into my life as a result.
I believed in myself, gained back my confidence, signed my next client, and booked my trip to Thailand!
This is how I was able to change my life just with one simple mindset shift. Nothing drastic or crazy…but this stuff really works!
If you are wondering if you can change your life, turn your negative mindset or struggles into positive ones, and reach goals that you haven’t been able to reach all your life, the answer is YES YOU CAN!
Start by focusing on who you are becoming rather than what you need to do.
Start by doing the simple stuff like journaling, meditating, having more compassion for yourself and others.
Start with healthier habits and setting good intentions each day.
Just start doing something and moving forward towards your goals.
Before you know it, you will be making big progress and you will be on your way to changing your life for the better!
Can you relate?
Health does not always come from medicine.
Most of the time, it comes from peace of mind, peace in the heart, peace in the soul.
It comes from laughter and love.
Sending you peace, love, and happiness from Thailand ✌️💜🏖
When was the last time worry ever solved a problem?
Breathe and know that you are perfect in this moment.
Slow down, relax, appreciate just how far you’ve come in your journey, and take a moment to celebrate your wins no matter how small they seem.
Breathe in….breathe out….
Try to be present and gain awareness of each of your 5 senses.
Do this exercise for becoming present… stop what you’re doing and identify these things:
5 things you can see
4 things you can hear
3 things you can feel
2 things you can smell
1 thing you can taste
Great job…now carry on and don’t forget that you are AMAZING my friends 🥰
Let me know if you needed this today!
5 tips for motivation 👇👇👇
“People say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing. That’s why we recommend it daily.” - Zig Ziglar
1. Pick 3 goals each day and make them a priority. Do not do anything else except these three things so be sure they are realistic daily goals or tasks. Checking these off your list will be even more rewarding when you allow yourself to celebrate!
2. Wake up and force yourself to get up out of bed on time. Do not hit the snooze button because this sets the tone of your day and you will be playing catch up all day long. If you struggle with this, count down 5…4…3…2…1 and go! We all need to push ourselves and do uncomfortable things in order to grow.
3. Try to delay looking at your phone for as long as possible in the morning. It’s a distraction from what you need to be doing and it will start to make you reactive to things like emails, the news, and alerts rather than taking action towards your own goals.
4. Set a morning routine and stick with it every single day. For example, make your bed. Take a cold shower. Meditate and set your intentions for the day. People don’t determine their futures, they determine their behaviors and their behaviors determine their future.
5. Do more things that you love! If you love traveling then promise yourself a trip after you hit a goal. Or if you love coffee then reward yourself with one after you complete a task that you dread doing. That dopamine is an amazing way to motivate you, just don’t hold out for it only when you hit those big goals.
Congratulate yourself with a high-5 every time you take a small step forward. This will help you to enjoy the process and not quit.
How do you stay motivated?
If you are struggling with low energy, do these 4 things 👇👇
✅ Get better sleep
✅ Step up your nutrition
✅ Take a cold plunge
✅ Change your environment
Which one will you try today?
Let me know! 😀
One of the most important lessons I’ve learned during my journey is this👇👇👇
I don’t have to do EVERYTHING in order to feel like I’m winning.
Sure, it feels great checking off tons of things from your to-do list, but the most important things are the small things we do for ourselves.
This allows us to show up better in life- for ourselves AND for others.
These are the things that impact my health the most and make me feel like I’m winning in life🙌🏽🙌🏽
Are you ready to feel like you’re winning too?
Send me a DM and let’s chat🤗
Why I stopped apologizing to everyone…
Years ago, I was sitting at the bar at Cheesecake Factory with my ex (we had been together for a few years and had recently gotten engaged).
We were both happy to be together, unwinding on a Friday night after a tough week.
The bar was buzzing with lots of good vibes and happy chit chatter.
Just after we finished our first round of drinks and our appetizer, he hit me with the most devastating words I could imagine…
“I’m being considered for a job out of state and I may be moving away.”
It was as if someone had just told me my grandmother, favorite Kindergarten teacher, best friend, and my favorite pet had all just died, and then proceeded to punch me in the stomach.
It was in that second, all of my fears - fear of abandonment, fear of rejection, fear of not being good enough, fear of not being worthy - all of them took over and I just crumbled in to a big puddle of tears, grief, anger, resentment, and hurt.
I had to leave the restaurant, and even after I got home, I cried for hours and hours, unable to get control of my emotions.
It wasn’t until after we ended our relationship and I had years of healing and personal development under my belt that I realized why I had reacted the way I did.
I had been living my life as someone else, wearing a mask of someone who I didn’t recognize.
I had been so worried about being “perfect”and living up to everyone else’s expectations.
I had been apologizing my whole life for not being who I thought others wanted me to be.
I had been under the illusion that other people’s opinions of me mattered more than my own.
I was living in fear that if people found out who I really was, they would leave me.
Well, guess what?
I was finally “found out” and THANK GOD I no longer have to wear that mask!
Today, I am free to be whoever I feel like being.
And, I have to say I like it this way. I am just me - imperfect, honest, and free.
No apologies or f***s given.
So, are you ready to take off your mask?
If you’re considering it, I will say that it’s the BEST feeling in the world!
Let me know if you agree 🥰
We get programmed from an early age to think that something or someone is going to come “save” us or magically change our lives.
You know what’s super awesome?
Someone CAN come along and change your situation and help you achieve your goals.
And that person is YOU!
YOU are the person that has to decide to change.
YOU are the one who has gotten in your own way…until now.
YOU will make it happen, and YOU should be proud of all your positive changes!
I believe in YOU!!!
Does this resonate?
Have an amazing day everyone 🥰💕
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