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Emotional Regulation Coach
I help couples, parents, and leaders regulate their emotions so they can create the best relationships of their lives with the people they care about the most.
09/03/2026
Why successful people struggle with anxiety -- Brainz Magazine interviewed me on this topic recently and my answers might catch you off guard.
Successful people struggle with anxiety for reasons you may not expect.
You can check out the interview here: https://www.brainzmagazine.com/post/why-successful-people-struggle-with-anxiety-an-interview-with-coach-coleman-housefield
09/02/2026
You are the actual threat and you’re creating emotions in your body with what you’re thinking, mostly unconsciously.
If you feel anxious often, you are not safe with you.
If you feel overwhelmed regularly, you are not safe with you.
Still not convinced? Let me give you a few examples that you can relate to and connect with in your own life.
You don’t feel safe with you may surface in your own life as:
- I can never get it right, my husband or wife is always pointing out my flaws
- My boss is disappointed in my work and now I feel overwhelmed and anxious
It’s not actually your spouse or your boss that you don’t feel safe with, it’s you.
Read the whole story -> https://colemanhousefield.substack.com/p/theres-no-such-thing-as-selfless?r=3lwl99&utm_campaign=post-expanded-share&utm_medium=web
Photo by Michael Fenton on Unsplash
08/31/2026
There’s no such thing as selfless actions or selfless people, it’s a myth.
There are only two options:
- Self absorbed and Narcissistic
- Selfish in the service of others
Full article -> https://colemanhousefield.substack.com/p/theres-no-such-thing-as-selfless?r=3lwl99&utm_campaign=post-expanded-share&utm_medium=web
Photo by Michael Fenton on Unsplash
Why emotional pain feels like a threat and dangerous to you.
Listen to the full conversation -> https://colemanhousefield.substack.com/p/how-emotional-regulation-works-live?r=3lwl99&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web
08/25/2026
Recently my dad, (my son’s grandpa) offered to take my son and his cousins to the museum.
He didn’t say which museum and my son has been to some fun museums so he was really excited to go.
When my son returned home from the museum I noticed he seemed bummed so I asked him how it went.
Tears started falling down his little 8 year old cheeks and he said, “it wasn’t fun, it was boring”. My son had such high expectations for the museum experience and reality just did not live up to what he anticipated.
I have two ways that I would historically respond to my kids in this state:
Make it about selfishness and a lack of gratitude - You should be grateful your grandfather took you to the museum. You’re so ungrateful. Lots of kids would love to go to a museam with their grandpa!
Try to rescue my kids from the uncomfortable emotions asap (because I’m feeling uncomfortable with their discomfort) - It’s okay buddy, I’ll take you to a fun museum later this week. Or maybe we can do something fun this afternoon after I’m done with work.
In each of these approaches I’m completely missing my son. I’m missing that it’s not about selfishness or a lack of gratitude.
It’s not about rescuing him from the discomfort of disappointment (although that may be what he thinks he wants in the moment).
What my son needs most in this moment is a dad who can sit with him in the emotions that he’s feeling and be okay with it.
Read the full story -> https://colemanhousefield.substack.com/p/the-hardest-and-best-thing?r=3lwl99&utm_campaign=post-expanded-share&utm_medium=web
Photo by Vimar Martinez on Unsplash
08/24/2026
For all 3 of my children I’ve noticed a pattern: they avoid the emotional pain or discomfort from someone else.
When Abby and I are having an argument, my kids leave the room.
When one of their siblings is crying, they try to put as much distance between them and their sibling as possible.
When one of their siblings is having an angry tirade, they leave the room immediately.
This isn’t learned behavior, this is instinct.
This is their nervous system detecting a threat and signaling them to move away from the threat to somewhere safer.
It’s survival instincts.
What’s interesting is the pattern is completely different for physical injuries.
When my kids notice that one of their siblings is hurt physically they often lean in and try to help or come get me or my wife.
There seems to be something about emotional pain without a physical injury that instinctively causes them to move away.
I think it’s because emotional pain in someone else feels unsolvable.
Read the full story -> https://colemanhousefield.substack.com/p/youre-not-running-away-from-them?r=3lwl99&utm_campaign=post-expanded-share&utm_medium=web
Photo by Chris Nemeth on Unsplash
Your beliefs form in the body and you don't even know it.
We don't realize we have a choice but we do when it comes to what we think and feel.
The thoughts you have an repeat that feel terrible are optional.
I'll show you how you can change a toxic, repetitive thought to something that helps you create the results you want.
Start here -> https://www.colemanhousefield.com/
Full video episode here -> https://colemanhousefield.substack.com/p/how-emotional-regulation-works-live?r=3lwl99
The hardest part of parenting is remaining calm when your kid is losing it.
08/12/2026
You are at all times responsible for how you behave and what you choose to say.
You are not responsible for how someone else feels because you’re not that powerful.
Full Article -> https://colemanhousefield.substack.com/p/youre-not-that-powerful?r=3lwl99&utm_campaign=post-expanded-share&utm_medium=web
Photo by Karsten Würth on Unsplash