Feels and Heals Yoga+

Hi friends👋🏼 been a while since I’ve surfaced here.

A lot of things in my life have changed: I got married. I moved to Minessota! I’ve picked up a few cats, a few diagnoses (with just as many unknowns), and more than a few hobbies (as I’ve had to let go of others).

I continue to be a medical mystery & my symptoms continue to be as unpredictable and affecting all of my life as the Midwest weather. But if yoga has taught me anything over these years, is that change is our only constant. My body has changed. My abilities have changed. My situation has changed.

Among the grief of losing pieces of myself and so many things I’ve loved to chronic illness and disability (including teaching), I’ve also gained perspective, compassion, and new interests and hobbies!

Listen, I will be real with you: it’s taken me a long time to overcome the shame of quitting teaching (among other things my body’s decline has forced me to quit), especially as a former “gifted & talented” kid & child of immigrant (iykyk 🙃)

And as a recovering perfectionist, it’s also me taken forever to overcome the not being immediately good at something and the also quitting it immediately (see above) and make bad art. And then choose to share said bad art with all of you.

But listen I didn’t spend years preaching to all of you in my classes to radically accept yourself where you’re at that day to then turn around and not do that for myself (and it’s a challenge, believe me).

So here I am: I may not be teaching you yoga Asana anymore, but I can still impart yoga wisdom for all of us, (myself included). Just off the mat( for now… as I said change is constant and none of us know the future).

I plan to use this account to show off my various adhd art projects/current interests, show both the shadow side of living with multiple chronic, and often disabling, illnesses & the humor I find in it all (because balance), and my lessons in learning to divest of the perfectionist “grind” mindset capitalism indoctrinated us all into. Now I recognize that this is all very different than many of y’all followed me for. If you no longer connect with this connect, that’s totally fair, I wish you well.⬇️⬇️

If you’ve ever done a class with me, you know I tell you you are inherently worthy of rest in pretty much every class.

What I don’t tell you often is how hard it is to apply that principal to myself. However between my health issues, the ongoing pandemic I can’t ignore because of said health issues, and just feeling burnt out and uninspired because capitalism likes to suck the joy out of things, I’ve decided to take a break from teaching for now.

It was a really hard decision that has caused me a lot of tears and anxiety. But it’s become clear I need to put my physical & mental health first & prioritize my own practice+healing for now. I’m hoping this isn’t a forever goodbye, but one of the many wonderful things yoga has taught me is to embrace the discomfort, including the unknown that comes with change.

During this sabbatical, I’ll be reconnecting with my own practice and looking into ways I can still provide accessible offerings in a way that’s sustainable to me and my chronic illness. I want to find that joy of yoga again without the pressure to constantly produce & churn out content and find ways to monetize it. At the same time, I want to spread the benefits of this practice to all who may need or want them and can’t access them in a traditional yoga class sedating for a variety of reasons.

This also means I’ll probably move away from the Patreon model to something easier & lower pressure to keep up with for me. Leaning toward Ko-fi or Buy Me a Coffee. If you have any experience with either, please let me know in the comments, I’m torn.

As part of this break (and due to a recent Covid exposure) I’m canceling this month’s class at and also pausing that offering through at least the summer. I will keep y’all updated.

A million thank you to all of you who have come to class, virtually or in person, supported me on Patreon or shared my work. I’m forever grateful to you & want to show up in a sustainable way for all of us in the future. Let me know in the comments if you still want the option for in-person classes at GGF. What are barriers to coming to class, what you’d like to see, etc.

More soon 💖

Practicing showing up for myself, perfectly imperfect, but just showing up. Here with here for ’s class.

Ever sense I started teaching (which I love!) my personal practice kind of fell away. Everything became about what I think my students may need or what other teachers here are doing and how I can stand out from the noise.

I also got sick last year. You’ve probably seen I’ve been way less active here. Navigating chronic illness, disability, and getting way more trauma from the medical system but no answers has taken a toll. I’ve felt disconnected from myself and my body and my community. Even worse I’ve been so annoyed with this sweet, precious body just doing the best it can for not being able to do more. Beating myself up for not being able to do more. For not having the capacity to show up here as much as I used to, and failing into obscurity with the algorithm. For not being able to show up to teach as consistently as I used to. For not being able to move and practice how I used to.

And then I remember the beauty in change this practice has taught me. The resilience. The being able yo show up just as I am in the moment & to practice non-judgment. The no harm philosophy of ahimsa.

I’m not big on New Year’s resolutions, but I do like setting intentions, and my intention this year is just to show up as I am & treating myself with kindness, meeting myself where I am. Or at the very least not judging myself if it’s different than what I want or where I used to be.

Showing up on my mat to connect with myself. To just breathe for a few minutes. To meet myself where I’m at and knowing that’s more than enough. To prioritize rest, knowing that rest IS often one of the best ways to show up for ourselves.

I invite you to meet yourself where you are too. To make rest and connection with yourself a priority. I’ll meet you here, on your own terms 💖

Happy holidays, no matter how you are or aren’t celebrating! Check the link in bio for a little grounding session if you’re having a tough time this holigay season.

Then join me in the new year at on Monday, January 2 at 6 pm to create space to process the past year, release anything you want to let go of, and invite in intentions for your new year.

As always, class is sliding scale, pay what you can with $5-15 suggested donation & no one turned away. Bring your mat and props if you have them! If not, I have some to borrow, and please wear your masks covering nose and mouth to keep each other safe. Register by emailing [email protected] to attend.

***ryoga ***rnc ***ryogateacher ***rsboro

Need some post-one-holiday-with-another-right-around-the-corner self care? I’ve got you.

For many q***r folks, time with birth family can be complex, with lots of difficult emotions and triggers to work around. It can also be non-existent, bringing up a whole other level of grief.

Come meet yourself with compassion on the mag, work through those big feelings, and decompress on Monday, December 5, 6-7pm at for our final Rainbow Yoga session of the year!

As always, by donation, and please wear a mask! Bring a mat if you have one but if not, I’ve got some to borrow. Email link 🔝to register.

Not local/can’t make it/aren’t into in-person events rn? The sessions are always recorded for my Patreon, which is no min/pay what you can per month. Also linked 🔝

***ryoga ***ryogateacher

Link in bio for your on-the-go practice to take with you this holiday season.

Take care of yourselves fam 💖🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

Join in for an inclusive, all levels heart opening practice Monday, November 7 at 6 pm at

$5-15 suggested donation (but not required). Please keep wearing your mask to class to keep our community safe. Email me to register. (Hit email below the bio!)

Can’t make it or not participating in in-person events? Class is recorded and available on my Patreon (link in bio).

***ryoga ***rnc ***ryogateacher

Back for our regularly scheduled class at ! Join me at 6 pm on Monday, October 3 as we celebrate the changing of the season and welcome internal changes on our mat.

$5-15 suggested donation (but not required). Please keep wearing your mask to class to keep our community safe. Email me to register.

***ryoga ***rnc

Save the date! Next month, will be on the second Tuesday, September 13 at 6 pm at because of the first Monday being a holiday. (Typically when we can’t do first Monday, we’ll aim for second Tuesday.)

As always, class is available to anyone who needs or wants! $5-15 suggested donation but not required. Bring your mat if you have one, and don’t forget to wear your mask! We keep each other safe 💖

Email [email protected] to sign up!

***ryoga ***ryogateacher

Wanted to share my big life update with y’all since I’ve been a little quiet here. (Part of healing is just living life! Who knew lol)

1.) I got engayged during the last weekend of Pride month & started a new job! (See my Patreon link for a class themed about embracing change!

2.) it’s and y’all are welcome to perceive & appreciate all the happening in these gorgeous engagement photos by the fellow enby talented photographer !

Right now it’s hard not to feel overwhelmed and helpless at all the injustice happening in the world. Our nervous systems are flooded. We have been traumatized over and over by people in power through the years.

I, along with my small but mighty community, have been tapping into systems of self and community care, our resources and talents to see how we can act in a way that helps the collective without burning out and exhausting our own resources.

As some of you may know, I have a small creative venture called Make My Gay] with my partner . When the SCOTUS draft leaked, we created this sticker with 100% of the profits split between and . We were able to donate $500 to each from our first batch of sticker sales. Now we’re re-stocked and ready to sell again to donate to these orgs.

Please consider buying a sticker or just liking, sharing, saving, or otherwise interacting with this post on Make My Gay]

Hi friends, with the July 4th holiday celebrations downtown and many folks being out of town, this month’s yoga will take place at 6 pm on Tuesday, July 2 at . Next month, we’ll be back to the 1st Monday of the month schedule.

Email [email protected] to register. As always class is by suggested donation $5-15, and no one is turned away from inability to pay. Come as you are, and let’s explore movement and meditation on the mat.

***rsboro