Colorado Wild Botanicals

09/10/2026

09/10/2026

THE EMERGENCY AT CREEK SECTOR as reported by Amos, Head of Goat Security

I knew we had trouble before Pamela did.

This is not unusual.

Pamela is a capable woman and generally does a satisfactory job around
the ranch, but she has certain limitations. For one thing, she cannot
smell worth a hoot. For another, she was in the house.

I was conducting the morning security inspection when I detected an
emergency at Creek Sector. One of the Large White Personnel had gotten
herself into the water and was not conducting herself like a normal
goat.

I issued the Emergency Pamela Summons.

WOOF! WOOF! WOOF!

There are several barks in my professional vocabulary. There is Stranger Danger.
There is Goats Where Goats Are Not Supposed to Be. There is Something Moved in the Brush and I Am Investigating. And there is
PAMELA, GET OUT HERE NOW.

I used the last one.

It worked.

Pamela appeared wearing what I believe humans call Emergency
Creek-Rescue Clothing. It was very thin and did not appear particularly
well suited to the assignment.

She went down the bank.

I attempted to accompany her, but at this point Ranch Management
encountered a serious equipment failure.

BZZZT.

I stopped.

The goat was in trouble.

I advanced.

BZZZT.

I reconsidered.

I advanced again.

BZZZT!

There are times in the life of a Head of Goat Security when duty
requires sacrifice. There are also times when an invisible fence makes a
persuasive counterargument.

I maintained command from the nearest authorized position.

Pamela got into the creek. The water was deep. The bank was slick. The goat was approximately the size of a small buffalo and had somehow gotten herself underneath the board that sensible goats walk across
instead of underneath.

This is why goats require supervision.

Pamela pulled. The goat struggled. Pamela rested. Then she pulled some
more.

I barked encouragement and attempted several times to explain that I was
available for immediate deployment if someone would kindly turn off the electricity.

Eventually Pamela got the goat over the board and onto the bank.

This took a long time.

I would have done it faster, but I have no thumbs.

Once Pamela had moved the goat outside the Restricted Electrical Zone, I
was finally permitted to inspect the casualty.

I smelled her from one end to the other.

Wet.

Goat.

Alive.

I licked her thoroughly to make certain.

Then I lay down between the goat and Pamela's feet and put my head on
the ground.

The situation was under control.

The goat was alive.

Pamela was alive.

I was alive, although parts of me had recently been informed rather
strongly about property boundaries.

I remained on duty until the goat was safely returned to the lower paddock.

I understand there has been some discussion of a medal.

This is appropriate.

I would also accept steak.

AMOS Head of Goat Security Cree

08/22/2026

The Ma'am, the myth, the legend

A little appreciation post for our founder in her element
Slinging soap and changing people's lives through her dedication to a wholesome and natural skin care products for over ten years.

Simple ingredients, sustainably packaged, made with love from us to you.

Thanks to everyone who has ever made a purchase to help support our dream.

08/20/2026

It's a beautiful day to make soap!

Making another batch of our wintery Forest Mint, it'll be ready just in time for Fall in the beginning of October, it can't come quickly enough 🍂🍁

08/03/2026

Something exciting has been brewing!!

We are SO thrilled to announce our new website!! Same great products, updated information and design!!

Learn more about us, what we do, how we do it and find our products with ease. We couldn't be more excited.

Visit it today and let us know what you think!! Bonus points for leaving a review of your favorite product!

https://coloradowildbotanicals.com/

All natural botanical infused Goat Milk Soap made in Colorado Rocky Mountains.

08/02/2026

Don't forget at Ridgeway market this week is a Thursday!!

We'll see you Friday in telluride,
Saturday in Montrose and
Sunday in palisade for our regular schedules!!

07/23/2026

New soap alert!!

A couple of weeks ago we made a brand new soap, and she is ready for you this weekend!

Meet our Mallow, Chamomile and Citrus!

Come out and snag a new bar
Telluride Farmers' Market Friday 10:30-3:30
Ridgway Farmers Market Friday 10-2
Montrose Farmers Market Saturday 9-1
Palisade Sunday Farmers Market Sunday 9-1!

Infused with wild harvested mallow, chamomile, finished with a citrus blend of grapefruit, litsea and bergamot essential oils.

This blend is bright, citrusy, and smells like sunshine.

The infused mallow and chamomile are softening, hydrating, and very soothing to your skin. Good for skin redness, irritations, inflammation, and sunburned skin to gently cleanse while giving back nourishment.

06/27/2026

We're slowly adding our hand thrown soap dishes to our local shows- and hopefully online (soon!)

Come find us in Palisade today 9-4!

06/26/2026

Can't wait for tomorrow!

06/15/2026

Did you know we have an unscented tallow soap? Meet our Plain Jane bar.

This nourishing soap is tallow based, with our traditional goats milk recipe.

With just six ingredients it is a great option for those with smell sensitivity, sensitive skin or just looking for a simple but nourishing alternative to other products.

Gentle enough to use on your face and powerful enough for a full body cleanse!