Vitality Coaching by Laura

What opens up when we shift away from "thinking" about coaching and move towards "sensing" it through our bodies?

At The Coaches Summit, I’ll be leading an interactive playshop on bringing the ICF Core Competencies into the body through movement and somatic awareness. Together, we’ll explore how these practices can deepen our presence, sharpen our listening, and strengthen the coaching partnership.

If you’re attending, I’d love to see you there!

📅 September 18
🔗 Join the Coaching Playground: https://lnkd.in/gS3UgqEm

The secret to staying consistent with movement may have less to do with willpower and more to do with joy.

After more than a decade of teaching Nia, I’ve learned that consistency rarely comes from discipline alone.
It comes from finding a practice that gives you something you want to return to.

For my students, that “something” looks different every week.

Sometimes, it’s music that helps them forget they’re exercising.
Sometimes, it’s the freedom to move without worrying about getting every step right.
and sometimes, it’s simply having one hour each week to reconnect with yourself- body, mind, and spirit.

Over time, the class becomes more than movement. It becomes what several students have called “an anchor in my week.”

That description has stayed with me.

Because we often assume people need more motivation to remain active.
But perhaps they need movement that feels less like another demand on their body and more like a way of listening to it.

Movement can support strength, balance, and healthy aging while still leaving room for play, expression, and joy.

That is what brings people back.
Not pressure. Not perfection. Not even the workout itself.

The feeling they carry with them when they leave.

If you’re in Oakland and would like to experience a Nia session, send me a DM.

In my 26th year of coaching, one distinction feels more important than ever: knowing when I’m coaching and when I’m mentoring.

I feel honored to mentor newer, emerging coaches.
Sometimes, that looks and feels like regular coaching, where they are discovering their own answers.
At other times, I put on my “mentor hat” and share the wisdom, tools, and practices I’ve gathered along my coaching journey.

I always name when I’m switching gears by saying, “I’m going to put on my mentor hat,” so the client knows which type of support they are receiving.
Especially for a new coach, it is important to make this distinction.

Coaching helps clients access their own wisdom. Mentoring gives them access to some of mine.
When we clearly name which role we are stepping into, the client understands what kind of support they are receiving and both practices remain clear.

For coaches who also mentor, how do you signal that shift in your sessions?

We did it. We moved Gabriel into Cal Poly.

Our younger son is officially off to college, and I’m immersed in the swirl of so many emotions.
Proud, grateful, excited for him…and also a little disoriented.

For years, so much of life has been built around raising our boys.
The routines, the conversations, the driving, the everyday moments you don’t think twice about until suddenly they start to change.
I knew this day was coming. I just don’t think you ever fully know what it will feel like until you’re standing there saying goodbye.

Watching Gabriel walk toward this next chapter of his life was a good reminder that transitions can hold a lot at once.
You can be incredibly happy for someone and still feel the loss of what is changing.

For now, I’m mostly feeling thankful.
Thankful for the young men we’ve had the privilege of raising, for my husband who has been beside me through all of it,
and for this next chapter, whatever it looks like.

Gabriel is stepping into something new.
And...I am too.

More than 20 years of coaching has taught me this: Your coaching presence has a limit.

I discovered mine after finishing my fifth session of the day, with one more still on the calendar.
I sat there staring at my screen, trying to summon presence I did not have.

That was the day I stopped guessing and started building an actual system for how I coach.

Here is the cheat sheet I use now-

1. Build a transition ritual between clients.
Mine is “shake it off.” Five seconds of literally shaking out whatever the last session brought.
Three deep breaths work too. Whatever helps you reset. Arrive fresh. Don’t let the previous session follow you into the next one.

2. Know your sustainable session count.
For me, five is the sweet spot. At six or seven, my presence measurably drops, and my clients deserve better than that.
Find your limit, then build your schedule around it.

3. Move between sessions.
Even when I have back-to-back sessions, I make it a point to stand, stretch, or step outside for five minutes.
A little movement, sunlight, and fresh air can help you reset before the next session.

4. Take care of the person behind the coach.
Sleep, movement, meditation, hydration, nourishing food, all shape how you show up for your clients.
Bringing life goals and wellness together creates vitality, and that starts with the coach.

5. Experiment with your rhythm.
I coach back-to-back because it keeps me in flow. Some coaches need buffers.
What matters is knowing which one is yours and building your day around it.

If you try one this week, make it the transition ritual. Everything else builds from arriving fresh.

What helps you reset between sessions?

Coaches, If you’re giving advice, you’re not coaching.

It’s a line I hold carefully, because it’s also one of the easiest lines to blur.

Advice sounds like- "I think you should do this.”
And no matter how experienced we are, or how obvious the answer may feel to us, that is not the role of a coach.

But there is a harder question- What do you do when a client is genuinely stuck?
When they keep asking what you think.
When you can see a perspective, framework or resource that may help them move forward.

This is the distinction I teach coaches pursuing ICF certification: you can offer resources. You cannot give advice.
The difference is attachment.

When a client repeatedly asks me a question, I don't dodge it forever.
At some point I say: "it sounds like you're asking me a question you want me to answer. Is that right?"

If they say yes, I answer.
But I frame it precisely.
This is based on my experience, not yours. I am offering it as one option for you to explore in your own life.

I think of it as adding something to a buffet table.
I can put an option on the table.
The client decides whether to pick it up.
And this is the part that matters most: I have to be completely okay if they don’t.

Because the moment I become invested in them following my suggestion, I am no longer simply offering a resource.
I am prescribing an outcome.

Resource sharing should also remain a very small part of the conversation.

In a 60-minute session, I might spend three to five minutes sharing a framework, perspective or resource.
And that may happen in only one or two out of every five sessions.

The rest is coaching.

Listening. Questioning. Reflecting.
Giving the client enough space to discover what is true for them.
Client autonomy is the real deal. Protect it.

Coaches, when a client genuinely asks for your perspective, where do you draw the line between offering a resource and giving advice?

Not taking your PTO is a pay cut you're giving yourself.

Do the math.
On a $100,000 salary with 20 vacation days, each day you skip is roughly $385 you already earned and quietly handed back.
Take only 10 of your 20 days and you just gave your employer a $3,800 discount they never asked for.

Every extra hour you regularly work beyond your contracted day lowers your effective hourly rate.
Yet capable professionals do this all the time.

Not because the work truly demands it. Because taking the time feels selfish, disruptive, or inconvenient for the team.
But PTO isn’t a favor from your employer.
You already earned it.

So treat it like part of your compensation:

1. Book it early.
Put the dates on your calendar months ahead so both you and your team can plan around them.

2. Actually unplug.
A vacation with Slack open is just work from a nicer location.

3. Stop waiting for permission.
Your manager probably isn’t going to remind you to take every day you’ve earned. You have to protect that time yourself.

You wouldn’t voluntarily return part of your paycheck.
Why return your time?
Claim what you’ve earned. All of it.

How many days are still sitting unused on your calendar right now?

Most people wait until December to ask whether the year went the way they hoped.

I don’t think we need to wait that long.

For years, I’ve taken my clients through a Year in Review at the end of December and a Year in Preview in January.

The Review helps us look back with clarity.
The Preview helps us move forward with intention.

This year, I added something in between: a Mid-Year Review

It’s a chance to pause midway through the year, notice where you are, and make changes while there’s still time.

What is on track?
What has gone off track?
What needs more attention or energy?
What are you ready to let go of?

Because sometimes the goal is still right, but the approach needs to change.

Sometimes the goal itself no longer makes sense.

And sometimes you realise you are doing much better than you have given yourself credit for.

For me, this is what reflection is really about.

Not judging the last six months, but creating enough awareness to make more intentional choices for the next six.

A mid-year check-in helps you make changes before the year is over.

If you haven’t done one yet, this might be a good time to begin.

Kids used to leave for college, find a job and build a life of their own.
For many families, that path looks very different today.

Housing is more expensive. Careers take longer to settle into. Family structures have changed.

More adult children are moving back home, sometimes for a few months, sometimes for much longer.
But moving back home should not mean moving back into the old parent-child dynamic.

The real shift is learning how to live together as adults.
That requires clearer expectations, better boundaries and a different kind of conversation.

Three things can help:

1. Trade advice for questions.
When your adult child brings you a problem, resist the instinct to solve it for them.
Instead, ask them how they’re thinking about the situation and what they want to do next.
The goal is not to have all the answers for them. It is to help them strengthen their ability to make their own decisions.

2. Be clear about money.
Talk openly about what you are willing to support and what they need to take responsibility for.
No hints. No assumptions. If that support is going to change over time, talk about those changes clearly too.

3. Make contribution part of the arrangement.
If they are living at home, they should contribute in a meaningful way.
That might be rent. It might be groceries, cooking, cleaning, or taking responsibility for certain household tasks.
Coming home should not mean stepping back into childhood.

And finally, agree on what progress looks like.
Maybe it is finding full-time work. Maybe it is saving a certain amount, building a career, completing a course or preparing to move out.
Whatever it is, put some clarity and a timeline around it.

The empty nest many parents expected has become a longer and sometimes messier transition into independence.
Perhaps the goal is not to push adult children out as quickly as possible.
It is to make sure that while they are home, everyone keeps moving forward.

Have you had an adult child move back home? If yes, what helped you navigate that transition?

The coaches I mentor who quit in year one usually quit for the same reason.

They post for six months, hear very little back, and decide coaching is not viable.
They pulled the plug before the math ever had a chance to work.

Here is what the coaches who make it past year two do differently.

1. Set income goals by year, not by month.

Set ambitious but realistic goals. If you expect to make a million in year one, month three can quickly feel like failure.
Year one will likely earn less than year two. Plan for that runway from the start.

2. Get exceptionally good at the craft.

When clients get results, they talk about it. Referrals remain one of the strongest sources of new business in my practice.
Marketing matters. But nothing compounds if the coaching itself is not strong.

3. Do the hustle social media cannot do for you.

Tell your network you are coaching. Email former colleagues. Reach out to people who already know and trust you.
Most new coaches underestimate how much business begins with a direct conversation.

4. Learn how to enroll clients.

Even after a great sample session, you have to talk about your pricing and how you will work together.
The first conversation may feel awkward. It gets easier with practice. This is the skill nobody teaches in certification.

5. Give yourself a one to two-year runway, minimum.

Six months is rarely enough data to decide whether a coaching practice can work.
Give yourself one to two years to build trust, skill, referrals, and confidence.

The coaches who build extraordinary practices are not necessarily more talented than the ones who quit.
They stayed long enough for the work to compound.

If you are in your first two years and questioning whether to continue, send me a message. I’m happy to share a few things that may help.