11/17/2021
It was Bentleyās birthday a few days ago. And in about three weeks it will be Jakobās birthday.
Itās been about a week since the midwives mentioned induction to us and today maternal fetal medicine strongly advised we do an induction at 37 weeks. Thatās December 10th.
At first I hated the idea, I cried for an entire evening and then some. I wasnāt ready for Jakob to leave me, for the little kicks to stop, for this quiet private bond weāve built to end, for him to leave the safety heās in now and to be exposed to this crazy world we live in. I still feel that way, and am still not sure if itās even rational considering how difficult pregnancy has been on my body.
But, he is healthy right now and the medical team has assured us that he looks ready to join us at 37 weeks and do not expect any issues for him. If we wait, that could change⦠for him and especially for me.
The concern right now is for me and my health, short and long term. So reluctantly Iām agreeing. I donāt want to be induced. But Jakob deserves a healthy momma.
Iām excited to see his face, squeeze his cheeks, watch him stretch out, and hear all the fun noises heāll make. But Iām anxious, and Iām in my feels. All the emotions on top of the rush to get all the things together, organized, and ready - itās a lot.
People donāt talk about this part of pregnancy. We see the happy bump photos and smiles and nurseries and everything looks like an easy dream. When in realty, itās not always like that.
There are definitely days like that, donāt get me wrong. There are happy moments and laughs and so much joy about our little miracle. But itās not constant or consistent.
Letās normalize what the pregnancy journey is actually like. Letās be real and honest and open. When weāre vulnerable, it allows others to feel validated in their journeys, to be vulnerable, and to ask for support if they need it. I have wonderful support from my husband, my family, close friends, and staff. Iām so thankful for that. š¤
So happy birthday Bentley, you old pup. We got you a baby brother this year, heāll be here to pull on your hair sooner than you know it š