Expand Your Game

Before playoffs or big games, coaches sometimes tell their players to just “leave the nerves at home” or “don’t let the pressure get to you,” thinking that these messages will help their players lock-in and play their best.

Have you heard something like this before? Ya? Did it help you?

While these statements DO have good intentions behind them, and they are generally the right idea (we would love to leave our nerves at home!), the problem is that players often have NO IDEA HOW to do that.

The lack of tangible tools, reflection activities, and honest conversations around the topics of pressure and expectations, leaves players feeling a complete lack of control and not knowing how to navigate the nerves, which easily derails their game. When players are at a 10/10 on the pressure scale, performance is impacted because the stress messes with their decision making.

What is often happening when player’s experience a wave of performance anxiety right before an event, is that they have put off dealing with the feelings. They’ve ignored them all week and then it slams into them at the last second.

The long term solution is to prioritize getting yourself tools and strategies. You need to create some solid routines and habits that put you in the driver’s seat so that when these things start to poke up, you know exactly how to coach yourself through and keep the nerves at a manageable level. That type of work does not happen overnight and requires a time investment and a strong desire to expand in this area.

If this is happening to you or your athlete and you need help learning these ‘HOWS’, message me MMA and I’ll end over info about how we help youth athletes overcome this hurdle.

☮️🧡⚽️
Coach Jenn

We’ve all heard it before. Right before playoffs or a big game, people telling us:

“Leave the nerves at home.”
“Don’t let the pressure get to you.”
“Just go play your game.”

On the surface, these are positive, encouraging statements. They’re meant to help players lock in, relax, and perform their best. But if you’ve ever been on the receiving end of one of these pep talks, you know the problem: no one ever explains how to do these things.

Coaches, team captains, even parents - instead of dismissing nerves, what if we normalized them and taught our teams how to work through them? The best first step you can take here is to switch up your language….

Instead of telling players “don’t let the pressure get to you” say something along the lines of “Ok, I understand that the pressure is real. You feel it, I feel it, we ALL feel it, AND we can handle it.” Emphasize and show everyone that it is a shared experience and that you’re all in it together.

Simple acknowledgement goes a long way towards reducing the heavy load players are feeling.

After that acknowledgement, talk about your preparedness, and why you trust them. “We’ve been preparing for a long time, here is why we are ready….(fill in the blank)”.

Lastly, finish with some “we’ve got each other’s backs” activities and have everyone share observations and contributions they have been seeing other people make in training all week, things they appreciate and know will help the team in the game. Intentional confidence building like this goes a LONG way in regard to helping a group overcome their nerves and reduce the pressure.

Here’s the truth: pressure isn’t going away. Nerves aren’t going away either. An athlete’s job isn’t to just tell themselves to deal with it—it’s to get plans in place SO THAT THEY CAN ACTUALLY DO THAT.

And coaches/captains/parents you can help more than you know, just by acknowledging the struggle and having the conversation.

☮️🧡⚽️
Coach Jenn

Favorite MMA tool - Controllable Objectives

Controllable objectives ARE HIGH EXPECTATIONS (meaning we have full control over them), not impossibly-high-unrealistic ones (ones where we only have partial or zero control).

Favorite MMA tool - I AM statements

We want to make sure that our words (both our INNER & OUTER dialogue) align with the identity that we want to have. Whatever we are striving to be, we want our words to line up with THAT.

Favorite MMA tool - Redefining Success

Each and every day, you CAN find success as it relates to you moving forward toward becoming the player, and person, you want to be. This is something nobody can stop you from doing.

————

⚽ Almost all focus is on the “traditional” physical skills.

🏃🏾‍♀️Running, passing, shooting, dribbling, juggling, repeat.

And most players think that being the most skilled player will get them to the top…

But having a great shot doesn’t matter if you crumble under pressure 😩

🛟 Having great vision for picking a pass doesn’t matter if fear of failure makes you always play the safe option.

🗯️ Being the fastest player doesn’t matter if you hesitate because of overthinking.

👟 Being a great dribbler doesn’t matter without confidence to take players on in games.

When a player masters their mental game, all other skills are amplified 🔥🔥🔥🔥

Yet, people don’t really understand that mentality can be TRAINED.

Well, 100% of players that complete our program report an increase in confidence, resiliency and mental toughness ❤️⚽️✅

Stop hoping this fall season will just magically be different for your daughter, and TAKE SOME ACTION to help her make that happen. 

If your player is between the ages of 9-17, comment MMA to apply for our Mindset Mastery Academy program and break the cycle.

☮️🧡⚽️
Coach Jenn

When players move into a more challenging environment they can sometimes find themselves losing their confidence and scared of making mistakes. They start playing ‘small’.

This happens because they are in a new situation where they are no longer at the top and are now surrounded by more talent and skill, which is uncomfortable. Because they are now around more elite level players, they tend to feel as if they are not as good as they used to be (it’s very easy to get fixated on what you think you LACK when you are surrounded by a lot of talent). The truth is though, they are the same player!

In fact she’s probably ALREADY better, but she just can’t see it because she’s comparing herself to an entirely new group of players. Her SKILL hasn’t changed, just how she views herself in relation to the people around her.

Here’s the good news though, this moment doesn’t have to derail her game and can actually be a huge jumping off point for grit, mental toughness and resiliency, not to mention actual soccer skill.

The reframe here is that we don’t actually have to look at what we can’t do yet as things we lack, we can instead choose to look at them as our NEXT STEPS. Meaning, the next things I need to add to my game. Because really, these new players on this higher level team aren’t here to show us what we lack, they are here to challenge us to RISE UP, put our foot on the gas pedal, and ADD to our game. (P.S. Every athlete, even pros, have next steps! If they didn’t think they did, they would quickly be in trouble or even lose their job…)

This new environment WILL result in her having some mistakes and gaps in her game, totally normal. But, instead of getting upset when we find something we can’t do, we can actually take the mindset of getting EXCITED because now we know EXACTLY what to work on!

Every time we identify a new gap, we move closer to being the player we want to be. When we choose this mentality, we all of a sudden start accelerating our game at a wild rate. This fast growth is something you could NEVER GET in the less-challenging environment where you were the top player.

☮️🧡⚽️
Coach Jenn

Soccer players - ever set a goal, and not reach it?

Even though you did EVERYTHING you could?
Does this mean it was a waste of time?
What was the purpose of it?

Here’s my take -

Big goals are GREAT to have because they are a guiding light.
They drive us forward and give us something to strive toward…

We need goals because they give us direction and motivate us - but we can’t be afraid to adapt and shift them as needed
(especially right now as the world of women’s soccer is blowing up, the landscape changing quickly, and new avenues of opportunity are constantly being added!)

If we are too rigid with our goals, we will prevent ourselves from truly experiencing our own authenticity and greatness and finding our own path. Which is CRUCIAL to both success and happiness.

Your journey is YOUR journey, it’s not supposed to look like someone else’s. Meaning you don’t need to do things the same way as someone else.

Right now, your goals probably reflect someone else’s path because that is your reference point. This is totally OK! But staying growth-minded about the idea that it may not look EXACTLY like you planned, will help you get ahead of inevitable challenges and help you propel herself forward when things get hard.

So, set big aspirational goals and work toward them, yes! But knowing that having a goal is not always about reaching that exact goal, it’s about all the skills and grit you gain by STRIVING toward that goal. I guarantee you, if you do this over and over and over, you will collect a lot of skills and grit, and YOU WILL FIND SUCCESS.

🏆🙌🧠🌱❤️⚽️🔥🤩

☮️🧡⚽️
Coach Jenn

From .weeks

My first semi-pro summer was with the Chicago Red Stars…

I was so excited to play in this competitive environment. I was also scared. 

In college I was a box to box midfielder, but in this team I thought center back would be safer so I told the coach that was where I played. 

Before arriving, I looked up my new teammates and was so impressed by the quality. National team players, girls who had been to the NCAA College Cup, even my conference rivals. Our first practice I played 9. It was fun, I didn’t really know what to do but I was just happy to be on the team.

Then things changed. Once training started I began to lose my confidence and self-belief. My technical ability was behind my teammates and most drills I couldn’t keep up. I felt like the weakest link pulling the ship down. It got to a point that I wanted to give up playing. 

BUT, despite all that, I kept showing up. I put in the work. I stayed consistent. I leaned on my teammates who inspired me each day. They lifted me and taught me so much. 

At the end of season I started speaking up in games and was encouraged and supported by my teammates who never heard me really speak up. It was motivating. 

We ended up winning our league and I cherish those memories always. The ups and downs made me who I am today and I wouldn’t change it for a minute.

These moments are hard, but necessary. They can be rough, but glorious. In the end, the only way to expand is to put yourself into these spaces and go for it. 

Rely on your community for support, but most importantly know that you have your own back and can get yourself through this. And know that what is waiting on the other side is a stronger, more resilient, more gritty version of you. 

Autumn Weeks, pro player and mental skills coach at Expand Your Game

The Mindset Mastery Academy is a 12-week 1-on-1 and small group mental skills mentorship experience for youth female soccer players ☮️ 🧡 ⚽️

I started this program because I was seeing so many of my own players struggling 😩 to navigate some of the harder pieces of the competitive & elite youth soccer world that they were a part of.

The pressure and expectations that they were putting on themselves to produce certain results on the soccer field was taking a huge toll on not just their confidence and their performance, but on their sense of self-worth and their love 💔 for the game.

Mental skills work is a combination of enhancing performance 🏋🏻‍♀️ AND working on wellbeing 🌼. Working directly with a mental skills coach is the BEST way for players to accelerate 📈 their learning and growth in regards to making the biggest impact on their confidence and game play in the shortest amount of time.

Focused mental skills work really has the power 🔥 to help soccer players see their worth beyond the bounds of their performance. It is what leads to players lessoning their dependance on external validation and working towards becoming their own best inner coach 👑 by building true, stable, deep confidence and belief in themselves and their abilities. When players are given the space to learn about themselves 🧘🏽‍♀️ and focus on identity and character development alongside their soccer game, they come to see that who they are as a person is ultimately what will drive their success 🏆 in the long run.

DM me with the word MMA (or comment MMA below), I’ll send you the process I have used to help dozens & dozens of competitive and elite youth female soccer players build TRUE, deep, unshakeable CONFIDENCE and belief in themselves and their abilities.

☮️🧡⚽️
Coach Jenn

Soccer players - ever set a goal, and not reach it?

Even though you did EVERYTHING you could?
Does this mean it was a waste of time?
What was the purpose of it?

Here’s my take -

Big goals are GREAT to have because they are a guiding light.
They drive us forward and give us something to strive toward…

We need goals because they give us direction and motivate us - but we can’t be afraid to adapt and shift them as needed
(especially right now as the world of women’s soccer is blowing up, the landscape changing quickly, and new avenues of opportunity are constantly being added!)

If we are too rigid with our goals, we will prevent ourselves from truly experiencing our own authenticity and greatness and finding our own path. Which is CRUCIAL to both success and happiness.

Your journey is YOUR journey, it’s not supposed to look like someone else’s. Meaning you don’t need to do things the same way as someone else.

Right now, your goals probably reflect someone else’s path because that is your reference point. This is totally OK! But staying growth-minded about the idea that it may not look EXACTLY like you planned, will help you get ahead of inevitable challenges and help you propel herself forward when things get hard.

So, set big aspirational goals and work toward them, yes! But knowing that having a goal is not always about reaching that exact goal, it’s about all the skills and grit you gain by STRIVING toward that goal. I guarantee you, if you do this over and over and over, you will collect a lot of skills and grit, and YOU WILL FIND SUCCESS.

🏆🙌🧠🌱❤️⚽️🔥🤩

☮️🧡⚽️
Coach Jenn

Only when we can CATCH our attention being pulled elsewhere, are we able to refocus, center, and bring ourselves back to the present. And actually appreciate the moment.

EVERYTHING is trying to distract you, trying to get you to focus on problems. When you decide to opt-out of this, focus on solutions, TALK to yourself instead of LISTEN, you become unstoppable.

And soccer becomes fun again.

☮️🧡⚽️
Coach Jenn

Keepers, don’t be letting that attacker come into your space and do what they want…

This is YOUR HOME.

YOU are getting to that ball first

YOU are cutting down every angle

YOU are crashing through the chaos

and YOU are the ONLY ONE that can use their hands. Legally.

Owning the box is a mindset 🔥

Here’s the secret to make this work - you can’t just cross your fingers and hope you do this, you have to CHOOSE THIS MENTALITY before you even hit the pitch.

☮️🧡⚽️
Coach Jenn

🎉 GIVEAWAY ALERT! 🎉

We’re giving away 2 FREE tickets to the Bay FC ⚽ vs Washington Spirit game at Oracle Park in San Francisco, 1 PM, Saturday August 23rd!

Parents and players, here’s how to enter -

1️⃣ Follow our page
2️⃣ Comment about a time when mentality made the difference in a match
3️⃣ Tag a friend you’d take to the game

🔥 BONUS: Everyone who enters receives 2 FREE months of access to our brand new parent community, The ASSIST! (If you are NOT in the Bay Area and can’t go to the game, enter anyway to receive the community access!)

This giveaway is in celebration of the kickoff of our fall Mindset Mastery Academy session, and prioritizing mental wellness for this fall soccer season ☮️🧡⚽️

ENTER BY THURSDAY MIDNIGHT PT. Winner will be announced Friday and will have 2 hours to accept 🏟️✨(make sure you are checking your IG messages!)

Don’t miss your chance to see some of the best in women’s soccer compete live!!

Stop expecting the keeper to make the save, instead…

expect them TO MISS

expect them TO MAKE THE FIRST SAVE, BUT NOT THE SECOND

expect the BALL TO HIT THE POST

expect it TO BOUNCE AROUND IN THE SIX-YARD BOX

Anticipating rebounds is a mindset 🔥

Here’s the secret to make this work - you can’t just cross your fingers and hope you do this, you have to CHOOSE THIS MENTALITY before you even hit the pitch.

☮️🧡⚽️
Coach Jenn