Melissa Parks, PhD - Coach for Globally Mobile & Writer

Something is shifting. Although I’m not sure what yet.

I was driving to lunch today with my oldest friends (the ones I met between ages 5 and 12, who I’ve somehow managed to stay close to through all the moves and life changes) when it hit me out of nowhere: I might be ready to move abroad again soon. 😳

It arrived the same way a voice once spoke to me in Madrid’s Retiro Park on my very first trip abroad: “I want to live here one day.”

Writing a memoir means spending years living looking backwards — looking back at old journal entries, old versions of yourself, reliving past grief and therapy sessions. And somewhere in that process, I think I’ve also been writing my way toward to something I didn’t expect —the possibility of a new chapter abroad.

Only time will tell what this means. But standing at the edge of my book launch — 17 days away — I’m realizing I’m not just someone who wrote a book. I’m someone who writes. Who needs to write. I’m a writer. An identity I’ve never felt like I’ve deserved. It’s truly the ultimate imposter syndrome.

AND it feels like it’s own version of

What does forward look like for you right now?



A huge thank you to for organizing this annual challenge and opportunity to reconnect with community on here through something I enjoy so much 💗

"You're too sensitive."

If you've never been told this, you probably wouldn't understand how damaging it can be. But if, like me, you've had this hurled at you throughout your life, you probably wince when you hear those words.

When you're told your whole life that you feel things too deeply, it causes you to stop trusting yourself. As I describe it in my memoir:

"Early on, I stopped trusting my inner emotional compass and looked outside of myself to find out how I was supposed to feel. If my feelings couldn't be trusted, how could I be trusted?"

Through the pages of my book I describe slowly learning to turn back inward and reconnect with myself. One of the pieces that helped along that journey was discovering the concept of the Highly Sensitive Person, or HSP. It was one of the first times I saw sensitivity painted in a positive light. Feeling things deeply wasn't a flaw, it was simply part of my wiring, and could even be harnessed as a strength.

This reframe was a milestone on the self-compassion journey I describe in my memoir, and I've seen how powerful and healing it's been for so many of my clients too.

"A Compassionate Mess" will be available worldwide June 23rd. 🌎💖📗

I was trained to be a blank slate.

No photos in my office. No clothes that would hint at my personality. No mention of having experienced anything semi-related to what my clients were going through.

I never felt completely comfortable with this blanket advice. As I write in my memoir: “Sometimes I feel like I was trained to be an empathy robot instead of a compassionate fellow human being.”

My approach to self-disclosure has evolved immensely since I finished my master’s degree thirteen years ago.

Some of my first expat clients found me through my blog, where I spoke openly about how I’d gotten through the emotional ups and downs of living abroad. “Tell me how to do the same,” they’d say. Grad school certainly hadn’t prepared me for that!

I never made sessions about me. I was cautious about what I shared. But it was obvious that the blank slate was not what my clients needed.

When I moved to the US and switched to coaching, I became even more transparent. Self-disclosure is more accepted in the coaching world, and my clients often wanted support specifically with the transitions I’d lived through.

As I dove deeper into self-compassion, I discovered the healing power of common humanity, which often includes knowing that the person in front of you has been through something similar.

The memoir is a whole new layer of sharing. I assumed no one would want to work with me after reading it. Yet early readers are suggesting just the opposite.

I still remain firm about not sharing when I’m presently in crisis (that’s for my own therapist). But sometimes they know I’ve been sick, or my kids have been sick, or something my younger professional self would have shaken her head about. We’re human. And the further I get in my career, the more I see that showing our imperfections, and being okay with them, is an essential foundation for healing.

“A Compassionate Mess: A Therapist, Her Monsters, and a Journey to Self-Acceptance” will be published June 23rd.

This post was inspired by the prompt from the challenge organized by

Three weeks from today, "A Compassionate Mess" will be out in the world. 🎉

To celebrate, I'm hosting an online launch party on June 23rd and I'd love for you to join me.

We'll do a reading from the book, a short guided self-compassion meditation, Q&A, and a giveaway of some of my favorite books.

📅 June 23rd · 10am PT / 1pm ET / 7pm CET

🔗 Sign up at the link in my bio

Everyone is welcome — no need to have read the book or be planning to. Just come celebrate with me.

Hope to see you there!

It’s impossible for me to hear the word “community” and not immediately think about the (LIT) Community.

What started off back in 2019, as I was preparing to repatriate, as a dream of bringing together mental health professionals from around the globe, has now been around for six years and welcomed 300+ therapists from around the world.

Every time I attend one of our events and connect with other globally minded colleagues I’m reminded of what a unique space we’ve created. Supportive, encouraging, open minded, and informative. I always say that if I wasn’t a co-founder I’d be a paying member. I really can’t imagine being a solopreneur doing this work of seeing clients around the globe without the support of other mental health professionals who get it.

I want this to be a post of gratitude. Like I say in the acknowledgements section of my memoir - “to all of the LIT Community therapists around the globe, thank you for helping me find my confidence, identity, and online ‘home’ as a therapist-turned-coach.”

Community is beyond valuable when you’re globally mobile and I’m so grateful that I have such a rich professional one ♥️

Thank you for another wonderful prompt 🌍 ✍️

If you're living abroad and your inner critic is louder than ever, you're not alone. 🌎

Moving to a new country often turns up the volume on that voice. It may say you're not cut out for life abroad, that it's easier for everyone else, and that you should just snap out of it and be grateful for the amazing opportunity you have. 🗣️

It might also remind you of things you've struggled with for quite a while: you're too sensitive, you get stressed out too easily, or you're so awkward in social situations. 😨

I spent years working with globally mobile clients (and living abroad myself) before I realized how much suffering isn't caused by the challenges themselves, but by the way we speak to ourselves about those challenges. 💬

That's why I created From Self-Criticism to Self-Compassion — a free five-day guided meditation series designed specifically for people living abroad. 💌

Each day includes a short guided meditation and a little info about why self-compassion can be such a powerful practice when you're living a life that spans borders.

Sign up here - https://melissaparks.com/self-compassion-series/

When I saw the prompt of “return” for I found myself thinking of all the globally mobile people for whom a return isn’t straightforward, or even possible. 🌎

Of those with multiple passports who don’t have a particular country that comes to mind when they think of the word “return.”

Of TCKs with no residency or citizenship to return to live in the country they grew up in.

Of those whose family and friends have left the place that they once considered home. What is home when your people are gone?

Of those who have escaped violence and persecution and will never be able to return to the place that was once home.

Of my husband and his family and friends who left their home country, and others in similar situations — what if you technically can return, but the place is no longer recognizable?

Of the intercultural couples and families for whom “return” may bring a different place to mind for each person.

I assumed my own story wouldn’t be on this list. After all, I grew up in my home country, moved to Spain, then the Netherlands, then came back — to my home country, my hometown even.

But when I wrote this post I remembered mine isn’t simple either. My story is the final item on this list. The guilt, the fear, the pressure of being the one who initiated an international move and what that would mean if things didn’t work out. I was the one who wanted to return - to a country my husband never planned to live in. I write more about all of this in my memoir.

Maybe return is never straightforward once you’ve made a home in more than one place. And even though our globally mobile stories are unique, having our heart split across borders may be the thing that connects all of us ♥️ 🌏

"I definitely feel like I found home by going abroad. I think for a lot of people who end up going abroad, they never felt at home where they were."

"That's kind of the spoiler of what my book is about, turning inwards to find home."

That's a small excerpt from my recent conversation with Daniel Welsch on the Spain to Go podcast. 🎙 We talked about the psychology of expat life including identity shifts, why your problems follow you in your suitcase, and why working with a therapist or coach who has truly lived the expat experience can make all the difference.

We also talked about my memoir "A Compassionate Mess," coming June 23rd.

🎧 Listen here - https://open.spotify.com/episode/1f9aGL0WAoaa1LtedNU6i2

Yesterday I added some of the endorsements I’ve received for my book to my website. It felt very surreal to write “Praise for 'A Compassionate Mess'” when I’ve read that line so many times in reference to other authors' work.

This book is my story, but as more people read it I can already tell it’s taking on a life of its own and creating more stories around the globe. It’s a very cool feeling and actually makes it much easier to share about the book.

“A Compassionate Mess: A Therapist, Her Monsters, and a Journey to Self-Acceptance” will officially be out in the world on June 23rd 📖

If you want to learn more, or sign up for updates, visit my website 😀

A Compassionate Mess | A Memoir by Melissa Parks (June 23, 2026) A memoir about moving abroad, heartbreak, and the long journey toward self-compassion — and realizing the person you tried to fix might never have been broken.