Executives of Function

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Your Epic Journey: An ADHD-Friendly Guide to Mythical Personal Transformation — Perfect Space Coaching A goal-setting journal combining the power of mythology and storytelling with coaching to inspire ADHD and neurotypical brains

Feel like you’re drowning? We can help! Adult ADHD group coaching coming soon.

"The Tyranny of the Should" ~German psychoanalyst Karen Horney (1885-1952)

The only word that is off-limits in my coaching practice. Should.

I hear it all the time from clients. "I should be be able to pay my bills on time." "I should be able to do my laundry." "I should have gone to college." Every time this word comes up, I ask the person I'm speaking with to reframe the language.

Should is essentially a contract between your brain and a societal expectation. We are taught that if we behave in a certain way things will go smoothly...until they don't. When things don't go smoothly and our brain has set an expectation based on the standards of others, the resulting feelings of guilt, shame, and embarrassment can lead to a visit from our not so friendly inner-critic.

I challenge you to try out different language next time you find yourself saying "I should..." First always remember to ask yourself "is that true?" and answer why it's not. Then see if phrases like "I could be..." or "I want to..." remove some of the tyranny associated with should.

The biggest part of a coach’s job is to ask clients questions that help them find their own truth(s).

There’s nothing wrong with ADHD, especially once you’ve learned to work with it.

Kaely* has been a client of Lynn's from the beginning. There's been a lot of personal and professional turmoil during our time together. Coaching has allowed her to see "platters of possibilities" rather than a "dinner plate of doom."


*client names used only with express permission.

We can help you learn when and where to apply the knowledge you already have!