Birth.DIY

Born at 39 weeks and 3 days—the only part of the birth that didn't go according to plan!

After a few weeks of incrementally increasing warm-up contractions, I entered into a 12-hour heightened experience that resulted in a perfect everything and a continuing blissful high.

I planned 41-43 weeks as my expected gestational range, based on normal pregnancies and my willingness to stay pregnant/refusal to engage with anyone who would try to artificially shorten it.

I also planned for a Sagittarius baby, a December baby, and a Full Moon baby. Instead, I got a Scorpio baby, a November baby, a New Moon baby.

However, as far as the birth itself goes—I got exactly what I planned for.

During pregnancy, I cast the spells of my intentions. Over and over, I said "I'm setting my expectations for a three-day labor, but I would really love a 12-hour labor." Over and over: "I could be wrong, but I will probably want to be completely alone for most of it." Over and over: "I'm willing to call for support or go to the hospital if needed, but ideally it'll just be my partner and me."

There's a common sentiment among adherents to the medical industrial birth system that birth plans are trash and birth can't be planned. I stand on the other side of the threshold to die on this hill: you can plan for birth.

Maternity shoot by Marísa 🌲🌅🌹

Accurate depiction of the trees' involvement in this gestation! (Not pictured: Grandmother Eucalyptus)

Just thinking about how much fertility struggle, pregnancy discomfort, and postpartum recovery could be eased by nutrition and nourishment. And how no medical prenatal appointments are giving any of this information.

Going from birth-curious to doula to midwifery student has taught me that you, the future mother, are the only one who can truly prevent most birth complications.

Not your birth team, not even your birth environment...

You.

And it starts with mindset, but it's put into practice through your nourishment.

(Nourishment vs. nutrition: nourishment is everything about HOW you feed yourself, including spiritually and emotionally—arguably more important than WHAT you feed yourself, but to be safe I'm gonna say protein and iron and fiber all matter! 😉)

I took everything I've learned about nutrition for childbearing and put into a super-simple weekly/daily checklist, along with some explanations and a blank customizable template for you to adapt.

Link in bio or DM me to download. 📲 .diy

This time last year, I was tying a hematite ring to my hiking pants to counter-propose to my love in Yosemite.

(This time 13 years ago, we were scrambling on a cliff face at sunset trying to make it to water before dark, and I already wanted to marry him.)

This year, we return married and pregnant!

Backpacking together is tbh some of the best evidence I have that we can do hard things as a team.

One of the songs that got me through our 2012 hike is now on my birth playlist ("Absolute Lithops Effect" 😜).

This baby also knows some trees, and now we're going to introduce mountains. 🏔️

More Birth DIY tips, info, & opinions when we return. ✌️

"What if something goes wrong?"

That vague, infinite "something" is the source of fear for most soon-to-be parents.

In our cultural narratives about birth, "something" can happen to endanger mother and baby at any moment.

In reality, there are very few and very rare emergencies that require quick action to save lives.

🤔 The rest of the "somethings"? They're caused by interfering with the birth process, or by lack of awareness of what birth can look like.

In the Birth DIY course, we go over the range of normals in birth, the range of complications in birth, the range of emergencies in birth, and your tolerance for all of it.

You have the opportunity to find your clear boundary of comfort in the full range of birth possibilities, and to truly decide for yourself what you want.

You won't get this in a regular birth class that teaches abstract physiology and coping measures, leaving all the decisions up to "your care team."

💡 Once you know what the real possibilities and probabilities are, finally know what you didn't know, and understand your choices, you're in control.

People say you can't plan for birth, but they're wrong.

You can plan for all your fears.

You can plan for all your dreams.

You can even plan for surrendering to the unknown.

🧚‍♀️ Link in bio or DM .diy for more info.

New blog post on my ~selectively wild~ pregnancy: how to engage with the medical system as a sovereign consumer, ask for what you want and say no to what you don't want, and stay attuned to your inner authority.

💙

Link in bio. .diy

Oh, and "don't eat blue or soft cheese or sushi," but you have access to high-quality cheese and fish that isn't going to give you parasites or listeria just because you happen to be pregnant. 💁‍♀️

⭐️ Free FAQ guide to preconception, pregnancy, birth & postpartum 👉 .diy link in bio, under "WTF Guide."

Sound like the bare minimum? For birthers these days, this is a daydream. I intend to live it.

DMs are open if you want to chat birth dreams!