Rays Reflective Coaching

Last night’s thunder and lightning only woke me slightly, despite the house shaking and the flashes lighting up the whole room.

Yet somehow, on a different night, my own mind can keep me awake all night… even when everything outside is peaceful and quiet.

I think a lot of us know that feeling… lying there exhausted, knowing you 'should' be asleep, but your thoughts just won’t let you switch off.

If we can, sometimes it helps to talk. To write things down. To get creative. To go for a walk, cry, breathe… anything that helps quieten the mind a little before the lights go out and we try to sleep.

Introducing Menopause Matters Together 🌿

We know menopause can sometimes feel lonely, confusing, emotional, or overwhelming and at times difficult to talk about even though so many women are going through it.

Whether you’re feeling isolated, struggling with changes in yourself, looking for connection, or simply curious to meet others navigating a similar stage of life, you are warmly welcome here.

That’s why we’re creating a gentle Walk & Talk space here in Malvern.

A chance to get outside, breathe, connect, and spend time with others who may understand some of what you’re experiencing.

There’s no pressure, no expectations, and no need to share more than you want to. You’re very welcome to come along for the walk, the conversation, or simply the company.

This is a relaxed peer-support community group for women navigating menopause and peri-menopause.

📍 Malvern, UK
📅 Last Wednesday of each month
💛 Free community event
Upcoming dates: 24 June, 29 July, 26th Aug.

Please note: this is a peer-support space rather than therapy or crisis support.

👉 Click on the link to book your place:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSeqhgp4_FUgJLxUwjOcsNc4hf1Pe3BcwPk8AwwUdo_WOgLbpQ/viewform?usp=publish-editor

Maybe you’re not stuck.

Maybe you’ve just never questioned the pattern.

From my own experience, I’ve shared a blog below exploring overthinking, self-beliefs, and how your brain learns what feels “impossible” and how that can begin to shift.

👇See below.
https://www.raysreflectivecoaching.com/where-the-impossible-becomes-possible/

If you’re constantly second-guessing yourself, it’s easy to assume something’s wrong.

But what if it’s not about being unsure…
and more about not trusting your own voice yet?

I’ve written a blog on this, why we seek validation, how it shows up, and what it looks like to start coming back to yourself.
👇 You can read the full post:
https://www.raysreflectivecoaching.com/why-you-crave-validation-and-how-to-trust-yourself/

Why You Crave Validation (And How to Start Trusting Yourself Again) - Ray’s Reflective Coaching Struggling with self-doubt or constantly seeking validation? Learn why you rely on external validation and how to start trusting yourself again.

You don’t actually want validation.
You want to feel safe.

And somewhere along the way, your brain learned:
“Safety comes from other people approving of me.”

So you chase it.
In your work.
In your relationships.
In your bank balance.
In how you look.
In how you’re perceived.

But here’s what that creates:

You second-guess yourself.
You overthink simple decisions.
You say yes when you mean no.
You look confident on the outside…
but inside, nothing ever feels settled.

I see this all the time.

People who have good jobs, strong friendships, full lives,
but can’t make a decision without checking it with someone else first.

I’ve been there too, not able to tell the difference between what I actually felt, and what I thought I should do.
Always looking outside myself for answers I didn’t trust myself to hold.

Not because we’re incapable.
But because we don’t trust our own internal yes.

And this doesn’t stay small.

It impacts everything:

Your health → stress, burnout, anxiety
Your wealth → undercharging, overgiving, playing small
Your relationships → people-pleasing, resentment, losing yourself

At some point, you have to ask:

What would change if I actually trusted myself?

It’s about learning to sit with your own voice again.
To trust your own decisions.
To validate your own experience before you look outside.

That’s the work I do with my clients.

If you’re ready to stop second-guessing yourself and start building that internal trust:

DM me “VALIDATION”
or book a free chemistry call here: https://calendly.com/raysrichards101/new-meeting

I took some time out to read A Thousand Different Ways by Cecelia Ahern, after it was recommended to me, and I’m really glad I did.

The story centres on Alice Kelly, who sees and feels the emotions of the people around her. What almost sounds like a gift also feels overwhelming, because she absorbs not only joy and love, but also sadness, anger, fear, and pain.

Alice learns how to live with this intense sensitivity while navigating family relationships, loneliness, belonging, love, self-acceptance, the coping mechanisms that work until they don’t, and the subtle ways we can take on emotions that aren’t always ours.

At its heart, it is about sensitivity, belonging, and learning what is yours to carry.

As both a coach and a fellow human, what really stayed with me was the reminder that we all move through the world with our own lens, shaped by our experiences, emotions, and personal stories.

We don’t just see things differently, we feel them differently too.

So much understanding can grow when we remember that someone else may be seeing and feeling the very same moment in a completely different way.

A thoughtful, insightful read and a lovely way to spend some intentional time out.