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Follow for honest stories, useful advice and what we’re building. Supporting James’ Place in memory of Cpl Steve Hughes.

This Saturday, at least 15 men from Lads’ Advice will travel to Wales from across the UK to climb Yr Wyddfa (Snowdon) in...
22/09/2026

This Saturday, at least 15 men from Lads’ Advice will travel to Wales from across the UK to climb Yr Wyddfa (Snowdon) in memory of our co-founder, Cpl Steve Hughes, and in aid of our group fundraiser in his memory for James’ Place UK

Steve, a Corporal in The Royal Welsh, died by su***de last August aged 25.

His funeral took place at St Padarn’s Church in the shadow of Yr Wyddfa, and his ashes are interred nearby.

Bringing the lads together there feels particularly significant.

Around 15 men die by su***de in the UK every day. That’s roughly one man on the mountain for every man the UK loses to su***de on an average day.

Joining us on the climb is one of our newest members, Tom, 19.

Ten months ago, then 18, Tom lost his sight in a firework accident. Six months later, his daughter was born.

He is now training for the 2027 TCS London Marathon with his mum, Danni, as his guide runner. This weekend, Yr Wyddfa is the next challenge on his training plan. His younger brother, Olly, will be climbing alongside us.

It will be Tom’s first real mountain, but by no means his first metaphorical one.

In the spirit of our motto, , we’ll start together and finish together, because no man should have to climb his mountain alone.

At the summit, we’ll raise a toast to absent friends.

Every donation helps James’ Place provide free, life-saving support to men in suicidal crisis. Please donate if you can, or share this post and help us to spread the word.

https://www.justgiving.com/page/justbefu***ngkind

You can follow Tom and Danni’s progress towards the London Marathon on their page Tom & Danni: Unfiltered

Thank you.

***dePreventionMonth

Special thanks to Charlie Kerry Pickering for the event stash design 👊

Yesterday we were invited to the National Memorial Arboretum for the dedication and official opening of the Elysium Memo...
14/09/2026

Yesterday we were invited to the National Memorial Arboretum for the dedication and official opening of the Elysium Memorial by the Elysium Memorial Foundation

The monument is the UK’s first memorial solely dedicated to serving members of our Armed Forces and veterans who have died by su***de.

We were there to honour our friends Cpl Steve Hughes, 25 (Steve Hughes), of The Royal Welsh, and LCpl Taylor Cole, 20 (Taylor Cole), of Royal Signals.

We also wanted to stand alongside their families and brothers and sisters in arms, showing our continued love and respect for our mates and for their boys.

And we wanted to support the hugely important work of the foundation, whose determination and hard work turned the idea of a dedicated place to remember those we have lost to su***de into a reality.

Since 1984, more members of the UK Armed Forces have died by su***de than have been killed by enemy action.

This memorial refuses to reduce those men and women to their final moments. Instead, it shines a light on their lives and service, and provides a physical place we can go to remember

It also brings into sharp focus the need to ensure that nobody is left alone with thoughts of su***de, and to equip those likely to encounter service personnel in crisis with the skills and confidence to respond safely.

We laid flowers for Taylor and Steve.

One of our OG members, Jake, who serves with the Mercian Regiment brought along his partner’s 11-year-old son, Oliver, who had asked to join us.

Oliver worked incredibly hard to create individual tributes to Steve and Taylor, each with a memorial message and his own drawings of their regimental TRF and mottos. He laid them beside our flowers and did both lads proud.

We also laid flowers at the Royal Artillery Memorial for our friend and former Royal Artillery soldier Ben Rafton, 24, who died in a collision involving his motorcycle and another vehicle less than three weeks after Steve.

Ben had planned to ride from Plymouth to North Wales for Steve’s funeral. He never got the chance.

Steve, Taylor and Ben remain our boys. We will keep showing up for the families who love and miss them, just as we do.

We’ve . Always. 💙

12/09/2026

Looking forward to seeing all who can make it at the National Arboretum tomorrow

We’ll be there alongside Corporal Steve Hughes’ family and his brothers from The Royal Welsh for the unveiling of a monument by the Elysium Memorial Foundation in memory of all service personnel and veterans who have died by su***de.

Please join us if you can. All Welcome. Please share for awareness.

You can support our fundraiser for James’ Place UK in memory of Steve here:

https://www.justgiving.com/page/justbefu***ngkind

Thank you 💙

This week we took Lads’ Advice to Bournemouth University, where Gav Topley spoke at the   conference. He shared what six...
12/09/2026

This week we took Lads’ Advice to Bournemouth University, where Gav Topley spoke at the conference.

He shared what six and a half years of has taught us about building support that young men will actually engage with and find useful.

While he was down there, Gav caught up with a great friend of the group, Steve, Taylor Cole’s dad.

They got a run in along Bournemouth beach, had a decent catch-up and then undid some of that good work with a curry and a pint.

Before heading home, Gav took flowers to Taylor’s grave from all of us at Lads’ Advice.

White on the left.

Blue on the right.

Arranged to match the Royal Signals Tactical Recognition Flash.

Certa Cito.

Taylor, you are loved and missed every day.

Tomorrow, we’ll be at the National Memorial Arboretum alongside the family of Cpl Steve Hughes and officers and soldiers from The Royal Welsh for the opening of a memorial dedicated to service personnel and veterans who have died by su***de.

Later this month, when lads from the group take on , we’ll lay flowers at Cpl Hughes’s grave in Llanberis and continue our promise to keep showing up.

To all of our boys, remember this:

We’ve . Always. 💙

Today we took Lads’ Advice to the Boys’ Impact Conference 26 at Bournemouth University Gav Topley delivered a session ex...
10/09/2026

Today we took Lads’ Advice to the Boys’ Impact Conference 26 at Bournemouth University

Gav Topley delivered a session exploring what six and a half years of running this community has taught us about how men access support.

Two principles sat at its centre:

Connection before disclosure.

Care before correction.

Many services begin only after somebody has recognised a problem, found the language to explain it and approached the right source of support.

Lads’ Advice begins with ordinary membership.

Men can join for the humour, celebrate a mate, contribute advice on someone else’s post or just sit back and observe how the community responds when life hits a rough patch. They can belong before they ever need support themselves.

Asking for help doesn’t have to create the relationship.

Lads can feel part of the group long before they need support, or without ever needing it at all. But if life does throw them a curveball, they’re already in a place where they know they’ll be supported.

Care before correction addresses what happens when behaviour crosses a line. Care doesn’t remove accountability or mean unconditional approval. It means challenging the action without reducing the entire person to it, requiring the bloke to recognise when he’s messed up and put it right, then preserving a route back from it.

Where it’s obvious that people give a s**t, challenge is far more likely to be heard and acted upon.

One delegate captured a central takeaway:

“Availability of support is not the same as accessibility or usability of support.”

These ideas were not created in a lecture theatre. They emerged from years of observing how thousands of men build trust, offer support and protect belonging within this community.

Thank you to the Boys’ Impact 26 team for inviting us to contribute and for creating a space in which these questions could be examined seriously.

And thank you, lads. A group is only as strong as the culture its members create, and you boys are second to none!

***dePreventionDay

Today is  ***dePreventionDayA day close to our hearts.We set up shop six and a half years ago. Our aim? To provide a pla...
10/09/2026

Today is ***dePreventionDay

A day close to our hearts.

We set up shop six and a half years ago. Our aim? To provide a place where lads can go for banter, to lift up the achievements of their mates and have a laugh.

But also a place based on mutual respect and non-judgement, where it was clear, if times get rough, that it’s fine to ask for help, and the boys will not only not judge, they will rally.

We believe that already being in such a space when that happens can make a real difference.

Over the last six and a half years we’ve lost two of our own:

LCpl Taylor Cole (Royal Signals ) aged 20

and

Corporal Steve Hughes (The Royal Welsh ) aged 25

We raised £30,000 in memory of Taylor, and have committed to raise the same for James’ Place in memory of Steve.

On World Su***de Prevention Day, as we look towards the unveiling of a memorial dedicated to service personnel and veterans who have died by su***de at the National Memorial Arboretum next Sunday, we are asking our friends and followers beyond the Lads’ Advice group to support us in our efforts.

The recent news from Papyrus brings into sharp focus the need for organisations like James’ Place, and the necessity that we all get behind their life-saving work.

If you can spare a couple of pounds, you can support our fundraiser here:

www.justgiving.com/page/justbefu***ngkind
(Clickable link in bio)

If you can share this post, you’ll be helping to spread our message, raise awareness of the group and our fundraiser, and highlight the essential, life-saving work done every day by James’ Place

Thank you 💙

Sad news from PapyrusPAPYRUS has provided a much-needed service to young people at risk of su***de, and we have been pro...
08/09/2026

Sad news from Papyrus

PAPYRUS has provided a much-needed service to young people at risk of su***de, and we have been proud to fundraise for them and work alongside them in our shared mission to prevent su***de.

Our thoughts are with our friends, colleagues who have been affected by this news, and the entire PAPYRUS team, who have supported so many young people when they needed it most.

We want any young person in crisis to be able to access support quickly. Alternative support options are included in the post below, and we will update our members and followers with any further routes that emerge in the coming weeks and months.

Can you hold someone accountable for the worst thing they’ve ever done without deciding that’s all they’ll ever be?Yeste...
08/09/2026

Can you hold someone accountable for the worst thing they’ve ever done without deciding that’s all they’ll ever be?

Yesterday, our founder Gav Topley spent the day at HMP YOI Feltham’s Youth Literacy Festival.

He took with him a poem called They Can Lock the Locks, But They Can’t Stop the Clocks.

Gav wrote it after a 17-year-old boy killed a soldier, a father, with a single punch during a wider altercation.

The anger from the military community was completely understandable.

But some of the online reaction became ugly. The boy’s family were attacked, threats were made about his release and there were suggestions that veterans in prison should enact retribution.

It raised an uncomfortable question.

How many of us have done something in anger that could have ended very differently?

You can choose to throw a punch.

You can’t choose what happens after it lands.

A man died. A family lost someone they loved. The boy was responsible for that.

Trying to understand him doesn’t change any of that. It doesn’t excuse him.

It means refusing to decide that the worst thing somebody has ever done is all they are.

That’s why Gav wrote the poem.

Yesterday, he took it into Feltham.

Some of the young men asked to read it aloud. One recognised a friend’s situation in it. Another wanted it on his cell wall and property list.

One young man awaiting sentencing said it had given him belief he can be better, whatever happens at court.

That doesn’t mean a poem changed anyone’s life.

It means some words opened up a conversation.

And that matters to us.

Whether it’s a young man in prison or a bloke posting in Lads’ Advice because he’s fu**ed up, grieving, skint, frightened or simply having a s**t day, people are more likely to tell you what’s really going on when they know they won’t immediately be reduced to it.

That’s part of why the banter matters.

The piss-taking and the difficult conversations aren’t two different versions of Lads’ Advice.

The first helps create a space where the second can happen.

You don’t have to approve of everything somebody has done to leave them somewhere they can still belong.

Sometimes ***ngkind just asks a little more of us.

20 years ago today, the world lost an absolute fu***ng legend.Steve Irwin was fearless, hilarious, completely bonkers an...
04/09/2026

20 years ago today, the world lost an absolute fu***ng legend.

Steve Irwin was fearless, hilarious, completely bonkers and so relentlessly enthusiastic that he could make you care deeply about an animal you’d previously only considered hitting with a shoe.

A man who would see an enormous crocodile capable of tearing him in half and react like he’d just bumped into his best mate at the pub.

For a generation of lads, he wasn’t merely someone off the telly. He was appointment viewing.

And 20 years later, Robert Irwin is carrying that same unmistakable energy into another generation.

A family of legends!

Crikey, we still miss you, mate. 🐊💚

Meet Tom, the incredible 18-year-old dad from Yorkshire who lost his sight in a catastrophic firework accident last Nove...
02/09/2026

Meet Tom, the incredible 18-year-old dad from Yorkshire who lost his sight in a catastrophic firework accident last November and is now training for the TCS London Marathon 2027.

Over the weekend, Tom’s road to London picked up a mountain, a podcast and a few thousand lads along the way 👀👊

Becoming a dad at 18 is life-changing on its own.

Tom was preparing for that change when, the day before his partner Sophie’s 12-week scan, the accident happened.

He suffered severe burns and injuries to his face, eyes, neck and hands and was airlifted to hospital.

He survived.

But he lost his sight.

The final photograph shows Tom bandaged in hospital after the blast. His injuries were considerably more severe than the photograph shows, but Tom has chosen to keep the more graphic images private. Please swipe with care.

Since then, Tom and Sophie have welcomed a beautiful baby girl, while Tom and his mum, Danni, have begun training for London together.

Danni has become his guide runner and will complete all 26.2 miles alongside him.

What Danni is taking on is enormous too. She will be there through every training mile, every setback and, ultimately, every step of the marathon.

Mum and Son are taking on London to raise money for Royal National Institute for the Blind.

The charity supported Tom after he lost his sight and he has described that support as “absolutely amazing”. He wants to give something back and help other people facing sight loss receive that support too.

They began with 3.5 kilometres.

Then five.

Now they are chasing PBs and building towards London together.

One of our team, Gav , joined Tom, Danni and her partner Ryan last weekend for one of their training runs.

Gav was completing his own daily 5k as part of a year-long challenge raising money for James’ Place UK in memory of our mate and Lads’ Advice co-founder, Corporal Steve Hughes

During those five kilometres, he met the lad beyond the headline.

Tom is funny.

He is smart.

He is sharp, thoughtful, emotionally intelligent and ambitious.

He reads people quickly, gives as good as he gets when the banter starts and has absorbed an extraordinary amount of change without allowing it to swallow his personality.

The accident changed life for everybody around him. His family have had to adapt to that change alongside him.

Tom has learned, at extraordinary speed, to navigate his own new reality while understanding what the people he loves have been dealing with too.

That emotional intelligence is unusual at 18.

Life has thrown plenty at Tom and, so far, his answer has been: game on.

Tom’s blindness matters. Of course it does.

It has changed how he navigates the world and means running now requires enormous trust and communication.

But it is also just one part of his life.

It is not the full measure of him.

Tom didn’t come across as somebody waiting to be helped.

He came across as somebody ready to make an impact, with plenty to offer.

So when Lads’ Advice Snowdon 2026 came up, we asked whether he fancied joining us.

His initial response was:

“Why would I want to do that? I can’t see the view at the top, can I?”

Fair point 😂

He is now mega keen.

Snowdon will be the first real mountain Tom has ever climbed.

No metaphor required.

He’ll also be coming onto the LadChat podcast when we re-launch later this year.

He can talk about the accident, blindness and running.

But honestly, Tom is articulate, charismatic and funny.

Whatever he chooses to bring to the conversation will be worth a listen.

The internet loves a comeback story.

The danger is that the person at its centre can begin to feel most valuable when they are overcoming something publicly.

Tom, you are doing extraordinary things with what happened to you, and that is massively impressive.

Just know this:

The accident, and the challenges you’ve chosen since, may show the world some of what is already in you.

They didn’t put it there.

London is a serious challenge, and we’ll be firmly behind you and your mum as you take it on.

But it’s a goal you have set for yourself.

It’s not an audition for your place among us.

We invited you to Snowdon and LadChat because you’re mega and we know you’ll fit right in with the legends who are already a part of our group.

The lads will have plenty to offer you.

And you have plenty to offer the lads.

The marathon is impressive, mate.

But so are you.

You already have your family in your corner.

Now you’ve got 7.5K blokes at Lads’ Advice in your corner too.

Welcome 👊💙

Next stop, Snowdon.

Then LadChat.

Then London 2027.

After that, whatever Tom decides comes next.

It’ll probably be mega.

Even if it’s a bit of a rest 😆

Follow Tom & Danni: Unfiltered across Facebook, Instagram and TikTok for the training, the mountain, the marathon and everything beyond it.

If you’ve got this far, it’s clear you find Tom as inspiring as we do, so why not share this post and help his story travel further?

Cheers the boys 💪👊

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