The West Collective

“Sometimes selflessness is just self-abandonment with a better name.” 😮‍💨🫣🫠

said this in our live studio conversation and I felt it somewhere I wasn’t expecting.

I have absolutely called it servant leadership when really I was just quietly disappearing from myself.

You say yes when you mean no.
You shrink so other people feel comfortable.
You pour into everyone around you and wonder why you feel empty.
You call it being a good person.
You call it showing up.
You call it leadership.

Somewhere in there we just quietly stop showing up for ourselves…and I don’t think we talk about that part nearly enough.

The relationship you have with yourself sets the tone for every single one you have…how are you treating it?

Parts 1 and 2 of this 3 part studio session with are live and part 3 drops this Thursday. Drop PODCAST48 for part 1 or PODCAST49 if you’re ready for part 2 in the comments below to give it a listen!

I saw a reel the other day where a woman referred to herself as the family’s “Director of Everything.”

And tbh, i’ve never felt more seen. 😂

Because as women…at one point or another, many of us became the keeper of the calendar, the meal planner, the memory holder, the scheduler, the finder of lost things, the logistics coordinator, and the person everyone turns to when they need an answer.

Not because we do everything on our own, but because we often carry a lot of the invisible mental load that keeps daily life moving.

It’s no wonder we’re tired. 🤪🫠😴

So let’s have some fun with this…finish this sentence in the comments below:

For one weekend, I’d like to be relieved of my duties as __________.

I’ll go first:

Investigative Officer of “the one shoe that’s missing” when we’re in a rush to get out the door 🤪

Your turn. 👇

This one hit me right between the eyes. If I’m being honest, many of my prayers have come with a blueprint.

God, here’s what I want.
Here’s when I’d like it.
Here’s how I’d like you to deliver it.
Thanks so much.

And yet some of the biggest blessings in my life arrived looking nothing like what I asked for.

Jobs ending.

Relationships changing.

Doors closing.

Plans unraveling.

At the time, it felt like loss. Looking back, it was protection.

Sometimes the answer isn’t no.

It’s just not in the packaging you expected.

How has this showed up in your life? Let me know in the comments below. Drop the word PODCAST48 to grab the direct link to part 1 of this 3 part live episode with my friend 👇🏻

I found this photo today.

It was taken shortly after I lost my corporate job during Covid.
At the time, it felt like my entire world had been flipped upside down.

What makes me laugh now is that the woman in this photo was convinced she was experiencing the worst thing that had ever happened to her professionally. Meanwhile, God was up there like, “Ma’am, respectfully, we’re just getting started.” 🤪

She thought her story was ending.
That those 20 years were somehow wasted.
That she was being forced to let go of something she loved.

What she couldn’t see at the time was that she had spent so much of her life building someone else’s vision that she had never stopped to ask what she was capable of building for herself.

If I could sit down with her today, I’d tell her to stop panicking.
The career wasn’t a mistake. The leadership experience wasn’t wasted. None of it was for nothing.

Every difficult boss, every promotion she had to fight for, every room where she had to prove herself, every lesson in people, operations, marketing, leadership, and resilience was preparing her for something she couldn’t see...YET.

I’d tell her that one day she’ll build the room she spent years searching for. That she’ll get to help other people feel seen.
That the things she values most will finally stop competing with her work instead become the very ethos that everything she builds is rooted in.

If I could go back and talk to her for five minutes, I wouldn’t give her advice. I’d just tell her to keep walking. The life she’s praying for already exists - she just hasn’t met it yet.