27/10/2026
🚨🍺 𝐔𝐑𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐏𝐔𝐁𝐋𝐈𝐂 𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓 🍺🚨
𝐖𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐏𝐎𝐎𝐍𝐒 𝐑𝐄𝐅𝐔𝐆𝐄𝐄 𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐌𝐌𝐄
(Not one for the kids, they shouldn’t be using social media anyway) 🙄
Following recent developments, it appears we may be receiving an influx of displaced Wetherspoons regulars going forward.
We understand this is a worrying and confusing time for many of you.
Some of you have been drinking in the same chair since 2009. Some of you haven’t ordered a drink using your actual voice since 2017. And some of you genuinely believe a full English breakfast should cost less than a packet of Lurpak.
We appreciate that entering a bar with character, atmosphere and a landlord who knows his customers’ names may be a traumatic experience.
So, to ease your transition back into normal society, we’ve prepared a few guidelines.
🍺 𝐎𝐏𝐄𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐒
⏰ We open at 12pm.
That’s 12pm. In the AFTERNOON.
Not 8am. Not when the milkman’s still out. Not while normal people are brushing their teeth.
If you’re banging on the door at 8:15am demanding a pint of Ruddles, you’ll be directed towards the nearest bus shelter to continue your morning.
🍺 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐅𝐀𝐒𝐓
We don’t serve breakfast.
There is no full English for £4.99.
There are no rubber eggs, suspicious sausages or beans served in a tiny pot for absolutely no f*cking reason.
If you want breakfast, have some toast before you leave home.
If you’ve already left home, have some pork scratchings and pretend it’s bacon.
🍺 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐓𝐎𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐒
Our toilets are located on the ground floor.
Yes. THE SAME FLOOR AS THE BAR.
No climbing three flights of stairs, passing through two fire doors, crossing a suspension bridge or finding yourself in a completely different postcode.
You can now have a p*ss without your Fitbit congratulating you on completing a half-marathon.
We appreciate this is revolutionary.
🍺 𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐑 𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐄𝐒
We know - Our b**r prices are competitive.
Please don’t stand at the bar telling us you can get the same pint 87p cheaper in Wetherspoons.
You can also get a blowy cheaper in certain parts of Thailand, but nobody wants to hear about that every time they order a drink.
🍺 𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐃𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐒
We don’t have an app.
To purchase a pint, you must physically approach the bar and SPEAK TO ANOTHER HUMAN BEING.
Don’t panic.
Simply say, “Pint of l***r, please.”
One of our highly trained members of staff will then pour you a pint.
You don’t need your phone, a QR code, a password, your mother’s maiden name or a f*cking software update.
🍺 𝐓𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐄 𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐈𝐂𝐄
We don’t do table service.
If you sit at table seven for 45 minutes staring at the door waiting for someone to bring you twelve pints and a bowl of chips, you will die of thirst.
Get off your arse.
🍺 𝐁𝐀𝐑 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐎𝐋𝐒
We have stools AT THE BAR.
You’re allowed to sit on them.
You may also talk to the person next to you.
You can discuss football, the weather, the price of b**r or why your mate Dave’s third marriage is going exactly the same way as the first two.
This is called socialising.
It was very popular before everyone became a miserable b*astard staring at a screen.
🍺 𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐏𝐄𝐓
Our carpet is just a carpet.
We don’t have a dedicated Instagram page for it.
Nobody has written a coffee-table book about it.
And if you photograph it, we’ll assume you’re either pi**ed or collecting evidence for an insurance claim.
🍺 𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐏𝐔𝐁 𝐌𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐙𝐈𝐍𝐄
We don’t have one.
However, we do occasionally have b**r mats featuring expertly drawn coc*s!
Some have balls.
Some have p***s.
One particularly impressive specimen had a little face on the end.
We believe in supporting local artists.
🍺 𝐋𝐀𝐃𝐈𝐄𝐒, 𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐄 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄
You cannot post your table number on Facebook and wait for a sexually confused quantity surveyor from Stoke to send you six shots of Sambuca because he’s convinced you’re going to marry him.
If you want free drinks, you’ll have to endure the traditional method of listening to a 58-year-old divorcee called Gary explain why his wife “never understood him”.
🍺 𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐅𝐅
We actually like our staff.
We pay them, speak to them like human beings and occasionally ask how their day is going.
We’ve never told them to f*ck off and get a job at Tesco……….yet!
Although after dealing with some of you, they might seriously consider it.
🍺 𝐋𝐀𝐔𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐄𝐑
You may hear people laughing.
Please don’t be alarmed.
This is called having a good time.
Unlike sitting alone at 9:30am beneath the sort of lighting normally reserved for police interviews, staring into a £1.99 pint and wondering where it all went wrong.
🍺 𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐈𝐂
We play music.
Sometimes people sing.
Sometimes people dance.
Sometimes a bloke who hasn’t seen his own feet since 1998 decides he’s Michael Jackson.
We let him get on with it.
It’s entertainment.
🍺 𝐏𝐎𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐒
The owners voted Remain.
He lost.
He’s got over it.
If you haven’t, there’s a bloke called Barry who comes in the odd time. He’ll argue with you about Brexit, immigration, electric cars and whether the moon landing was filmed in Blackpool.
He knows absolutely f*ck all about any of them.
You’ll get on brilliantly.
🍺 𝐏𝐎𝐏𝐏𝐘 𝐏𝐎𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐘
𝐖𝐄𝐀𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐌 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐃𝐄!!
🍺 𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐑 𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐄𝐒 — 𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐈𝐍
Again our prices are competitive.
This is because we are an independent bar, not a multinational organisation capable of buying enough l***r to refloat the Titanic.
We also have bills to pay, staff to support and a couple of owners who try and bring Flight Night to the next level.
We apologise for this outrageous business model.
🍺 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐒
If you have any complaints, please approach one of the owners.
They will listen carefully, nod sympathetically and then tell you where you can shove your TripAdvisor review.
🍺 𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆
If you walk through the door, look around and loudly announce, “It’s cheaper in Spoons,” please understand that everybody in the bar already knows.
It’s also cheaper to drink at home in your underpants.
Yet here we all are.
❤️ 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘…
Despite all the above, you’re genuinely welcome.
Come in, pull up a stool, have a laugh, make some friends and support your local.
We don’t care where you’ve been drinking, what you voted for or whether your favourite breakfast is a microwaved sausage bap and a pint of Guinness.
We’re all here for the same reason.
To escape the wife, avoid doing the garden and talk absolute bo****ks with people we barely know.
🍻 𝐖𝐄𝐋𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐄 𝐓𝐎 Flight Night Sports Bar - Sandygate - Burnley & The Tungsten Arms.
𝐍𝐎 𝐀𝐏𝐏. 𝐍𝐎 𝐓𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐄 𝐍𝐔𝐌𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐒. 𝐍𝐎 𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄-𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐓𝐑𝐄𝐊 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐀 𝐏*𝐒𝐒.
𝐉𝐔𝐒𝐓 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐏𝐄𝐑 𝐏𝐄𝐎𝐏𝐋𝐄, 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐏𝐄𝐑 𝐁𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐑 𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐄𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐕𝐄.
𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅*𝐂𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐁𝐀𝐑. 😂🍺
